#gonna get beat up by a 10 year old
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Somehow chapter 3 feels like not enough happened while also having a lot happen :Ic
#imagine if we run into malleus looking like a younger version of himself while were in lilillias dream#gonna get beat up by a 10 year old#twisted wonderland spoilers#twst spoilers#twst#lillia vanrouge#ik we dont know a lot about idias dad but deep in my soul i know he builds gundam and lego sets in his spare time
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Was supposed to have a zoom call with a psych today at 11, went to click on the call link at 10:50, only to find they sent a "failure to attend" email at 10:49 🤔
There was nothing in the emails about having to be logged in a certain time, the only instruction I was given was to NOT join the call *too early*. Well apparently being 10 minutes early is too late.
Fuck these people.
#skip talks#and even tho I'm pissed off at this dr for having the patience of a 2 year old#I'm still gonna beat myself up over this cause like#maybe i should've clicked the link while i was still getting ready maybe i shouldn't have assumed 10 minutes was early enough#fucking hell I'm so annoyed
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˙ ✩°˖ ✈️ stay still!! / caleb x reader
synopsis; caleb would lay his head on your lap forever if he could. he's a bit more reluctant about staying still when you bring out a weapon (tweezers) to use on him though.
🍎 pomme's notes - honestly he just has really nice eyebrows. what can i say
⋆ 1k words / fluff / reader is gender neutral / 2nd person
caleb loves laying on your lap.
the first time he did was when you were still kids — he was climbing a tree at a park you two often hung out at, and after picking two apples from said tree, he promptly made his way down to you.
with the widest grin 10-year-old caleb could muster, he looks at you and beams;
"pip!! look at what i got us!!"
his eyes shone bright, crinkling at the corners upon seeing you light up and flashing him a smile with a tooth missing. when he leaned down to sit next to you, you looked up at him and patted your lap, telling him "put your head here!! a pillow after you got us apples!!" and he swore his heart skipped a beat.
in retrospect, maybe that was the first time caleb realized he liked you, not just as a close friend — but that was a thought he could ponder about another day. right now, you looked at him with the same eyes as you excitedly pat your lap. only it was fifteen years later, and you were finally dating.
as he happily strides towards you, you think that if caleb had a tail, it'd be wagging excitedly at the idea of resting on your lap. the fleet's ever-so-serious colonel caleb xia, melting away and donning a lovesick smile on his face.
he settles on the couch, legs hanging off the edge — stupidly big man acting like a tiny puppy. head finally resting on your lap, caleb speaks up with a teasing tone;
"what's up pipsqueak? missing your favorite weighted plushie on your lap?"
"mmh, i sure did. i missed my favorite doll to experiment on."
oh.
so that's why you were so eager to get him lying down on your lap. he laughs nervously, getting ready for the worst and that's when he sees it. tweezers in your dominant hand.
visibly turning more pale, he tries to get himself out of the torturous experience you're about to put him through.
"actually, i think i have something to do, gorgeous! wow, it sure is getting late and dinner isn't gonna prepare itse-"
"i already ordered takeout. don't you worry about a thing, colonel xia, nothing will come in the way of my tweezers and your brows", you interrupt him, and that's when reality sinks in for him.
caleb is done for. the last time you did his eyebrows was two years ago, when he came back home from the DAA for spring break, and he still remembers the sting of it all.
he needed to get out.
"y- you know, you really don't have to do this!! i can handle it myself!!"
"yeah, but i want to. what kind of partner would i be if i don't take care of my handsome and lovely boyfriend, who's definitely not trying to get out of this?"
he gulped, almost comically so. you caught him, and there was no way out of this one — or maybe there was. he didn't want to do this, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
puppy eyes. caleb stared at you and tried to look as pitiful as he possibly could, praying to every deity out there that you'll have some mercy on his soul.
"come on, Y/N.. my eyebrows look fine and i don't wanna waste your time — and this hurts. i don't understand how you do it, and i could never be as strong as you. please, please, please spare me. pretty please?"
you snort and lean down, pressing an exaggerated wet kiss on his forehead, making sure to emphasize the 'mwah' sound.
"nope! loved the puppy eyes, though. you should do that more often. alright, if there are no further inquiries, i'm gonna ask you to sit tight and relax pretty boy. let's get this done."
caleb stiffens when he realizes there's no way out of this. how is it that he went through DAA training, the fleet's conditioning, but somehow, you doing his eyebrows was the end of him? he's lost in his thoughts now, thinking about happy memories, but when your tweezers make contact with his skin, he immediately flinches and starts whining.
"ow ow ow ow ow, pips! it hurts! it hurts!"
you smile and flick his forehead lightly,
"i didn't even touch you yet! you always call me dramatic but you're not any better!!"
and then you pull out a hair.
"oh my go- i can't. i can't do this, please pipsqueak, please, have some mercy on your boyfriend."
and another one.
and he yelps, keeps on wriggling and trying to get out of your grasp. he thinks that you're stupidly strong right now — and all that strength is used in order to make him suffer.
"i thought you loved me!! we grew up together!! Y/N, you're hurting the love of your life, plea- ow!!"
you're giggling now, watching your big, strong, and fearless caleb being reduced to yelps as you do his eyebrows.
he inhales sharply, trying to roll away from your hands and begging for mercy, "it hurts!! please tell me you're done with the right brow, please pips!!".
laughing even harder now, you drag him back by the shoulder to his original position on your lap, and he has his face hidden in his hands, eyes tightly shut. he's shaking his head in disagreement and fake crying.
"oh my god, sit still, you dummy! if you keep on wriggling, i'm gonna put you on a cilantro only diet for the entire week!!"
and that seems to do it. he settles down again, but not without a few whines and sniffles.
drama queen.
when you're finally done (not without some more "ow ow ow- ouch!!" and "you hate me! you hate your boyfriend!" from him), he gets up and admires your work in the mirror. he wipes a stray tear that he insists isn't a tear but rather a hair that fell in his eye, and while you beg to differ, you let him have this small win.
"light work. this was a breeze", caleb exhales. free at last he thinks. that is, until he hears you hum. and he knows you — that hum meant something bad for him.
"oh yeah? same time next week then, boyfriend."
you swear you can see the color drain from his face, and you giggle.
such a drama queen. but he's your drama queen, all yours.
🍎 pomme's final notes - this is my offering to him because i really really want farspace deprivation to come home </3 it's the only card of his that i'm missing :((
#⋆ pomme writes#caleb x reader#caleb#love and deepspace#lads#caleb x you#lads x reader#love and deepspace x reader#lads caleb#he's so stupid i love him#⋆ neigepomme
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slipping through my fingers| JACK HUGHES





— ⟡ summary | in which y/n and Jake childhood best friends who've always had something there for each other. But once jack gets drafted everything changed for both of them.
— ⟡ warnings | none (that I know of)
— ⟡ word count | 17.8k (GUYS IM SORRY)
— ⟡ gabs note | hiii!!! im so excited to finally start writing again! I apologizer if this seems rushed. also this is EXTREMELY INACCURATE!!! please don't think this is literal, I don't know how some of these things work. also i apologize if this is cringe bc I CANNOT write romance for the life of me. I'm currently on spring break so I'll be trying to take advantage of being able to write a few things! if anyone wants to request or suggest anything don't hesitate to go into my inbox . i'll try to get to it and write it as soon as I can :) after spring break I may be a little inactive as i'm trying to lock in, in some of my classes before the semesters is over (ap econ and living earth are actually kicking my ass)
⟡ slipping through your fingers | jack hughes (jacks pov)
Part two

You've known Jack since you were kids. Backyard games of street hockey, summer nights spent on the lake, and watching him skate around with his brothers. you were always there. best friends through and through.
The first time you met Jack, you were about 10 years old. You had just moved into the neighborhood and the first thing you noticed was the street hockey that was happening right outside of your house. The kids from the neighborhood were scattered in every direction, sticks raised, yelling at each other. The one who caught your attention right away was the kid with the wild hair, darting around the group with such speed that it was almost impossible to keep up. He made it look effortless. He, of course, was jack.
You were lonely at first, standing awkwardly by the curb or watching the game through your bedroom window . Jack, always the curious one, had spotted you one day as you were sitting on the curb and skated over with a big grin.
"You gonna watch all day, or do you wanna join us?" he’d asked, not missing a beat, despite being out of breath. his eyes were full of that contagious energy.
You'd hesitated, feeling unsure. “I don’t know. I’m not really good at this... I’ve never really played before.”
"Come on! I’ll teach you," Jack insisted. "It’s easy, you just gotta push the puck this way, and then..." He demonstrated, sending the puck flying past you. "See? Just like that!"
It wasn’t perfect, but you tried. And Jack, always encouraging, cheered you on even as you missed the puck completely a few times. "Don’t worry. You’ll get it. It’s all about having fun."
From that moment on, you and Jack were inseparable. Summer after summer, it was the same routine. Jack, with his scruffy hair and infectious smile, would be the one to drag you out onto the street, even if you were just coming off a bad day at school or feeling a little down.
One of your favorite memories came when you were both about 12 years old. It was a hot, sticky summer afternoon. Jack, as usual, had the game already set up, calling the shots while the other neighborhood kids were pretending to be superstars in a game that felt far more like a chaotic free for all than a real match.
"You in or what?" Jack shouted, holding out a stick. “This game’s going nowhere without you.”
You rolled your eyes, already seeing the sweat dripping from his forehead, his shirt clinging to his back. "You know, I was just thinking about going inside and having a popsicle."
"Are you really gonna let me down like this?" Jack raised an eyebrow, grinning from ear to ear. “you promised you'd play after school."
"Fine," you said with a laugh, grabbing the stick. "But this time, I’m definitely winning."
You didn't win, at least not that day, but you had so much fun trying. Jack was so fast, his little tricks and turns keeping you on your toes, but every time he made a move, you were there to give it your best shot. You kept pushing him, running after the puck until the sun dipped below the horizon, and both of you were covered in dirt and sweat, laughing until your stomachs hurt.
That night, you sat side by side on the dock by the lake, feet dangling in the cool water as you two ate ice cream bars. The night was quiet except for the distant croak of frogs.
“You were so close to getting me,” Jack said between breaths, a playful edge to his voice. He tilted his head back to look at the sky. “You’ll get me next time. Just wait.”
You chuckled, watching him with a teasing smile. "Yeah, sure, Jack. Maybe when I’m 18 and you’ve forgotten how to skate."
Jack laughed loudly, nudging you with his elbow. “Not a chance. I’ll always be better. But hey, I can teach you some moves if you want.”
“Oh, I bet you would,” you said, rolling your eyes. “Teach me how to win, too?”
"Obviously," he said with a grin, though there was a genuine warmth in his eyes. “I’ll make you into a skating legend if that's what you want.”
You didn't know it then, but those summers spent with Jack would become some of the best memories of your life. Even when the seasons changed and the street hockey games moved indoors. Jack’s determination never left. You spent every Saturday watching him at the rink, your nose pressed against the cold glass as he glided across the ice, his stick flashing, eyes full of focus. He was good. Too good, in fact. And with every game, the crowd cheered louder with his dreams growing bigger.
⟡
By the time you and Jack hit your early teens, things start to feel different. It’s not obvious at first just a lingering glance here, a nervous laugh there. Jack’s still Jack competitive, loud, always pulling you into whatever chaos he’s creating. But sometimes, when his hand brushes against yours, or when he looks at you a second too long after you’ve made a joke, it feels like something is shifting beneath the surface. You notice it, even if you don’t understand it yet.
The way he seems to notice you more, how he’s always trying to catch your eye in a group conversation, how his voice drops just a little when he says your name. It’s subtle, and you try to ignore it. He’s your best friend, right? Nothing has changed between you two. You’re still the same, pulling pranks on each other, laughing at dumb things, challenging each other to stupid games on long summer afternoons.
But the moments keep building like when he reaches across the table to grab something and his fingers graze the back of your hand, leaving a warmth that lingers far longer than it should. Or when you catch him staring at you when you’re talking, and his expression shifts just a fraction of something unreadable there for a brief second before he masks it with a grin.
And then there are those times when the air feels too quiet. Like when you’re lying next to each other on the grass, watching the stars, and the silence stretches between you two in a way it never has before. It’s not comfortable anymore, this space. It’s heavy.
You’re 14 when you notice it for real. You’re both sitting on the dock, summer sun dipping low behind the trees, casting everything in a golden haze. Jack’s freshly showered from practice, hair still damp, the scent of soap and fresh air clinging to him. You’re half listening to him ramble on about a play he’s been trying to perfect, his words weaving in and out of the soft, distant hum of the lake’s waves against the dock.
But something in the air is different. It feels thicker. The kind of tension you get when you can’t tell whether the storm is coming, or if it’s already here and you’re just waiting for it to break. You can feel the weight of the evening sun on your skin, but your heart feels heavy, like it’s pounding against your ribs, a rhythm you’re trying to ignore.
“You’re not even listening,” he accuses, nudging you with his knee, and you startle, realizing you haven’t heard a word he’s said for the last few minutes.
“I’m listening,” you argue, even though you weren’t.
Jack raises an eyebrow, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “No, you’re not. You’ve been all quiet. What's up with you?”
You scoff, trying to brush it off. “Me? You’re the one who’s weird,” you tease, attempting to lighten the mood, but your words feel hollow, even to you.
He doesn’t laugh. Instead, he studies you, his expression more serious than usual. His gaze shifts from your face to your hands, and then back to your eyes like he’s trying to figure something out that you aren’t even aware of.
“Yeah, maybe.” He shrugs, leaning back on his elbows, staring out across the lake with a far-off look in his eyes. “Or maybe it’s just us.”
The words hang in the air heavy with meaning you don’t fully understand. You freeze trying to process what he’s said. It isn’t just the words, it's the way he said them. The tone in his voice is softer than usual almost uncertain. There’s something fragile in his eyes, like he’s letting a piece of himself slip past you hoping you’ll catch it, but not quite trusting you to. You don’t know how to respond.
You try to shake off the discomfort. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Jack glances at you, his lips quivering at the edges, but there’s a heaviness in his gaze now. “I don’t know,” he mutters. “Just growing up.” He pauses, his voice quieter now almost too soft for the space between you two. He looks at you then, really looks at you his eyes searching for something in yours like he’s asking a question that doesn’t have an easy answer. Something you’re not ready to answer not sure you even can.
You want to say something to reach out and close that space but you can’t find the words. Everything that’s been building between you two feels like it’s teetering on the edge of something unspoken. And the closer Jack gets to this new world he’s creating for himself this future that’s already starting to pull him away from you the more it feels like you’re both standing on the precipice of it.
You don’t have an answer, so you reach over and grab his hand. It’s instinctual, a reflex more than anything else. His fingers slide easily between yours, like they’ve always belonged there. It’s familiar, comforting even. But there’s something different in the way he holds your hand this time. He doesn’t let go immediately like he always does. He holds on for just a moment longer, and in that brief pause, the weight of it hits you.
His gaze drops to your joined hands, and you see a flicker in his eyes something unreadable, maybe even a little vulnerable before he looks back up at you. The quiet between you two stretches longer than it should, and you’re not sure if it’s because of the summer air, or because of the uncertainty that’s silently wrapping itself around both of you.
“I think we’ll figure it out,” you say softly, trying to anchor this moment, even though the ground beneath you feels like it’s shifting.
Jack’s smile is small, unsure. It’s not his usual confident grin, but it’s there. Barely, but it’s there. He doesn’t let go of your hand. Not yet.
You don’t know what “figuring it out” means, or if you even can figure it out. All you know is that in this moment, with the sun setting behind the trees and the sound of water lapping against the dock beneath you, everything feels poised on the edge of something you don’t understand.
But you’re scared that the moment you try to reach for it, Jack might pull away.
⟡
It’s late, the fire has burned down to a few glowing embers, and the crickets are the only sound beside the occasional splash of water against the dock. You’re sitting with Jack, your legs hanging over the side, toes brushing the cool surface of the lake. The night is quiet, almost too quiet, and for the first time in a long time, there’s a distance between you that wasn’t there before.
Jack’s usually carefree, his humor quick, his energy contagious. But tonight, he’s different. He’s quieter, eyes lost somewhere beyond the horizon. You’ve known him long enough to know when something’s off.
"Jack, you okay?" you ask, not pushing, just asking.
"Do you ever feel like things are changing?" His voice is low, almost hesitant, and you turn to look at him, your heart skipping a beat.
You nod slowly, sensing that this conversation is heading somewhere you’ve both been avoiding for too long. "Yeah, I’ve been feeling it." You pause, meeting his eyes, and for the first time, you really see him. His face, the way his eyes linger on you, the way his lips part like he’s about to say something more. It’s all so familiar, and yet, everything feels new. "It’s been hard to ignore."
Jack exhales sharply, as if he’s been holding his breath. He leans back, letting his head rest against the wood of the dock, looking up at the stars above. "I’ve been trying to figure it out. For a while now. What’s going on between us."
You swallow, the weight of his words settling in your chest. Your voice is barely a whisper when you respond. "What do you mean?"
Jack doesn’t look at you right away, but you see his jaw tense, like he’s trying to gather his thoughts. Finally, he glances over at you, his gaze intense. "I think I’ve been avoiding it. The way things have felt. I’ve always known you meant a lot to me. But it’s more than that now. And I can’t keep pretending I don’t feel it."
Your heart races. This isn’t just a fleeting moment, this is him, telling you exactly what you’ve been feeling. Your stomach flips as the words finally hit you.
"I’ve been feeling it too," you admit, your voice steady but your pulse thundering in your ears. "It’s different now, Jack. And I can’t pretend it’s not."
There’s a long silence between you two as the words settle in the space around you. You both know it’s out there now the truth that neither of you could avoid forever. The air feels thick, charged with everything you’ve been holding back.
Jack’s gaze softens as he turns fully toward you. He reaches out, his hand brushing against yours. "I’ve tried not to think about it, but it’s impossible," he admits, his thumb tracing along the back of your hand. "I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the way, I stopped thinking of you as just my best friend. And now I don’t know how to go back."
You feel your breath catch in your throat. This is it. The thing you’ve both been dancing around for so long, the thing neither of you knew how to say. But now, here it is, raw and real.
"I don’t want to go back," you say, your voice soft but certain. "I’ve felt the same way, Jack. For a while now."
"You know, I keep thinking back to when we were kids," he says quietly, almost as if he’s talking to himself. "Back when things were simpler. We used to hang out, play hockey, talk about everything and nothing. I always thought that was enough."
You smile, remembering those simpler times. "It was enough. It still is."
Jack laughs under his breath, but there’s something different in it. "Yeah. But now... I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about how things feel between us lately. And I don’t know how to handle it."
Your heart picks up a little pace, and you look at him, feeling a shift in the air between you two. It’s subtle, but it's there. His eyes are locked on you now, and the usual teasing glint is gone.
"I think I’ve known for a while," you admit, voice barely above a whisper. "That things have changed. That maybe… we’ve changed."
Jack’s gaze softens, and for a second, everything feels like it’s falling into place, like the puzzle pieces are finally lining up. "I’ve been thinking about it too," he says, his voice low. "And I don’t know if I’m ready for this to be weird between us. I don’t want it to be weird."
Your stomach flips at the vulnerability in his voice. "I don’t think it has to be. It doesn’t have to be weird, Jack."
He looks at you for a long moment, and you can tell he’s weighing his next words carefully. He reaches over, brushing a strand of hair from your face, and that simple touch feels like the universe’s nudge, reminding you that things have always been easy with him. There’s no pretending with Jack. There’s never been any pretending.
"I guess we’ve always been able to figure things out," Jack says, his voice steady now. "And maybe this is just… one of those times."
You nod, your chest tight as you try to put into words what you’ve been feeling for so long. But nothing really needs to be said. This moment, this quiet understanding between you two, is enough.
Jack leans in just a little, close enough that you can feel the warmth radiating from him, but not enough to cross the final line. His gaze flickers between your eyes, lingering on your lips before returning to your eyes again, as if he’s waiting for something. The space between you both seems impossibly small, charged with everything that’s unsaid.
You can’t deny it anymore the way your heart races in your chest, the way your breath feels shallow, as if you’ve been holding it in all this time. This moment, this change between you, feels like it could either break everything or put it all back together.
His hand hovers just inches from yours, like he’s unsure whether to close the distance, like he’s waiting for you to decide. The air is thick with the weight of it. You’ve both danced around this for so long, carefully, quietly, but now it feels like everything is teetering on the edge. One move, one step, and it’ll change everything.
“You’re not nervous, are you?” Jack’s voice is almost a whisper, his usual teasing gone. There’s something softer in the way he says it, like he’s genuinely asking, genuinely uncertain for the first time.
You laugh quietly, but it doesn’t feel like the teasing kind of laugh you’re used to. It’s shaky, full of nerves. “No... Just a little confused, I guess. Not sure if this is all too much.”
Jack shifts closer, and his hand brushes against yours, the lightest touch that sends a jolt through you. It’s a simple gesture, but it speaks volumes. He doesn’t look away now, and neither do you. His breath is slow, steady, and in the stillness, you hear his heart beating in time with yours.
“I’m not sure either,” he admits, his voice low. “But I think I’ve known for a while… I don’t think we can keep pretending things are the same. I can’t. And I’m not sure what will happen next, but I know I don’t want to screw it up.”
You swallow, your own uncertainty mirrored in his eyes. Everything that’s been left unsaid finally hangs in the air between you two, heavy and undeniable. The fear of what could change, of what could be lost, and the quiet hope that maybe just maybe it could work.
"Jack…” You start to say something, anything, but the words stick in your throat. You want to say that you’ve been feeling it too, that you’re terrified of losing this, of messing it all up. But the weight of it all is too much. So instead, you just shake your head, a small smile tugging at your lips despite the uncertainty in your chest. “I don’t know what happens next either.”
You hold his gaze for a beat longer, everything inside you pulling toward him, wanting to close the space between you both. And with that final breath, that quiet understanding, you realize it doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be figured out right now.
You lean in the rest of the way, tilting your head slightly, and then Jack’s lips meet yours.
It’s nothing like you expected. It’s soft, hesitant at first, like you both are testing the waters. But it’s real. And for the first time in a long time, you feel like you’re finally on the same page. It’s not about the future or the fear of change it’s just about right now, and the way everything feels when it’s just the two of you.
When you pull away, there’s a breathless pause, but it’s not awkward. It’s not forced. It’s just you, and him, and everything that’s been building between you finally making sense.
Jack’s forehead rests gently against yours. His eyes are still closed, and there’s a quiet smile playing on his lips. “I think I could get used to this,” he says, voice low, almost like he’s speaking to himself.
You let out a soft laugh, the tension between you both easing, and for the first time, it feels like you don’t need to say anything more. You both know. It’s not perfect, it’s not figured out yet but it’s real, and maybe that’s enough for now.
⟡
It’s almost midnight when your phone buzzes on your nightstand. You’re half asleep, barely registering the sound until it buzzes again. You squint at the screen, the glow too harsh in the dark room. It’s a text from Jack. “are you up?”
You rub your eyes and sit up the sleepiness fading as you type back. “yeah, what’s up? Are you okay?its midnight.” The dots appear and disappear. Then nothing. You frown, already knowing where this is going. “ want me to come over?” This time, the dots stay. “You don’t have too, just want to talk to you.”
You slip out of bed, grabbing a sweatshirt and slipping on your shoes without even thinking about it. Your house is quiet as you head out the back door and cut across the yard. Jack’s house is familiar, the kind of place you could walk to blindfolded. The back door is unlocked like it always is.
You find him on the couch, the TV on low, playing some old hockey highlights. His head is tipped back against the cushion but his eyes are open dark circles shadowing his face. He looks up when he hears you, his expression softening in a way that makes your heart ache a little.
“You didn’t have to come,” Jack says, sitting up.
“You knew I would,” you reply, kicking off your shoes and sitting down beside him. Your knee bumps against his. He’s in sweats and an old usa hockey hoodie, and his hair’s still damp from a shower. He looks tired.
Jack doesn’t say anything for a long time. His eyes stay on the screen, but you can tell he’s not really watching. The hum of the commentary blends into the background. You wait, not pushing you’ve always known how to give him space when he needs it.
“I can’t sleep,” he says finally, voice low. His knee bounces restlessly. “I keep thinking about the combine.”
You lean back against the couch, watching the screen as a highlight reel of some playoff game flickers by. “What about it?”
Jack sighs. “Everything. The tests. The interviews. The scouts. If I screw up, it’s going to be everywhere.” His hand runs through his hair, leaving it messy. “I mean, I’ve trained for this my whole life, right? But now that it’s actually here I don’t know.”
“You’re not going to screw up,” you say softly.
Jack lets out a hollow laugh. “Yeah? What if I do?”
You nudge his leg with your foot. “You won’t. But even if you did it wouldn’t change anything. Not with me.”
Jack’s eyes flick toward you, guarded but searching. He’s quiet for a beat. Then, so quietly you almost don’t catch it, “It’d change everything else.”
You shift toward him, turning so your knee presses more firmly against his. “Jack, you’ve worked your ass off for this. One bad day at the combine isn’t going to erase years of training and games and scouts already knowing you’re good enough.”
Jack’s jaw tightens, his eyes falling to his hands. His thumb rubs absently along the inside of his palm. “Yeah, but what if I’m not enough?”
You don’t hesitate. You reach over, lacing your fingers through his. His hand is warm, his skin rough from years of hockey sticks and gloves. He tenses for half a second, then relaxes into the touch.
“You’re enough,” you say, quiet but steady. “You’ve always been enough, Jack. Even if you didn’t have hockey.”
Jack’s eyes lift to meet yours, wide and a little raw. His thumb grazes the side of your hand, slow and deliberate.
“You really believe that?”
“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”
Jack’s mouth curves into the smallest smile. It doesn’t quite reach his eyes, but it’s something. His gaze drops back to the screen, though his hand stays in yours, his thumb running over your knuckles.
For a while, neither of you speak. The silence isn’t uncomfortable it’s the kind of quiet that feels like home. Jack’s breathing evens out, his knee resting against yours. The highlights on the screen blur together.
“Stay?” Jack asks after a long moment. His voice is quiet, almost hesitant.
You squeeze his hand. “Yeah.”
Jack shifts, leaning back against the couch. You lean into him, letting your head rest against his shoulder. His hand stays tangled with yours, his thumb brushing back and forth along your knuckles in a steady rhythm. Slowly, the tension in his body eases.
“Thanks,” Jack murmurs. His head tips toward yours, his breath warm against your hair.
“You don’t have to thank me,” you say, eyes drifting shut. “Just remember this. When it gets hard, when the pressure’s too much, remember you don’t have to do it alone.”
Jack’s hand tightens around yours, his breath catching for half a second. Then he relaxes.
“I’ll remember,” he promises, voice low and sure.
You smile, your heart steady now as you let the sound of his breathing and the flicker of the TV lull you toward sleep. You know there’s still a long road ahead, the combine, the draft, Jack’s rookie year but for now, this is enough.
It’s late afternoon when you find Jack on the ice, alone.
The rink is almost empty and quite the kind of quiet that makes the sound of skates cutting into the ice seem louder. Jack’s in a plain grey hoodie, a puck sliding back and forth between his stick blade as he moves through the neutral zone. His head is down, shoulders tense, and even from the stands, you can tell he’s overthinking it. His movements are sharp, almost mechanical like he’s trying too hard to be perfect.
You sit down on the bleachers, the cold from the rink seeping through your jeans. Jack’s been like this all week quiet, short answers, disappearing for extra hours at the rink. You didn’t have to ask why. The NHL Combine is in two weeks. The pressure’s been building, and Jack’s not the type to admit when it’s too much.
A sharp slap of the puck against the glass pulls you from your thoughts. Jack’s skating toward the blue line, his stick dragging behind him as he breathes heavily, a little unsteady. He circles back toward center ice, but his stride falters slightly just enough for you to notice.
“You’re overthinking it,” you call out, standing.
Jack glances up, his expression closed off but his eyes soften when he sees you. He coasts toward the boards, resting his forearms against the top. His breath comes out in sharp clouds of condensation.
“You’re not supposed to be here,” he says but there’s no bite to his words.
You shrug. “Figured you’d need moral support.”
Jack huffs a soft laugh but it doesn’t reach his eyes. His gaze drops to the ice. “Not really playing like someone who deserves it.”
You step closer, your hands resting on the edge of the boards. “Jack, you’re allowed to have a bad practice.”
Jack shakes his head. “Not now. Not this close.” His hands flex around his stick. “I can’t screw this up.”
“You won’t.”
Jack’s eyes flick toward you. There’s something guarded in his expression the same look he gets when he’s trying not to show how much it’s getting to him. His eyes are dark under the shadows of his helmet.
“You don’t know that,” he says quietly.
You swallow, searching for the right words. “Yeah, I do.”
Jack exhales sharply, his gaze drifting to the ice. He’s quiet for a long time before he speaks again, his voice low. “What if I’m not good enough?”
Your chest tightens at the vulnerability in his voice. He’s always been confident, cocky, even but this is different. This is the fear he doesn’t let other people see.
You rest your hand over his where it grips the top of the boards. His fingers twitch beneath yours, but he doesn’t pull away. “Jack” Your voice softens. “You’ve been working for this since you were a kid. One bad practice isn’t going to change the fact that you belong there.”
Jack’s mouth pulls into a thin line. His eyes stay locked on the ice.
“You know that, right?” you press.
Jack’s jaw tenses. He exhales through his nose and finally meets your eyes. “Yeah. I know.” But his voice is tight, like he’s still trying to convince himself.
You squeeze his hand lightly. “Come on. Take the helmet off. Let’s reset.”
Jack hesitates for a second before unbuckling his chin strap. His hair falls into messy waves as he pulls the helmet off, and you smile despite yourself.
“There’s the Jack I know,” you say softly.
Jack’s mouth tugs at the corner, the smallest hint of a smile breaking through the tension in his face. He sets the helmet down on the boards and rests his forehead against the glass, his eyes closed for a long moment. His breath fogs up the glass in front of him.
“Why are you so calm about this?” Jack murmurs.
You smile, even though he can’t see it. “Because I know you. And I know you’re going to be fine.”
Jack’s eyes open. He tilts his head toward you, his cheek pressed against the glass. His gaze lingers on you longer than it probably should. His expression softens, his mouth curving into something more familiar less guarded.
“You always know what to say,” Jack says quietly.
You shrug. “It’s part of the job description.”
Jack’s mouth tugs at the corner. He leans back from the glass, turning toward you. “And what job is that?”
“girlfriend” you say lightly, even though the words feel heavier than they should.
Jack’s gaze drops to your mouth for half a second before he catches himself. shaking his head slightly. “You’ve been overpaid.”
You laugh. “I don’t know. Pretty sure I’ve earned it.”
Jack’s hand slides from the boards, brushing against yours as he steps back onto the ice. The contact is brief a split second but it’s enough to make your breath hitch.
He skates backward, his eyes never leaving yours. “Stay?”
You smile. “Always.”
Jack nods, his jaw unclenching slightly. His shoulders relax as he turns and skates toward the far side of the ice. He moves differently now, smoother, looser. It’s not perfect, but it’s him.
⟡
Jack’s in Buffalo for the Combine. He’d been gone for almost a week now, thrown into a blur of interviews, medical tests, and physical evaluations. You’d been following the coverage clips of him flashing across social media, a quick shot of him stepping into the arena or walking down a hallway with other top prospects. He looked calm on the surface, but you knew better. The absence of him is starting to feel like a hollow ache beneath your ribs. You’ve talked to him every day, quick texts in the morning, rushed calls at night but it’s not the same as having him there next to you. He’s exhausted you can tell even through the phone but he’s not the type to admit when it’s too much.
You’re half asleep when your phone buzzes on the nightstand. It takes you a second to realize what’s happening, the glow from the screen sharp against the dark. You blink, rubbing your eyes as you reach for it for the sixth time this week knowing it was a text from Jack “are you awake?”
You sit up, sleep slipping away as you type back. “yeah. What's wrong? it’s late.” The typing bubbles appear, then disappear. Then nothing. You frown, already feeling the tightness in your chest. “want me to call?” A pause. “I just need to hear your voice.” Jack replied.
You hit the call button without even looking at his message. Jack answers on the second ring. “Hey,” you say softly. “Hey,” Jack’s voice is rough, low. He sounds tired.
“Did you just finish?”
“Yeah.” He exhales sharply. “Got back to my room like five minutes ago.”
“What happened?”
Jack lets out a humorless laugh. “Where do I start?” His voice is tight, and you picture the way he probably looks right now sprawled out on the hotel bed, arm draped over his eyes. “The bike test was brutal. My legs were shaking so bad I thought I was going to fall off.”
You wince. “That bad?”
“They crank up the resistance until you physically can’t pedal anymore,” Jack says. “I could barely stand afterward.” Your chest tightens. “Jack” he cuts you off. “And the VO2 max test?” Jack groans. “I thought I was gonna puke. I was seeing spots by the end.” You frown. “Did anyone else struggle that much?”
“Yeah, but I’m supposed to be better than that.” His voice sharpens. “I can’t afford to screw this up.”
“You didn’t,” you say quickly. “You weren’t there,” Jack says, his tone edged with something close to frustration. But then his breath catches, and his voice softens. “Sorry. I didn’t mean”
“It’s okay,” you interrupt gently. “What else happened?” Jack sighs. “Wingate test. They make you sprint all out on the bike for 30 seconds. My legs were already toast, so I tanked it.”
“Jack” you say once again, getting cut off “And the long jump?” He laughs under his breath, but there’s no humor in it. “I swear I’ve never jumped that short in my life.”
“Did Quinn do better?” you ask carefully. “Of course he did,” Jack mutters. “The scouts loved him.” Your heart aches at the sharpness in his tone. You know how much Jack admires Quinn, but that admiration is tangled up with the constant pressure to keep up.
“And then,” Jack’s voice lowers, frustration leaking through, “they threw me into interviews while I could barely breathe. One scout asked if I thought I deserved to go first overall.” Your mouth tightens. “Seriously?”
“Yeah. Another one asked if I think I’m better than Quinn.” You sit up straighter. “What the hell?” Jack mutters “I didn’t even know what to say,” His voice is low and tight. “I think I screwed it up.”
“You didn’t,” you say firmly. Jack doesn’t respond right away. You hear the rustling of sheets, the muffled sound of the TV in the background probably an old hockey game. “I don’t know,” Jack murmurs. “I need to be better.”
“Jack.” Your voice softens. “You’ve done enough. You’ve been working for this since you were a kid. You’re too hard on yourself” Jack’s quiet for a moment. Then, so soft you almost miss it “What if it’s not enough?” Your chest tightens. This is the fear he doesn’t let other people see.
“Hey,” you say softly. “Close your eyes.” Jack’s quiet for a second. “What?”
“Just trust me.”
A long breath. “Okay.”
“You’re on the ice,” you say. “Just you. The rink’s empty.” Jack’s breath steadies. “You’ve got the puck,” you continue. “Skating down center ice. No pressure, no scouts, no cameras. Just you.”Jack hums quietly, like he can almost see it.“You make the shot,” you say. “Bar down. Clean.” Jack exhales. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you say. “And you don’t even need to look, because you already know it’s in.”There’s a long stretch of quiet on the other end of the line. Then, so soft you almost miss it “I wish you were here.”
“I know,” you whisper, throat tightening. “Me too.” Jack sighs, and you hear the rustling of sheets as he shifts. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“You’re not going to find out,” you say, trying to sound light, but it comes out more fragile than you mean it to. Jack’s quiet for a long time. You think he might have fallen asleep until you hear him murmur, “You’re the only thing keeping me sane right now.” You press the phone closer to your ear, even though it won’t bring him any closer. “You’ve got this,” you whisper. “You’re going to be fine.”
Jack breathes out, low and even. “Stay on the phone with me?”
“Yeah,” you say, curling into your pillow. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Jack’s quiet for a while after that, but you don’t hang up. You stay there, listening to the sound of his breathing as it evens out, until the line finally goes quiet and you know he’s asleep. You don’t hang up. Not yet.
⟡
Jack’s been quiet all morning. His usual easy smile is nowhere to be found, replaced by a tight line of tension in his jaw. He’s been bouncing his knee relentlessly, his leg jittering under the table during breakfast at the hotel. He barely touched his food, pushing scrambled eggs around his plate until Quinn took it away and told him to stop torturing it. Now, he’s sitting next to you on the edge of the bed, his head tipped back against the wall, his fingers tapping absently against his knee. The hotel room is bright from the mid-morning sun filtering through the sheer curtains, but it feels too quiet too still like the entire day is holding its breath.
Jack’s name has been everywhere since the Combine. Every hockey account, every sports network, every mock draft all saying the same thing. First overall. Franchise player. Generational talent. He should be used to it by now, but it feels different this time. Closer. Like the weight of it all is pressing down on his chest. And you feel it too, even from miles away. You saw it during the Combine the way he tensed when people mentioned the draft, how he downplayed his scores and his interviews even when you knew he’d crushed them. Jack’s always been good at brushing things off, but this feels different. Bigger. Like it’s not just about hockey anymore. It’s about living up to something.
The draft isn’t until later tonight, but the weight of it is already pressing down. Jack’s been working toward this moment his whole life, the moment his name is called, the moment his future in the NHL becomes real and now that it’s finally here, it’s like he can’t figure out how to breathe through it.
You shift closer until your knee bumps his. “You’re thinking too hard.”
Jack’s eyes slide toward you, dark under the shadows of his lashes. He huffs out a breath. “How am I supposed to not think about it?” His voice is quiet, frayed at the edges.
You reach for his hand, your fingers slipping between his. He’s warm always is, but his hand is stiff, tense. “I don’t know. Maybe stop overthinking it.”
Jack lets out a shaky breath, his thumb brushing along your knuckles. His gaze drifts toward the window, but you can tell he’s not really seeing it. His mind is already at Rogers Arena, already running through every possible outcome. He’s been carrying the weight of this for months the expectations, the pressure, the comparisons to Quinn, to his dad and you know it’s only gotten heavier.
“Jack.” You squeeze his hand. He doesn’t look at you right away, but when he does, his eyes are wide, a little raw around the edges. You offer him a small smile. “You’ve got this.”
Jack’s mouth twitches like he wants to smile back, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “And what if I don’t?”
“You will.” You don’t hesitate, don’t even think about it. You just know. Jack’s been skating since before he could walk. He’s trained for this put in the work, put in the hours. He’s ready. Even if he can’t see it right now.
Jack’s gaze stays on you, his brow furrowing slightly. His hand tightens around yours. “I’m scared,” he admits, his voice barely above a whisper.
You shift closer until your shoulder presses against his. “That’s normal.”
Jack’s eyes darken. “What if I’m not good enough?”
“You are.”
Jack swallows hard, his jaw working. He looks away, his throat bobbing as he tries to steady his breathing. You can feel the tension radiating off of him, the way his chest rises and falls too quickly. His thumb rubs absently against the back of your hand.
You lean into him, resting your head against his shoulder. “It’s going to be okay,” you say softly. “Even if you don’t go first. Even if it doesn’t go the way you expect you’ll still have hockey. You’ll still have me.”
Jack’s breath stutters. He turns his head slightly, his cheek brushing against your hair. “You mean that?”
You lift your head and meet his gaze. “Of course I do.”
Jack’s hand slides from your hand to your knee, his fingers curling around it like he’s grounding himself there. His eyes search yours, and for a moment, it feels like the weight of the room shifts. The nerves are still there, the pressure, the uncertainty but some of the tension in his face softens. His eyes flick toward your mouth, then back to your eyes. He exhales slowly. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“You’ll never have to find out,” you say, just as softly.
Jack’s mouth tugs at the corner. He leans in, pressing his forehead against yours. “Promise?”
You smile, your hand lifting to his jaw. “Promise.”
Jack lets out a shaky breath and closes his eyes for a moment, his hand tightening on your knee. The quiet settles around you both, not the heavy kind, not the tense kind just quiet.
“Jack?” Quinn’s voice breaks the silence, followed by a knock at the door. “We’ve gotta go soon.”
Jack sighs. He lifts his head, his eyes lingering on you for a second longer before he pulls away. “Yeah, okay.”
Jack stands, adjusting his shirt and brushing his hands down his pants. His gaze flicks toward you, hesitant. “You’re coming with us, right?”
You stand too, straightening his collar. “Obviously.”
Jack’s mouth curves into something close to a real smile, small but genuine. He takes your hand again, linking your fingers as he leads you toward the door.
The car ride to Rogers Arena is quiet. Jack sits next to you in the backseat, his knee bouncing, his fingers tapping against his thigh. He’s wearing a fitted suit, his hair styled but still a little messy at the top. You can tell he’s trying not to overthink it, but the tension in his jaw gives him away.
Quinn and Luke sit in the back of the car, phone in their hand, scrolling through Twitter. The whole car feels charged, the anticipation building the closer you get to the arena. When you pull up, Jack hesitates for half a second before stepping out. His hand brushes against yours as you follow him out of the car.
Inside, the energy is palpable. The arena is packed with media, fans, scouts, the low hum of conversations mixing with the occasional burst of camera flashes. Jack tugs at the cuff of his jacket, his mouth pulling into a thin line. His eyes flick toward you.
You slip your hand into his, squeezing gently. “Deep breath,” you say.
Jack’s jaw relaxes slightly. He squeezes your hand back. His eyes linger on you for a beat before he nods. “Yeah. Okay.”
Quinn steps up behind him, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “You’ve got this”
Jack’s mouth twitches. He looks toward the draft stage, toward the rows of seats, the cameras, the scouts and then back at you. His hand tightens around yours.
“You’re with me, right?” Jack asks quietly.
You smile. “Always.”
Jack breathes out. And this time, when he looks toward the stage, the tension in his jaw fades just a little.
Jack’s heart is hammering. It’s too loud in here the buzz of conversation, the hum of the arena speakers, the occasional burst of laughter from a family. His suit jacket feels too tight across his shoulders, his tie choking him a little more with each second that passes. His name has been circling the draft floor for months, repeated on every broadcast and in every article first overall, franchise player, generational talent but none of it feels real right now. It feels heavy. Like the weight of the entire league is resting on his chest, squeezing the air from his lungs.
He shifts in his seat, his hand resting against his thigh, and feels your fingers slip between his. His head turns toward you automatically. You’re sitting beside him, close enough that your knee is pressed against his. Your hand is steady, your thumb brushing lightly over his knuckles. He doesn’t realize how hard he’s gripping you until you adjust your hand slightly, your grip soft but certain.
“You’re okay,” you whisper, low enough that only he can hear. Jack breathes out shakily. “Am I?” You smile soft, sure. “Yeah. You are.”
Jack’s gaze drops to the floor, his thumb smoothing over the inside of your wrist. He can feel the pulse there, steady beneath his touch. His heart’s not steady. It’s racing. He doesn’t know if it’ll settle until this is over until he hears his name.
Quinn is watching him. He’s sitting straight in his chair, hands resting on his thighs, but his eyes are soft when they meet Jack’s. “You’ve got this,” Quinn says quietly. Jack’s mouth twitches. He starts to nod, but then Luke leans across from Quinn.
“Yeah,” Luke adds, his grin lopsided, a little nervous but bright. “And if you don’t, you can always blame it on Quinn.”
Quinn rolls his eyes.
Jack huffs a soft laugh, but it fades quickly. His gaze shifts toward the stage, where the Devils’ management team is already gathering. The nerves coil tighter in his chest. His hand tightens around yours.
“You’re with me, right?” Jack asks quietly.
You don’t even hesitate. “Always.”
Jack’s eyes soften, some of the tension fading from his expression. He breathes out and shifts closer, his knee pressing into yours beneath the table. He doesn’t have time to say anything else before the commissioner steps up to the microphone.
Jack’s stomach drops. The noise in the arena swells as the camera swings toward the Devils’ table. The commissioner is still talking, but Jack barely hears it over the blood rushing in his ears. His legs feel locked beneath the table. His chest is tight.
“And with the first overall pick, the New Jersey Devils are proud to select from the US National Team Development Program… Jack Hughes.”
Your hand squeezes his.
Jack exhales. He stands on shaky legs as Quinn claps him on the back, Luke grinning wide as he jumps up to hug him. “Dude!” Luke laughs, his arms tight around Jack’s waist. Quinn pulls them both in, his head knocking against Jack’s shoulder. Jack’s laugh comes out a little breathless.
“Go get your jersey,” Quinn says, his voice thick with pride.
Jack’s hand is still locked with yours as he turns toward you. His expression is soft, his eyes dark and bright all at once. “You’re coming with me after this, right?”
You smile. “Try and stop me.”
Jack hesitates for half a second, then leans in. He kisses you quickly just a press of his lips against your cheek but it’s enough to make your breath hitch. His thumb brushes over your knuckles once more before he finally lets go and steps away.
Jack walks toward the stage, his heart still pounding but his legs moving steady beneath him. He can feel Quinn and Luke’s eyes on him, your smile burned into the back of his mind. He shakes hands with the commissioner, pulls on the Devils jersey, and lifts the hat onto his head. Cameras flash. The noise swells. His chest is tight again but this time, it’s not nerves. It’s something else. Something warmer.
He looks back toward the floor, toward the row of seats where Quinn, Luke, and you are sitting. You’re still watching him. Your hand rests against your heart. Quinn’s arms are crossed, smiling like he knew this would happen all along. Luke is grinning wide, already pointing toward the Devils logo on Jack’s chest.
Jack breathes out. And this time, he smiles.
After the photos and the handshakes, Jack ushered toward the media pit. Questions are thrown at him from every angle about expectations, about his future with the Devils, about being a franchise player. He answers them as best as he can, his gaze flicking toward the crowd every so often, searching for you. When it’s over, the team staff directs him toward the tunnel, and he barely makes it a few steps before he hears someone yell his name.
“Jack!”
He turns just in time to see you barreling toward him, arms outstretched. Jack’s barely able to brace himself before you crash into his chest, wrapping your arms around his neck. His arms come up automatically, locking around your waist. You’re laughing and crying at the same time, your face buried in his shoulder. Jack breathes out, his chin resting on top of your head.
“You did it,” you whisper.
Jack’s arms tighten around you. “Couldn’t have done it without you.”
“You could’ve,” you mumble, pulling back enough to look at him. “But I’m glad you didn’t.”
Jack’s gaze drops to your mouth. His hands settle at your waist, his thumbs brushing lightly over the hem of your sweater. His chest is still pounding, but this feels steadier somehow. Grounding.
“Hey,” Quinn’s voice cuts in. Jack glances up to see Quinn and Luke standing nearby, Luke practically vibrating with excitement. Quinn’s got that proud but pretending to be casual look on his face.
Luke steps forward first, grinning. “Dude! First overall!” He throws his arms around Jack’s waist, nearly knocking him over. Jack laughs, ruffling Luke’s hair.
“Couldn’t have done it without you either,” Jack says.
Luke pulls back, his smile wide. Quinn rolls his eyes, but his smile doesn’t fade. “Congrats, Jack.” He steps in, pulling Jack into a one armed hug and clapping him on the back. “Knew you had it in you.”
Jack’s throat feels tight. He pulls back and looks between Quinn, Luke, and you. His family. His people. His hand finds yours again, his fingers threading through yours like it’s instinct. Your gaze softens, and Jack feels his heartbeat finally settle.
“Come on,” Quinn says, nodding toward the tunnel. “Let’s go celebrate.”
“Yeah,” Jack says. “Let’s go.”
⟡
It’s been a whirlwind since the draft. Jack signed his contract with the Devils two weeks ago, and now he’s leaving to New Jersey for rookie camp. Jack’s flight to New Jersey is early. Too early. You’re still wrapped in blankets on the couch when he stands in the doorway, a duffel bag slung over his shoulder. His Devils hat is pulled low over his eyes, casting a shadow across his face. His mouth pulls into a thin line as he looks at you, hesitation flickering in his eyes.
“I should get going,” Jack says quietly.
You push yourself up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes as you cross the room toward him. “Are you sure you have everything?”
Jack nods, but his gaze stays on the floor. His hand tightens around the strap of his bag. “Yeah.”
You hesitate for half a second before stepping closer. Your arms wrap around his waist, and Jack exhales sharply as he melts into you. His chin rests on top of your head, and his heartbeat thrums against your cheek.
“I’m gonna miss you,” you murmur.
Jack’s hand slides up your back. “It’s not like we’ve never done long distance before.”
“Yeah, but” You trail off, the words sticking in your throat. It feels different this time. You pull back, your hands lingering on the hem of his hoodie. “Just don’t forget about me when you’re a big NHL star.”
Jack’s mouth twitches. “That’s not gonna happen.”
“You don’t know that.”
Jack’s eyes soften. He leans down, brushing his nose against yours. “I do.”
You smile, even though your chest feels tight. Jack kisses you softly with a lingering brush of lips and then pulls back too soon. His hand stays on your waist for an extra second before he steps away, his expression shifting into something steadier, more composed.
“Call me when you land?” you ask.
Jack’s mouth tugs at the corner. “Always.”
You walk him to the door, watching as he disappears down the driveway and into the early morning light. Your chest feels hollow by the time his car pulls away. The silence that follows is heavier than you expect.
You try to keep busy over the next week spending time with friends, picking up extra shifts but it’s hard to ignore how quiet it feels without Jack around. He calls every night, though, and you fall into a familiar rhythm. Jack fills you in on the details of rookie camp, the fitness tests, the long practices, and the media. He tells you about the other guys, how Nico seems nice, how Bratt’s already chirping at him like they’ve known each other for years. He tells you how much faster the game feels, how much stronger the guys are. You can hear it in his voice, the strain beneath his usual confidence.
“Hard day?” you ask one night, curled up in bed with your phone pressed to your ear.
Jack sighs. “Yeah.”
“Wanna talk about it?” Jack’s quiet for a long moment. “I just don't know. I feel like I’m playing catch up. Like everyone’s two steps ahead.”
“You’ve barely been there for a few days, Jack.”
“I know,” Jack says. “But it’s not supposed to feel this hard.”
“You put too much pressure on yourself.” Jack huffs a soft laugh, but there’s no real humor in it. “It’s kinda hard not to.” You’re quiet for a beat. Then, “You’re not gonna figure it out overnight.”
“I know.”
“But you’ll figure it out. You always do.” Jack doesn’t say anything for a second. Then, quietly, “I hope you’re right.” You close your eyes. “I always am.” Jack’s breath crackles over the line. “Can I call you tomorrow?”
“You don’t have to ask.”
Jack’s quiet for another moment. “I love you and I miss you .”
Your heart clenches. “I miss and love you too.”
Jack sighs softly. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Jack.”
You keep the phone pressed to your ear until the line goes quiet.
Jack calls you after his full day of rookie camp, his voice low and tired through the phone. He sounds exhausted, more than you expected. You’re sitting on the floor of your bedroom, your knees pulled to your chest, the phone pressed to your ear.
“Hey,” Jack says, his voice scratchy. “Hey,” you say softly. “How was it?” Jack exhales a sharp breath. “Brutal.”
“What happened?”
“Fitness testing.” Jack huffs a soft, humorless laugh. “Like the Combine but worse.” You sit up a little straighter. “Worse?”
“Longer. Harder.” Jack’s voice dips lower. “I thought I was ready for it, but I don’t know.” He sounds frustrated, and that’s what gets you. Jack rarely admits when something’s hard.
“You’re gonna be fine,” you say quietly. “I don’t know,” Jack says again. “It’s not just the testing. The practices everyone’s so fast. So strong. I’m trying to keep up, but it feels like I’m a step behind.”
You can almost picture him sprawled across his bed, running a hand through his hair the way he does when he’s stressed. Your chest tightens. “You’ve been there for what five days?”
“ a week.”
“A week” you repeat. “Jack, you need to give yourself some time.”
“I don’t have time,” Jack says. His voice sharpens, the frustration cracking through. “This is the NHL. Everyone’s watching.”
You know that’s true you’ve seen the articles, the highlight reels on social media. It’s a lot for anyone especially for Jack, who’s always carried the weight of expectation like it’s part of his DNA.
“Hey,” you say softly. “You don’t have to figure everything out right away. This isn’t going to be easy it’s not supposed to be. But you wouldn’t be there if you couldn’t handle it.”
Jack’s quiet for a long moment. Then, barely above a whisper: “I don’t know if I can.” You close your eyes, your heart tightening. “Jack.”
“I’m serious,” Jack says. His voice cracks a little at the edges. “What if I’m not as good as everyone thinks I am?”
“You are,” you say immediately. “Jack, you’ve been working toward this your whole life. You belong there.”
“Do I?”
“Yes,” you say. “And if you can’t believe that yet let me believe it for you.” Jack doesn’t answer right away. His breath crackles over the line. “What would I do without you?” You smile faintly, even though your chest aches. “You’d figure it out.”
“Maybe,” Jack says. “But I’m glad I don’t have to.”
Jack starts texting you more after that. Sometimes it’s a quick message in the morning on the ice or a random photo of his new locker with his nameplate above it. Sometimes it’s a rant about drills, or a chirp about one of the guys. Jesper seems to be his favorite target.
Bratt tripped me in practice today. little rat
What'd you do? you text back.
chirped him about his hair
You can’t help but smile. But there are harder messages too.
Bag skate this morning. Thought I was going to pass out.
Coach isn’t happy with me.
Everyone’s so much stronger.
You know Jack doesn’t say these things to anyone else. With the media, with his teammates he’s steady. Confident. But with you he lets the cracks show. And when he calls you late at night, his voice low and rough, you know that’s when he’s feeling it the most.
One night, it’s past midnight when your phone buzzes on your nightstand. You’re half asleep, barely registering the sound until it buzzes again. You squint at the screen. Jack.
“Hey,” you answer, your voice thick with sleep. “Did I wake you?” Jack asks. “No,” you lie. “What’s wrong?”
Jack sighs, and you can hear the tension in it. “Nothing.” You wait. Jack’s quiet for so long you think maybe he’s about to hang up. Then he says, “I just needed to hear your voice.”
You sit up, rubbing at your eyes. “Rough day?”
Jack’s breath catches. “Yeah.”
“What happened?”
Jack’s quiet for another long moment. “Coach ripped into me.”
You frown. “Why?”
“Made a bad play during the scrimmage,” Jack says. “Got caught flat footed on the backcheck. Then I missed the net on a breakaway.”
“That doesn’t sound like you.”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” Jack says. His voice drops lower, almost shaky. “I’m trying. It’s just everything’s so much faster than I expected. I feel like I’m drowning.”
“You’re not,” you say quietly. “You’re adjusting.”
Jack’s breath hitches. “What if I don’t?”
“You will.”
Jack doesn’t answer for a long time. You hear rustling on the other end of the line, like he’s lying down. “I miss you,” he says finally.
Your chest tightens. “I miss you too.”
Jack’s voice gets softer. “Will you stay on the phone with me? Just for a little while?”
You slide down beneath the covers, resting your head against the pillow. “Of course.”
Jack breathes out. “Thanks.”
You don’t say anything after that. Jack’s breathing evens out eventually, and you think he’s starting to fall asleep when you hear him murmur, barely audible “Love you.”
You don’t know if he’s even awake enough to remember saying it. But your heart thuds painfully against your ribs.
“I love you too,” you whisper.
⟡
Jack’s first game in the NHL is at home, and the crowd is louder than he expected. He steps onto the ice at Prudential Center, the Devils logo bright under the lights. The noise is deafening, the kind of sound that hits you square in the chest and for a second it’s hard to breathe. His legs feel shaky as he skates through warmups, the ice cutting beneath his skates with every push. The energy is electric, but it���s not enough to drown out the knot in his chest. He knows everyone’s watching him, the first overall pick, the franchise’s future. He tries not to think about it but it’s impossible to ignore the weight of it.
You’re watching from Michigan. The game’s on TV in your room, your laptop balanced on your knees. Jack looks smaller on the screen somehow swallowed up by the bright lights and the size of the arena. He’s wearing number 86, and it still feels surreal seeing it on an NHL jersey. He’s buzzing with nerves you can tell by the way he’s gripping his stick too tightly during warmups. He’s always done that when he’s nervous.
Jack texts you after warmups while the Zamboni is still clearing the ice. “Starting on the second line. My hands are shaking.”
You smile, already typing back. “You’ve got this. Just play your game.”
Jack’s response comes quickly. “I feel like I’m going to throw up.”
“You won’t.” You pause before adding, “But maybe don’t sit next to Nico if you do.”
A minute passes before the dots appear again. “Not funny.”
“A little funny.”
Jack doesn’t respond, but the small, shaky smile he gives the camera when it passes by his bench tells you he saw it.
The game itself is rough. Jack looks fast, quick on his feet, but the Devils’ offense struggles to keep up. He gets knocked down hard in the first period, bouncing off the boards and coming up wincing. He pushes through it, but you can tell he’s frustrated the way he shakes his head after a shift, the way he skates to the bench with his head down. The Devils lose 4-1, and Jack finishes with a minus-two rating. His line gets hemmed in the defensive zone more than once, and even though it’s just one game, the postgame interviews are already talking about whether he can handle the league’s size and speed.
He calls you after the game, his voice flat. “That sucked.”
“You knew it wasn’t going to be easy,” you say softly.
“I didn’t think it would be this bad,” Jack mutters. He sighs, and you can hear the exhaustion in his voice. “I was minus-two. Do you know how bad that is?”
“Jack”
“Everyone’s already talking about it,” he cuts you off. His voice tightens, the frustration bubbling to the surface. “I can’t screw this up” He trails off, his breath shaky.
“You’re not screwing anything up,” you say firmly. “It’s one game.”
“It’s not just one game.” Jack exhales through his nose, and you can hear the tension in it. “This is what I’ve been working toward my whole life. And what if I’m not good enough?”
You close your eyes, pressing your forehead to your hand. “Jack. You are good enough. You belong here.”
Jack’s quiet for a moment. “Yeah,” he says eventually. But he doesn’t sound like he believes it.
The first few weeks are more of the same. Jack gets pushed around a lot, the physicality wearing on him. He’s getting hit hard, knocked off the puck more than he’s used to. He’s fast, but the guys he’s playing against are bigger, more experienced. He’s trying, you can see it but it’s not coming together the way he wants it to.
Your phone buzzes constantly after games. Jack’s name lights up the screen with texts “Minus-three. Fucking embarrassing.” “I can’t score.” “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.”
You try to reassure him, but the losses are piling up. The Devils are 0-4-2 to start the season, and Jack’s still scoreless. The media’s already running with it headlines about whether he was overhyped, if he’s too small for the league. Jack tries to brush it off, but you know it’s getting to him.
It’s late one night when he calls you, his voice quiet. “I don’t know how to fix this.” You sit up in bed, clutching the phone to your ear. “You will.”
Jack doesn’t say anything for a while. “I just” He sighs. “I miss you.”
Your chest tightens. “I miss you too.”
Jack’s breath hitches. “I hate it here,” he says quietly.
Your eyes burn. “I know.”
“I don’t know how to do this without you.”
“You’re not doing this without me,” you whisper.
Jack’s quiet for a long time. His breathing is steady in your ear. Eventually, he says, “I just want to come home.”
You close your eyes, swallowing down the ache in your chest. “I know,” you say softly. “But you can’t.”
Jack doesn’t answer, but you know he’s still there. After a while, his breathing evens out, and you realize he’s fallen asleep on the line. You stay there for a while, the phone pressed to your ear, listening to his quiet breathing.
Jack finally scores his first goal two weeks into the season, a breakaway against Vancouver. Quinn’s on the ice when it happens, and you see the way Quinn hugs him against the glass after the puck crosses the line. Jack looks lighter for a moment, his smile big and bright, but it fades quickly after the game ends. The Devils still lost 5-2.
He calls you that night, and he sounds more tired than happy. “It doesn’t matter if we keep losing,” Jack mutters.
“Yes, it does,” you say. “Jack, you scored. That’s huge.”
Jack sighs. “Yeah.” He’s quiet for a second before adding, “Quinn said you screamed when it went in.”
You laugh. “Maybe.”
Jack’s breath softens. “I miss you.”
Your heart squeezes. “I miss you too.”
Jack’s quiet for a long time before he says, “I don’t know how long I can keep doing this.”
You don’t know how to answer that. So you don’t.
⟡
Jack’s rookie season should’ve been exciting. It should’ve been everything he’s worked for. Instead, it’s November, and the Devils are on a six-game losing streak. Jack’s gone nine games without a goal, and the media’s not holding back. Every headline is brutal. Every post game interview is worse. He’s not smiling as much anymore. He’s quiet when you call, sometimes too tired to even talk. And when you visit, it feels like he’s somewhere else entirely.
The last time you saw him in person was two weeks ago. You’d flown from Michigan to see him play in Newark the first time you’d been able to since the season started. Jack had barely looked at you when you met him outside the locker room. His face was tight, his eyes tired. He’d hugged you, but it was quick. Impersonal. And when you sat with his family during the game, you saw the tension in his shoulders, the way he carried himself on the ice like the weight of it all was pressing down too hard. He’d been the last one off the ice after the loss, his head down, his mouth pulled tight.
He called you that night late, when you were already back at the hotel and apologized. “I just I’m sorry I couldn’t see you more,” Jack had said, his voice low. He’d sounded exhausted. “I’m just tired.”
Now, it’s almost midnight again, and you’re staring at your phone, waiting for him to call. He hasn’t. You’ve texted twice with no answer. You know he’s probably at home by now, maybe asleep. Or maybe not. He’s started turning his phone off after games. Less noise, he’d said. Less pressure. But you don’t know if it’s helping.
It’s hard to know what to say when you do talk to him. When he tells you he’s doing fine, even though you can hear it in his voice that he isn’t. When he tells you, “I’ll figure it out,” even though you can see him unraveling.
The next morning, you call him before class. He answers on the third ring, his voice rough with sleep. “Hey,” he says.
“Hey,” you say softly. “You okay?”
Jack sighs. You can hear the sound of him rubbing a hand over his face. “Yeah. Just tired.”
“You’ve been saying that a lot.”
Jack’s quiet for a long time. “Yeah.”
You sit down on the edge of your bed, clutching the phone a little tighter. “Jack”
“I’m fine,” he says quickly. Too quickly.
“You’re not,” you say gently. “You don’t have to-”
“I said I’m fine,” Jack cuts in. His tone is sharper than you’ve ever heard it.
You go quiet. Jack exhales. “Sorry,” he mutters. “I just don't know.”
“It’s okay,” you say softly.
Jack doesn’t say anything for a while. You can hear his breathing over the line, steady but heavy. Finally, he speaks again, his voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know how to fix this.”
You swallow the lump in your throat. “You don’t have to fix it alone.”
Jack doesn’t answer. And after a while, the line goes quiet.
The next time you talk to Jack, it’s after another loss. This time to Toronto. Another night of him leaving the rink without a point. Another night of reporters asking him what’s wrong, why he isn’t producing.
“I’m trying,” Jack says, his voice tight. “I’m trying and it’s not, it's not working.”
“I know,” you say softly. “But it’s not your fault. It’s a team-”
“I don’t care if it’s a team thing,” Jack snaps. “I’m the first pick. I’m supposed to be the one fixing it.”
“Jack-”
“I have to be better.” His voice cracks. “I just I don’t know how.”
Your heart aches. You want to reach through the phone and pull him into you. Hold him until the tension melts away. But you can’t. You’re too far away. And Jack’s already starting to pull back.
“You’re not alone im with you,” you say quietly.
Jack doesn’t answer.
You hear him breathe out. Then the call ends.
The worst part is that you don’t know how to help him. Jack’s not letting you in the way he used to. And you can feel it the distance growing between you, like something fraying at the edges. You want to fix it. You want to be enough to hold him together.But Jack’s starting to slip through your fingers.
⟡
After a while, you notice that not only jack started to drift from you, but also your relationship with him. It starts with the little things.
The missed calls. The delayed replies. The way Jack’s voice sounds a little too thin over the phone, his laugh not quite reaching the places it usually does. He’s tired you can hear it even when he tries to hide it.
At first, you don’t think much of it. Jack’s schedule is brutal, and it’s not like he’s never missed a call before. But then it starts happening more often. You’ll text him after a game Proud of you, call me when you can? and it’ll sit there for hours. Sometimes until the next day. Or he’ll call you late, hours after he said he would, with a rushed apology and a tired “I’m sorry, babe. I just passed out after practice.”
You get it. You do. He’s in the middle of his rookie season, grinding through the hardest stretch of hockey he’s ever played, and he’s under more pressure than he’ll ever admit. But that doesn’t make it sting any less when you see his name light up your phone after midnight and realize you’ve already given up hope of hearing from him that night.
Or when you do pick up, and it’s not the Jack you’re used to hearing.
“Hey,” you say softly, curling up under the covers. “You okay?”
Jack’s voice is thin over the line. “Yeah. Just tired.”
He always says that. Just tired. Even when it sounds like more than that.
“You played well tonight,” you offer. “Had that sick pass in the second.”
Jack’s breath crackles faintly through the speaker. “Didn’t matter. We still lost.”
“It’s not on you.”
Jack hums. You can picture the way he’s probably lying there head buried in the pillow, hand resting over his face, the line of his jaw tight. He’s always been hard on himself. But lately, it's gotten worse.
The games aren’t going well. The media’s been tearing into him —first overall pick and only four goals? The disappointment in the headlines is almost palpable. You’ve stopped reading the articles, but you know Jack hasn’t. He doesn’t talk about it, but you can tell from the way he’s quieter now. The way his texts have dwindled from paragraphs to one word answers.
The last time you FaceTimed, Jack barely looked at you. He was lying in bed, hair damp from his post-game shower, and you could see the crease between his brows even when he wasn’t talking. You tried to make him smile made a dumb joke about how you’d start training to become the Devils' new enforcer but all you got was a faint chuckle and, “Sorry, I’m just-”
“Tired,” you’d finished for him, and Jack had sighed, rubbing his hand over his face.
It’s been like this for a while now. He’s slipping or maybe you’re the one slipping away. You don’t know how to fix it when Jack’s over 600 miles away, and every conversation feels like trying to grasp sand in your hands the harder you try to hold on, the faster it slips through your fingers.
You’re curled up in bed now, phone pressed to your ear as Jack’s voice filters through the speaker.
“It was bad,” Jack says. His voice is quiet. Defeated. “I just I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
You sit up a little, pushing back the tight feeling in your chest. “Jack, it’s not you. The whole team’s struggling right now.”
“Yeah, but” He cuts himself off. You can hear the frustrated exhale on the other end. “I should be better. I was the first overall pick I’m supposed to make a difference.”
“You are making a difference,” you say gently. “It’s your rookie year. No one expects you to carry the team.”
Jack’s silent for a beat too long.
You squeeze your eyes shut. “Jack?”
“Yeah,” he says, but his voice sounds distant. “I know.”
You hesitate. “Do you, though?”
His breath hitches. “I just I don’t know. Feels like I’m trying, but nothing’s working. And people are starting to talk, you know? About how maybe I wasn’t ready, maybe I’m not”
“Jack,” you cut in. “Stop.”
He doesn’t respond.
“You’re not a mistake,” you say, because you know that’s what he’s thinking. “You deserve to be there. You worked your ass off for this.”
“I guess.”
“Not ‘I guess,’” you press. “Jack, you”
“I know,” he snaps, and the sharpness of it cuts through the space between you. You freeze, swallowing the knot in your throat. Jack exhales shakily. His voice softens. “Sorry. I’m just tired.”
You force a small smile even though he can’t see it. “You’re allowed to be tired.”
“Yeah,” Jack says, but it doesn’t sound like he believes it.
Another stretch of silence presses down between you. You wait for Jack to fill it, but he doesn’t.
“You want me to stay on the phone with you?” you ask quietly.
Jack’s quiet for a second. “No its okay”
“I’ll stay”
“Okay.”
So you stay. Jack doesn’t say much after that. You can hear the rustle of his comforter as he shifts around, settling into bed. His breathing starts to even out. You stay awake longer than you probably should, listening to the soft sound of him breathing on the other end of the line, wondering how much longer you’ll be able to reach him like this.
Because lately, even when he’s right there, yet he feels so far away.
⟡
It’s been months of missed calls, delayed texts, and half-hearted conversations. Jack’s always tired. Or busy. Or distracted. And when you do talk, it’s like he’s only halfway there like some part of him is already pulling away. You’ve tried not to read into it, tried to convince yourself it’s just the pressure of his rookie season, that things will settle once he finds his rhythm. But deep down, you know better. It’s not just hockey. It’s him. It’s you. It’s the quiet space growing between you, the way it stretches wider with every unanswered text and every empty conversation.
So you book a flight to New Jersey because you need to know if this is still something you can save or if you lost him completely
DAY ONE
The cab ride from the airport to Jack’s apartment is quiet. Too quiet. The city outside the window passes in a blur of gray and headlights, but you don’t really see it. Your phone sits heavy in your lap, the screen dark except for the faint reflection of the passing streetlights. You tap your thumb against the side of it like you're expecting a message that you know isn’t coming. Jack texted you earlier to confirm he’d be home when you arrived, but that was three hours ago. No follow-up. No “Can’t wait to see you.” No little heart emoji like he used to send.
It’s not that he’s ignoring you at least, not outright. He’s busy, you’ve told yourself a hundred times over the last few weeks. Rookie season is demanding. New city, new team, new pressure. He’s adjusting. You should understand that. And you do. You swear you do. But understanding it doesn’t make the silence feel any less heavy.
When the cab pulls up in front of Jack’s building, you hesitate for a second before stepping out. You’re not sure why it’s not like you’ve never been here before but the weight sitting low in your stomach makes it hard to breathe. The driver sets your bag on the curb, and you force yourself to pick it up, shoulders tensing under the weight of it as you walk toward the entrance.
Jack opens the door when you knock. He’s in a plain Devils hoodie and sweatpants, his hair damp like he just showered. He smiles, but it’s thin, barely reaching his eyes.
“Hey,” he says. His voice is soft, like he's already tired.
You smile, forcing brightness into your voice. “Hey.”
Jack leans down to kiss you, but it’s brief. Quick. Like he’s already pulling away before it starts. His hand finds the small of your back and guides you into the apartment, but it drops as soon as the door closes behind you.
The apartment looks the same cleaner than you expected, probably because Ellen came to visit last week but it feels off. Like someone came through and rearranged all the furniture just enough to make you notice. Jack’s shoes are in a neat row by the door. There’s a half empty coffee mug sitting on the counter. His phone is face down on the couch.
Jack sits down on the couch, leaving a noticeable gap beside him. You sit too, trying to close it, but he doesn’t shift toward you.
“So,” you start, your voice too bright, too forced, “how was practice today?”
“Fine.”
Your stomach twists. “Just fine?”
Jack shrugs, eyes fixed on the muted TV. “Yeah.”
You watch him for a second, the sharp line of his jaw and the way his hand rests against his knee. Normally, he'd have his arm around you by now. Normally, you’d be tangled together and he’d be rambling about plays and drills and how Nico wouldn’t stop chirping him today.
But he’s quiet. Detached.
And you’re hyper aware of the space between you.
Jack reaches for the remote and starts flipping through channels. His brows furrowed in concentration, but he’s not really watching anything. It’s like his body is here, but the rest of him is somewhere else.
“Hungry?” he asks after a minute.
“Yeah, I could eat.”
“Cool.” He stands. “I’ll order something.”
And that’s it. He disappears into the kitchen without asking what you want. A minute later, you hear the soft murmur of his voice on the phone.
You sit there, your heart beating loud in your ears, and wonder why it feels like you’ve already lost him.
Jack comes back a few minutes later and drops onto the couch, his knee brushing against yours for half a second before he shifts away.
“Food should be here in, like, twenty minutes,” he says.
You nod. “okay”
More silence. The TV hums in the background, the flicker of light reflecting off Jack’s face. You glance at him, hoping he’ll look over at you, but his gaze stays fixed on the screen. His hand is resting between his knees, his fingers pulling at a loose thread in the fabric of his sweatpants.
You clear your throat. “Did you, um talk to Quinn today he was asking me about you?”
Jack’s mouth tightens. “Yeah.”
“And?”
“He’s good.”
You wait for him to elaborate, but he doesn’t. The seconds stretch out between you, long and tense and uncomfortable.
“Jack.” You lean toward him, lowering your voice. “What’s going on?” Jack’s jaw twitches. “Nothing.”
“It doesn’t feel like nothing.”
Jack sighs, running a hand through his hair. “It’s just been a long week.”
You search his face, the dark circles under his eyes, the faint crease in his forehead and you know he’s not lying. But you also know he’s not telling you the whole truth.
“You know you can talk to me, right?” you say, your voice soft.
Jack’s gaze flickers toward you, and for a second, you see it the familiar warmth, the quiet vulnerability you’ve always known how to reach. His eyes soften, and he looks like he might actually say something.
But then the buzzer for the front door sounds, and the moment evaporates.
Jack stands quickly. “That’s the food.”
You watch him cross the room, feeling the distance stretch wider with every step.
He comes back with a brown takeout bag, setting it on the coffee table before sitting down. He opens the bag and pulls out containers of food sushi, not your favorite and hands you a pair of chopsticks without looking at you.
You stare down at the food. “Did you know what I wanted?”
Jack hesitates. “I just ordered something quick.”
Your chest tightens. Jack always knows what you want. He knows you like avocado rolls, not spicy tuna. He knows you like extra soy sauce on the side and that you don’t like wasabi. But tonight, it’s like he didn’t even think about it.
You pick at the sushi, appetite gone. Jack eats quietly, his eyes back on the TV. The sound of the game commentator fills the air, too loud, pressing into your skull.
After a few minutes, Jack stands and starts cleaning up. He takes your barely touched container and tosses it in the trash without a word.
“I’m gonna shower,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck.
“Oh. Okay.”
Jack hesitates in the doorway. His eyes flick toward you, and for a second, you think he might come back, sit down, pull you into his arms, tell you he’s just tired and that everything is fine.
But he doesn’t. He disappears down the hall, and a minute later, you hear the sound of the shower running.
You sit there, hands clasped in your lap, listening to the water hit the tile. Your heart feels too big and too small at the same time, pressing against the walls of your chest.
Jack’s phone buzzes on the table, and you glance at it. A text from Nico lights up the screen:
Good skate today.
You stare at the message for a long time.
The shower runs in the background, and you sit alone on the couch, feeling the emptiness stretch out around you.
DAY TWO
Jack sleeps with his back to you.
It’s not the first time, but it feels different tonight. Final. His side of the bed feels miles away, the sheets cool and untouched where his body should be. You lie there for a long time, staring at the ceiling, listening to the sound of his breathing. It’s shallow, restless. Every few minutes, he shifts, the mattress dipping under his weight.
You think about reaching for him, curling up into his side like you always do. Your hand twitches under the blanket, fingers itching to brush over his back, to anchor yourself to the steady rhythm of his breathing. But something stops you. Fear, maybe or just the quiet certainty that if you reach for him, he’ll pull away.
So you stay still, the space between you cold and unforgiving.
You wake up sometime in the middle of the night to find him half hanging off the edge of the bed, his face turned toward the wall. His arm is curled beneath his head, his breathing uneven. You watch the rise and fall of his back, the way his shoulders tense even in sleep. He’s not resting, not really.
You swallow hard and sit up slightly, brushing your hair away from your face. For a second, you think about touching him, coaxing him back toward you. But you don’t. You can’t.
In the morning, Jack wakes up first. You know this because you hear him moving around the apartment while you lie there, eyes closed, hoping he’ll come back to bed. He doesn’t.
Instead, you hear the distant sound of water running in the bathroom, the clink of glass in the kitchen. The low hum of the TV. You press your face into the pillow and try to breathe through the tightness in your chest.
When you finally get up, Jack’s sitting at the kitchen counter with a protein shake. He’s already dressed in workout gear Devils issued shorts and a long-sleeve shirt that fits snug around his arms. His hair is damp, curling slightly at the ends. He glances up when you enter the room.
“Morning,” you say, your voice coming out softer than you meant.
“Hey.”
You sit across from him, pulling your knees up and wrapping your arms around them. Jack’s gaze flickers toward you briefly, then drops back down to his protein shake. He spins the cup slowly in his hands, condensation trailing down the side.
You try to find his eyes. “Sleep okay?”
Jack nods, distracted. He taps his thumb against the edge of the cup. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
“Mmhmm.” His gaze darts toward the window.
You glance at the clock on the microwave. “What time’s practice?”
“Ten.”
“You want to grab coffee after?”
Jack hesitates. His shoulders tighten. “I don’t know. We’ve got media stuff later.”
“Oh.”
You feel stupid for asking.
Jack stands and rinses out his cup in the sink. His back is to you, but you see the tension in his shoulders. He’s holding it all in the pressure, the frustration, the weight of everything this year has asked of him. Normally, he’d tell you about it. He’d talk through it, let you hold it with him for a little while.
But now it feels like he’s trying to keep the distance intact.
“You okay?” you ask quietly.
“Yeah.”
“Jack.”
He sighs and rubs a hand over his face. When he speaks, his voice is tight. “It’s just a lot right now.”
You nod, even though he’s not looking at you.
Jack’s hand curls over the edge of the counter. His knuckles turn white for half a second before he exhales and grabs his keys from the hook by the door.
“I’ll see you later, okay?” His tone is light too light. Like he’s trying to make this feel normal.
You sit up straighter. “We could go out tonight. Dinner or something.”
Jack pauses with his hand on the handle. His eyes flick toward you, guarded. “Yeah. We’ll figure something out.”
Then he’s gone.
The door clicks shut behind him, and the quiet of the apartment closes in around you.
You sit there for a long time, staring at the spot where he stood. The sunlight spills in through the thin curtains, cutting pale lines across the hardwood floor. You think about the way he used to kiss you in the mornings, sleepy and warm, his hand curled over the back of your neck. You think about the way he used to tug you into his chest after a restless night, murmuring sleepy nonsense into your hair.
And then you think about last night about the empty side of the bed and the quiet wall of his back facing you.
Your phone buzzes on the table. You grab it quickly, your heart leaping in your chest. But it’s not Jack. It’s a text from quinn
"Hope you’re having a good time! How’s Jack?"
You stare at the message for a long moment before typing back:
"Good. Everything’s good."
The lie tastes bitter on your tongue.
You sit there for a while longer, the phone still in your hand, before pushing yourself to your feet. You grab the half-empty protein shake Jack left on the counter and dump it down the sink. The hum of the refrigerator fills the silence.
It’s only nine o’clock, but it feels later. Your eyes drift toward the bedroom the sheets still rumpled from sleep and you wonder if you should crawl back into bed and wait for him to come home.
But you know better.
Instead, you curl up on the couch and pull the blanket over your legs. Jack’s sweatshirt is draped over the arm of the couch, and you pull it onto your lap, bunching the sleeves in your hands. It smells like his laundry detergent and something warmer, more familiar.
you press your face into the fabric and close your eyes, trying to remember the last time he held you like he meant it.
You think about how he used to look at you and really look at you like you were the only thing in the room that mattered.
But that was months ago. Now, when Jack looks at you, it’s like he’s looking through you. Or worse like he’s already decided what happens next.
Your phone buzzes again. This time, it’s Jack.
“Practice ran long. Gonna be late.”
You type out a quick response "Okay." but don’t hit send right away.
Instead, you sit there with the message glowing on the screen, wondering when it started feeling like this. Like you’re holding onto something that’s already slipping away.
DAY THREE
It was worse the next day. The air felt thicker, like it was weighing down every conversation. Jack seemed distracted, his gaze always drifting toward his phone or the TV. When you asked if he wanted to grab lunch, he hesitated for a second before saying, "Yeah, sure," like he was doing you a favor.
At lunch, he kept glancing around, not meeting your eyes. You watched him scroll through his phone between bites of his sandwich. You tapped your nails against the table.
"Jack."
"Hmm?" His eyes didn’t lift from his phone.
"Can you put that down?"
He sighed but set the phone face down. "Okay."
You wanted to ask if he even wanted you here. You wanted to ask why he wasn’t looking at you like he used to, why you felt like a ghost in his apartment. But you swallowed it all down and smiled when Jack forced another conversation about hockey that you could barely focus on.
That night, he sat at the edge of the bed, scrolling on his phone again while you sat behind him. You reached out, resting a hand on his back. He tensed.
"Are you okay?" you asked.
"Yeah," he said quickly.
"You don’t seem like it."
"I’m fine, okay?" His tone was sharp. He stood up and walked toward the bathroom without looking back.
You stared at the empty space he left behind.
DAY FOUR
You woke up before Jack.
He was lying on his stomach, face half-buried in the pillow, hair sticking up in every direction. You watched him for a moment, chest rising and falling steadily. He looked peaceful like this like the Jack you used to know. The Jack who used to roll over and pull you into his arms the second he woke up.
You shifted closer, brushing your hand over his back. His skin was warm under your fingertips. He stirred, groaning softly into the pillow.
"Morning," you whispered.
Jack’s eyes fluttered open. He blinked at you sleepily, then rubbed a hand over his face. "Morning."
You smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to his bare shoulder. He didn’t react. Just sat up and ran a hand through his hair.
"What time is it?"
"Almost nine."
Jack nodded, already swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "I should get going soon."
"Going where?I thought you had today off"
Jack stood, stretching. "I do, I'm just going to go workout with some of the guys."
"Oh." You sat up, the sheets pooling around your waist. "Can I come?"
Jack paused, looking at you over his shoulder. "I mean it’s just going to be boring."
"I don’t care."
Jack hesitated. "I think we’re just gonna grab lunch after. Probably end up hanging out at Nico’s."
You bit the inside of your cheek. "So you don’t want me there?"
Jack’s gaze darted to the floor. "It’s not that."
"Then what is it?"
Jack sighed. "I don’t know. Just feels like a guys' thing, you know?"
You swallowed. "Right."
Jack’s phone buzzed on the nightstand. He grabbed it, checking the screen. A faint smile tugged at his mouth.
"Who is it?" you asked.
“Nico," Jack said, texting back quickly. He tossed his phone onto the bed, already moving toward the bathroom.
You sat there for a moment, heart sinking.
"I’ll be back later," Jack called over his shoulder.
"Cool," you murmured. But Jack had already closed the door behind him.
You sat there for a long time, listening to the shower running.
When Jack got back that afternoon, you were curled up on the couch, knees pulled to your chest. He walked in, tossed his keys onto the counter, and sat down across from you. He scrolled through his phone without saying anything.
You watched him for a moment.
"How was it?" you asked.
"Hmm?"
"Your workout."
Jack shrugged. "Good."
"Anything else?"
Jack didn’t look up. "Nope."
Your jaw tightened.
You shifted closer, resting a hand on his arm. "Jack."
He tensed. "What?"
You hated how sharp his voice sounded. Like you were annoying him.
"Do you want to do something tonight?" you asked quietly.
Jack sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "I don’t know. I’m kind of tired."
"Oh."
Jack’s gaze flicked toward you. "What?"
"Nothing," you said quickly, even though it wasn’t nothing.
Jack’s phone buzzed again. He picked it up without hesitation. You sat there, heart sinking as he smiled at the screen. He didn’t even notice the way your hand fell away from his arm.
And that’s when it hit you.
You weren’t the person he wanted to talk to anymore.
You weren’t the person who made him smile like that anymore.
You took a breath, swallowing hard. "Jack."
"Hmm?"
You sat up straighter, heart hammering painfully against your ribs. "Do you even want me here?"
Jack’s head jerked toward you, brows furrowing. "What kind of question is that?"
"You’re barely looking at me." Your voice cracked. "You don’t talk to me. When you do, it feels like you’re trying to get through it so you can go back to your phone. Just say it if you don’t want me here."
Jack’s jaw tightened. "Jesus, you’re making this a bigger deal than it is."
"A bigger deal?" you echoed. Your voice sharpened. "Jack, I flew to new jersey to see you. I’m trying so hard to hold this together, but you’re not even meeting me halfway. If you don’t want this anymore, just"
"I didn’t ask you to come."
You froze.
Jack’s eyes widened, but the words were already out there.
Your heart hammered in your chest. "What?"
"I didn’t ask you to come," he repeated, softer this time. His gaze fell to the floor. "You decided to."
You blinked hard, your throat tightening painfully. "Wow."
Jack ran a hand through his hair, exhaling hard. "I didn’t mean it like that"
"You did."
Jack’s mouth opened, but no words came out.
You stood up, shaking. "I can't, I can't do this anymore."
Jack’s head snapped toward you. "What does that mean?"
"It means I’m done." Your voice broke, but you kept going. "I’m tired of feeling like I’m the only one fighting for this. If you’re not going to try, then why am I even here?"
Jack’s eyes darkened. "So that’s it? You’re giving up?"
You laughed bitterly. "You gave up first."
Jack’s mouth twisted. "Right. So now it’s my fault?"
"You know what?" you said, your breath shaking. "Yeah. It is."
Jack stood up, his eyes hard now. "Fine. If you want to go, then go."
"That’s it?" You took a step toward him, tears blurring your vision. "You’re not even going to try to stop me?"
Jack’s eyes flashed. "What do you want me to say? That I miss you? That I love you? You already know that, but it’s not enough, is it?"
"It’s not enough if you’re not going to show it!" you shot back. "You say you love me, but you act like I’m just here. Like I don’t matter."
Jack’s expression darkened. "Yeah? Well, maybe you don’t."
You sucked in a sharp breath.
Jack’s face paled instantly. "I—"
"No." You shook your head, tears spilling down your cheeks. "You said it. And you know what? Maybe you’re right."
"Don’t twist this"
"I’m not twisting anything! I’m done!" Your voice cracked, but you held your ground. "I’m not going to sit here and beg for you to care about me. I deserve better than that."
Jack’s jaw flexed.
Your breath hitched. You waited for him to take it back to tell you to stay. But Jack just stood there, eyes stormy, hands clenched into fists at his sides.
You nodded slowly. "Okay."
You grabbed your bag from the floor. Jack didn’t say anything as you walked toward the door. Your hand trembled as you opened it.
You hesitated. Just for a second.
"Bye, Jack," you whispered.
Jack didn’t reply.
You closed the door behind you.
The flight home feels like a blur. You don’t cry at least not yet but the numbness sets in as soon as the plane takes off. Jack didn’t text you before you boarded. He didn’t call. He didn’t say anything after the door shut behind you.
You stare out the window, watching the clouds blur beneath you, but your chest feels hollow. Four years. Gone in a single weekend. Your friendship since you were 10 of growing up together, of loving each other through every awkward phase and milestone shattered in one conversation.
You scroll through your phone without really seeing it. His contact sits at the top of your recent messages, the last one marked as read. I’m sorry. He hasn’t sent anything since.
And honestly, you don’t expect him to.
Your phone vibrates, and for half a second your heart leaps. But it’s just your mom, checking in. You let the message sit unopened and slide your phone facedown on the tray table.
When you get home, everything feels wrong. Your room looks the same, but it’s too quiet. No FaceTime calls from Jack lighting up your phone. No goodnight texts. No “Miss you” or “Wish you were here.” The absence is deafening.
You lie in bed that night, scrolling through old pictures, ones from Vancouver, from Michigan, from all those summers at the lake house. Jack’s smile frozen in time. Your hand in his. Quinn and Luke in the background, laughing at something Jack had said.
Your chest tightens.
You think about how easy it used to be how you could sit in silence for hours and still feel connected. How you could tell what Jack was thinking just from a look. How his hand would instinctively find yours without either of you thinking about it.
But somewhere along the way, you both stopped reaching for each other. Mostly him.
Your phone buzzes again. This time, it’s Quinn.
“You okay?”
Your thumbs hover over the keyboard, but you don’t know how to answer that.
“Yeah. Just tired.”
Quinn’s reply comes quickly. “Jack didn’t mean it.”
Your breath catches. A hollow feeling sinks deeper into your chest.
You don’t answer.
Because the worst part is maybe he did.
#hockey imagine#hockey fic#nhl imagine#nhl fanfiction#nhl fic#jack hughes#jack hughes imagine#jack hughes x reader#jack hughes x y/n#jack hughes fic#nj devils#njd fic#hockey x reader#new jersey devils#hughes brothers
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So my Batfamily brain rot is back (not that it ever really left) and I just had a thought like…
If you’re a henchman/criminal in Gotham, seeing your life flash past your eyes is gonna be a somewhat regular occurance but… what if like… the thing that truly made a henchman’s heart fall to his ass was when they hit Robin just a little too hard and this 10 year old kid just starts crying and goes ‘Daaaaaadddd!’
That’s the moment when they truly think they’re going to die because said dad, the kid is calling for is a 6’6 demon from hell who’s all muscle and shadows and vengance and a lot of Gotham still thinks he’s a cryptid
The henchmen all drop their guns and try to calm the kid down but it’s over in 5 seconds flat. Batman breaks several bones before speaking to Robin in the softest voice they’ve ever heard him use and the criminal world, who was already a bit hesitant to fight a kid have even more reason to take it just a little easy on Robin.
And like, I can picture different reactions with every Robin.
Like, for Dick, he’s ten and we all know he was the most violent Robin second only to Damian so maybe when he’s ten or eleven and has calmed down a little, a henchback who still remembers what a little shit he used to be decides to get back at Robin, slips on a pair of brass knuckles and BAM
And then, little Dick just stares for a moment in shock, cheek already starting to bruise, the criminals he’d been fighting all stay still because it was a nasty punch and then…
“Daaaaad!!!” He cries out in a whiny voice that reminds them that Robin really is just a kid and it all clicks into place.
Even Bruce wasn’t expecting that, Dick has just started calling him dad and he still isn’t used to being called that so to hear his kid calling for him in the moment where he is startled and hurt and a little scared… the henchmen don’t even have time to react and they wake up in the hospital with concussions and maybe a few broken bones.
It doesn’t take Dick long to calm down, it was mostly that the hit from a random henchmen really startled him and got him right in the cheekbone. But Bruce still finishes patrol early and Dick still hides under Bruce’s cape all the way to the Batmobile.
Then comes Jason and Jason was such a sweet kid, I headcannon he was the one that called Bruce dad the most often while being Robin. So one night during patrol maybe he finds himself fighting Penguin or Two-Face and it’s been a long night and he has an exam the following day and Bruce is fighting another villain at the other side of the warehouse
The point is, the henchmen and Two-Face start landing hits on eleven year old Jason in his gut and at some point he loses sight of Batman fighting on the other side of the room. Jason gets scared because he’s never really fought without Batman and while he knows that Bruce is still in the warehouse, he can’t see him and the handle of a gun hits the back of his ankle and he falls and he sees Two-Face or Penguin or one of the henchmen getting ready to grab the front of his uniform and beat him up and…
“Daaaaddd!”
The criminals freeze for a moment. They’ve heard the stories of what happened the last time a Robin called scared for dad.
They’re fucked.
They all drop their guns and try to get Jason to calm down, but he’s crying just a little bit and calls again, his voice breaking and despite having been at the other side of the warehouse just a second ago, Bruce somehow drops from the ceiling and it’s over before the criminals can keep pleading with Robin to calm down.
Jason tries to apologize for ‘acting like a baby’ but Bruce is having none of it and carries him back to the Batmobile and Jason is happy to just hide his face in Bruce’s cape because he knows his dad will always be there to save him.
Then comes Tim.
And Tim gets found out while doing reconnisance and somehow he finds himself face to face with Bane who manages to wrench away his bo staff and Tim is just eleven and he is scared because Bane doesn’t look like he’s going to hold back
All Tim knows is that the crack he hears must surely be his ribs either cracking or breaking and he can’t breath and he can only muster enough air for a single word… and he calls for his dad through tears and fear
And at this point… at this point Batman has already lost a Robin, Tim may not be his legally but he is his son just as much as Jason was
Bane spends a month in the ICU
Tim is embarrased that he reacted like that. He thinks it makes him less of a Robin to called scared for Batman… for dad.
So Bruce tells him of the other two times it happened. It’s one of the first times he’s spoken about Jason to Tim so bluntly.
Then comes Stephanie.
Stephanie never calls Bruce dad when she’s Robin. She’s not his daughter and he’s not her dad. They’re not sure what exactly they are to one another.
As far as Bruce knows, Stephanie’s version of Robin never called out to him when she was scared.
What he doesn’t know is that it did happen. Just once
It was the last time she was Robin. When Black Mask had her and she thought she was going to die
At some point while bleeding and feeling nauseous and so scared she could barely hear anything that wasn’t her own heart beating wildly against her chest… she called for dad. Not for Arthur Brown, but for Bruce
Black Mask laughed at her
Stephanie never tells Bruce
And finally… Damian
Now, we know Damian would probably never be startled enough to call for Bruce out of instinct, so I can see 2 scenarios in which this could happen.
First, he sees another kid do it. He sees a kid close to his own age laughing and playing, then tripping and staying quiet for a split second before crying out for mom and dad and he just… assumes that’s something kids do when scared and hurt and startled and does it mostly in an attempt to be a little more ‘normal’
Or, my favorite scenario… he hears of the other times it has happened. He overhears maybe Dick remind Jason of what Bruce did when Jason called out to dad as Robin. Tim maybe jokes that a Robin calling for dad is still the villains’ greatest fear
So Damian stores that knowledge away as a battle strategy just in case he ever needs it… and maybe a small part of him wants to put it to the test, to see if his father would protect him as brutally as he’s protected the Robins before him
So some random night during patrol, he’s up against several henchmen, a few of them grab him from behind, trying to hold him down. Damian is fighting against them when one of them swings a cylinder of metal that Damian thinks might’ve been meant for the plumbing and…
The henchman breaks Damian’s nose, there’s blood dripping down his chin and staining his uniform
Now… it is most certainly not the first time he’s broken something, he’s more than used to the pain, in fact, he barely feels it. However, it gives him a chance to put his little theory to the test
And so Damian allows himself to sound like the ten year old that he is and in a whiny, teary voice, goes… “Babaaaaa!” (Bonus points if it’s the first or second time he’s called Bruce baba instead of father)
What Damian didn’t take into account though, is that Batman and Robin aren’t the only ones on patrol that night. They made a big bust. The biggest part of the operation was over but they were still fighting a few stragglers. The whole fucking family is here.
And they all hear his cry.
Damian doesn’t think he’s ever seen a fight end so quickly. The henchmen only have a split-second of surprise before vanishing, being tackled or shot or having knives buried on their shoulders by his siblings.
The one that actually broke Damian’s nose is being beaten up by Nightwing, Damian doesn’t think he’s ever seen Grayson so angry.
A shadow kneels in front of him, father. Baba. He’s checking Damian and Todd is right at his side, both speaking in hushed tones, checking his injuries and wiping the tears that usually came with a broken nose.
And now… Damian is used to his father and Grayson treating him like a child, trying to be as soft as they can with him. Even Cain does it to some extent.
But… having Drake wrap an arm around him, calling him baby when knocking out one of the criminals that had hurt him ‘that’s my fucking baby brother!’ and continue to hold him later into the night on the couch, having Brown willingly give up all the snacks she keeps in her utility belt and promise to take him to Batburger the following day for milkshakes because he was ‘a champ’. And Thomas wraps his favorite blanket around Damian while they’re fixing him up.
Todd decides to stay the night at the manor. Which he never does. They all decide to spend the night at the manor when Damian still sniffles on the Batmobile and they have breakfast all of them together. Which Damian isn’t sure has ever happened before and Cain gets Alfred to make pancakes with chocolate chips instead of blueberries.
They call him baby in hushed whispers but for once, it doesn’t bother him even though it really should
But most of all, Bruce refuses to let him go for a good five minutes after he first cries for him. Smoothing down his hair and whispering that it’ll be okay and just being soft in a way Damian has never seen before.
He sleeps between his Baba and Grayson and he knows that Todd and Drake and Cain check in on them at least twice in the night for some reason.
And he realizes it’s… it’s nice. Maybe this really could be an effective battle strategy to be employed again someday.
#batman#batfam#batfamily#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#duke thomas#damian wayne#bruce wayne#batfamily headcanons#batkids#Robins
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POTES SEMI-LIVEBLOGS KOTOR!
ive been writing my thoughts in the notes app but due to popular demand (one person asked for it) i'm posting my liveblogging DO NOT SAY/TAG/COMMENT SPOILERS PLEASE i read tags
warning im a yapper, im 10 hours in and theres a lot already (separated into sessions):
SESSION 1
whos this clown i thought i would be playing as revan
ive been too spoiled by dragon age origins this character creator sucks ass
only human???? ): fr?? ill just imagine her different in my brain or some shit
my life is being mansplained to me. is this bad writing or do i have amnesiacs
hes meta now??? hes talking abt the screen controls?????
omg a jedi and an evil jediii
omg their asses suckedddd they both died immediately
i <3 bringing a sword to a gun fight
WHY R THERE SO MANY SITH WHERE IS TJE RULE OF TWO
i clicked a workbench and it said lightsaber so either i get a lightsaber or i get a jedi friend whose lightsaber i can steal if im careful
I assume u play as revan in kotor2 so im gonna buy that now so i can play it when im done playing w this clown
i got light side points im getting a good grade in game morality which is something both normal to want and possible to achieve
everyone keeps saying revan is dead but thats my friend revan from tumblr hes clearly alive. or they???
my characters ass is distractingly present onscreen
huge fan of the way everyone collapsed drunk what the FUCK was in that wine
ok these sith ppl might be the bad guys but their armour is DRIPPY AS FUCK
ideologically i dont agree w the sith but they kinda went off w the fits
googling how to become a sith without being evil cause they have Drip
SESSION 2
i paid £1.19 to see revan he better show up in this game at some point
all these sith n i still cant find one revan….. stop faking ur death rn come out n talk to me babygirl this isnt like u….
why can i be light/dark side if im not a jedi. give me a laser sword
maybe this jedi gyal will know where revan is faking his death. or give me a fuckin lightsaber PLEASEEE
was just thinking 'does this game have romance' and then carth called me beautiful. i dont think im gonna romance anyone until i get this amnesia sorted
why is carth questioning me so much abt the crash im pretty sure i have amnesia
why tf did the jedi lady have me transferred to this ship are we in lesbians with each other???
carth's not wrong it is suspicious but i lowkey have amnesia so i coulda done that i coulda not
a lot of clone wars voice actors in this. was lucasfilm so broke in the 2000s that they could only afford the same 3 VAs for every project
mission is 14??????? we need to get my girl back in school
SESH 3
tale as old as time i fucking suck at racing games
ok i didnt realise you had to mash click i won
REVAN!!! REVAN!!!!!!!!!
why am i dreaming abt revan tho. real as hell but ?????
lmao cringe revan getting blown up. i thought the jedi beat rev-meister in a fight but no. accident
"such visions are often a sign of force sensitivity" COOL YAY GIVE ME A LIGHTSABER
BASTILLE LOST HER FUCKING LIGHTSABER??
CARTH IS RIGHT THATS LIKE DAY ONE JEDI SHIT. ok i still love her even tho shes a bit of a bitch and also doesnt have a saber
if we find a lightsaber im taking it first tho
whys carth getting weird abt me being weird that he doesnt trust me. i just wanna be friends mate
SESH IV: A NEW HOPE
'i mean no disrespect, but perhaps one of the male slaves could serve you better' i went in here to start a slave revolution and instead got called a lesbo
LMAO THERES A SPICE LAB???? WALTER WHITE WHERE ARE YOU
thats insaneee they blew up BILLIONS of people to get to one jedi?????? these sith arent fucking around theyre scary
UM THIS IS CRAZY GRAPHICS THE LIGHTING IS CLEARER/DARKER WHEN I COVER THE SUN W THE SHIP EDGE?? 2003 IS THE YEAR OF THE FUTURE
someone just called me padawan i kinda assumed i was in my late 20s do i just have baby vibes
all the jedi in the movies are so chill but every kotor jedi i've met so far has been a bit of a bitch
YO THEY HAVE A YODA!!! its not THE yoda but
cool so these guys are just the regional managers at best. your asses are not the council
why can everyone smell my force juju so strong
THATS STRAIGHT UP YODA'S CLONE WARS VA
why does fake yoda not blink both eyes at the same time. im calling him master tortimer he reminds me of the animal crossing mayor
bastila there was no need for such a fancy bow
malak is like evil aang
revan is so much shorter than malak omg
are me and bastila sharing dreams. are we both obsessed w revan
poor mission ):
WHAT WAS MASTER TORTIMER ABT TO SAY????????? EVER SINCE WHEN??? DID WE KNOW EACH OTHER BEFORE MY AMNESIACS????? DID BASTILA TELL U SMTHN MORE WHEN I WASNT IN THE ROOM???
im intrigued i like this whole hidden jedi shtick its very compelling. so is whatever theyre hiding from me
kinda surprising no jedi found me before tho given my force juju is so strong
IM A LEGIT JEDI NOW??? SICK!!!
does revan rlly not have pronouns i thought that was a tumblr thing but they straight up are a nonbinary icon ive never heard a single pronoun used. revan's pronouns are revan/revan's
damn revan seems so cool in these stories (charismatic war hero that convinced their troops to join them as conqueror?? julius caesar) and yet all we've seen them do onscreen is get blown up and die by accident
A YEAR AGO? the way they were talking i assumed revan died like. a week before the game started
master uh i forgot his name he has martin scorcese vibes said revan was a paragon of the jedi so what im getting is that all jedi gifted kids turn evil
even if i didnt know revan as a tumblr darling id KNOW revan has to be alive somewhere they way everyone talks abt them is too cool for a character who exploded and died. i think. i hope. I PAID £1.19 TO MEET REVAN
'only you and bastila can stop malak' seriously????? just us two?? ive been a jedi for like, 6 minutes and you guys keep calling bastila young???? do you guys not wanna help??
omg im getting carth to traumadump! <3
HE WAS ON REVAN'S ARMY>??
i totally knew the jedi code and did not have to google it whatsoever
they rlly said fuck going to illum heres a crystal from the bin
he told me id be a great sentinel and i was like i know but i want blue cause i dont wanna be matchies with bastila
OGH!!! I HAVE A LIGHTSABER!!!! THIS IS GAME OF THE YEAR!!!!
omg i made my lightsaber perfectlyyy which is rare <3 getting a good grade in jedi
maybe i was a travelling lightsaber salesman before my amnesia
seriously though WHO was i everyone's kinda stopped acting like i have amnesia since the first mission BUT IVE PLAYED DRAGON AGE THAT GIVES YOU OPPORTUNITIES TO RP UR PAST. THIS DOESNT. EITHER THIS GAME IS BAD (but i love it so its not) OR I HAVE RETROGRADE AMNESIA
also everyone keeps being like "Oh ur force juju is so strong" AND NOBODY FOUND ME TIL NOW??? suspicious. did getting a really bad concussion activate the force in me
im too confused and amnesiac'd to think abt anything except the fact i have a glowing stick now
FSESH FIVE:
big fan of using aliens to avoid having to get VAs to read every line
oh so carth's boyfriend saul betrayed him and became leader of the sith fleet so he has trust issues
well he needs to calm down. i can't betray him cause i dont know what the fuck is happening
yooo i love the design differences on the mandalorians
oh my god this lady wanted to fuck her droid cause it was her husband's. and then it killed itself. wtf. game of the year tho
wtf they jebaited this juhani person into going dark side but then i talked her out of it. that seems a bit mean of them
i hope she can join my party she looks too unique to be a random npc
ive been thinking and I might be going crazy but there was a loading screen tip ages ago that said jedis could wipe ppl's mind and all i thought at the time was 'fuck the shitshow acolyte didnt make that up'. but what if one of them wiped MY memory and i used to be a jedi or smthn ????????
cause they keep being like ur weirdly good at this??? did bastila steal my memories??????????
I KNOW I HAVE AMNESIA!! EVEN IF EVERYONE DOESN'T BRING IT UP BC THEYRE PROBABLY TRYING TO SAVE MY FEELINGS
if i dont have amnesia and im just deeping the fact the opening had my life being mansplained then im gonna look real stupid
anyway time 2 go to the fuckshit ruins cave where r-dog and malak went to
"it must be referring to revan. the dark lord and malak--" revan's pronouns are revan/thedarklord
bastila said theres no mention of the Builders in the archives. does she just know every text off by heart
THIS DROID IS 20K YEARS OLD ???
omg i can equip 2 lightsabers at once. game of the year
OK I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT THE AMNESIA BASTILA IS ASKING ME QUESTIONS ABOUT MY BACKGROUND THAT I CAN ANSWER. I REPEAT I DO NOT HAVE AMNESIA
ok i didnt get choices and i didnt really uh… say anything that i didnt already get told im still not ruling out amnesia
also booo i didnt get to find out how old i was
master tortimer rlly looks like the ultimate ketamine yoda
LMAO THERE WAS A DIALOGUE OPTION 2 CALL JUHANI A CATGIRL
omg kashyyk from jedi fallen order!!!
I CAN UPGRADE MY LIGHTSABER THIS IS JUST LIKE JFO
omg this ship is fun i wish everyone had personalised bunk spaces like hfw… a game which came out 19 years after this i should probably just take what we have
im gonna start w manaan cause im p sure thats what B-dog said n its the same language the droid was speakin
omg hyperspace from star wars
THE GUY THE BUILDING FELL ON???
am i having dreams abt revan bc bastila killed revan and im connected to her this is so roundabout
maybe i'd sleep better if my ponytail wasnt clipping into the pillow
[kiwi accent] six
carth needs a xanax every time i think we're friends he stops trusting me
also lmao he actually pointed out how wild it was that a day one padawan is being sent on this uber important mission and HES RIGHT IT IS WEIRD!! i thought it was main character logic but he's calling it out
i really really like the sense of unease that's setting in like at first i thought it was just cause im not used to 2003 games but no this is on purpose bc carth my friend carth keeps calling it out
THERE IS A CHILD ON MY SHIP ??????????????????
lmao the representative for menaan is roland wann. its like poetry it rhymes
there are no cameras in the sith hangar <3 rookie error i can commit crimes now
bastila's favourite hobby is getting shot and walking into my grenades
this isnt a combat system this is a missing system
I GOT ARRESTED???? IM JUST A GIRL
nvm i had a datapad that said the sith were evil so theyve let me go free and we're besties
why do i feel like ive just walked into an underwater horror mission
this suit waddles at the speed of a penguin on fentanyl
i tamed the beastie this is like how to train your dragon
MALAK FIRED ON REVAN?????? WERENT THEY BEST FRIENDS???????
but maybe revan escaped when bastila wasnt looking THEYRE FINE THEYRE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE. I BELIEVE
so hopefully when we run into revan they'll be like agh i changed my ways cause of the being shot thing and they'll be my bestie
great news i successfully communicated w the ship child and gave her back to dantooine. my girl has shockingly good linguisitics skills
bastila is so dour "oh watch out for the dark side" GIRL I AM. I NEED TO GET THE BEST GRADE IN GAME MORALITY
ok OFF TO KASHYYK i hope cal kestis is there… thru the force i guess… bc he wont be born for another 4000 years but its whatever
omg you'll never guess what. another vision. wow its one of the thangs. cool this is a tomorrow me problem
#how long to beat says it's abt 29 hours so this is roughly a third (??) of the game???#talk is cheap#kotor#swkotor#knights of the old republic
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Morty is so dumb that...
1. He regularly disarms Rick's neutrino bombs. The first time he did it it was completely on the fly, no prior experience. Yet, he did it.

2. He has a knack for learning alien languages... as for the tree people in the battery dimension, it was obviously done without any sort of translator or support. (And he took over as their leader)
3. He's quick on his feet and can think his way out in a stressful situation, figuring out things that Rick can't and coming up with innovative solutions.



4. He figured out how to use a portal gun.

5. He can figure out how machines he's never seen nor used before work, and employ them successfully.

6. Beat Rick (smartest man in the universe?) in a board game.

7. Can manipulate said "smartest man in the universe", if he so chooses.
8. Became a successful stock broker. Out of the blue. Just did it.

9. Run. Whole. Freaking. Civilizations (and also toppled them as Marta)
10. Pitches good ideas that Rick typically ignores

11. When suddenly becomes motivated to try, he is good at math

12. His ideas were good enough that he would have gotten a deal for a movie production...!

13. His default intelligence is maxed out.

...At this point, it's only a matter of time before he starts making his own inventions, Eyepatch-Morty-style.
GUYS.
The only reason we've been thinking that Morty is stupid is that Rick has been calling him stupid repeatedly.
Sure, Morty does plenty of dumb stuff, but so does Rick. Rick has the emotional intelligence of a four year old and throws tantrums of cosmic proportions whenever slighted (vat of acid? submit to the selfie?), while often going ahead with complicated, innovative ideas... that in reality solve nothing and are a waste of time (Pickle Rick?? Leg Rick?? Cloning his own daughter? The dumb time-loop in his own dimension? Replacing himself with a robot? Creating a robot ghost to scary Mr Poopybutthole instead of just telling him to leave??) Not to mention his many incredibly lame jokes.
Everyone does dumb stuff occasionally!!! No one is an impeccable genius of non-stop moments of brightness!! (even Eyepatch Morty, the most cautious character, the character who has made basically NO MISTAKES up to now, sounds dumb a couple of times: "I'm gonna do the thing I wanna do, with the curve thing" and "My biggest fear is other people being afraid. Of fear. Itself." lol).
If Rick hadn't been calling Morty a freaking idiot with every breath available, we wouldn't be thinking "oh look haha the moron became a stock broker, what a joke, must be some sort of fluke"; we would be thinking "what an incredibly gifted kid".
We would attribute Morty's many mistakes to lack of experience, to lack of wisdom, to youth, to enthusiasm, to idealism, to teenager hormones, to acting hastily.
We would wish to see him eventually mature, apply his time and effort to worthwhile endeavors instead (mainly) of inane teenage stuff. We would wish to see him do well in school, we would wish to see him reach his full potential and succeed in great things.
Only Rick keeps pounding our heads with how stupid Morty is, and all of Morty's successes are never mentioned again, but getting lost to oblivion in comparison to Rick's (who has 60+ years more experience) genius.
WE VIEWERS ARE BEING UNWITTINGLY MANIPULATED THE EXACT SAME WAY MORTY IS.
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Run, baby, run
Summary: Natasha is very competitive, and that includes your daughter.
Natasha Romanoff x F!R
Based on some real life events lol
Natasha was a lot of different things for many people. Depending on who you ask -friends, foes, family- she could be stubborn, deadly, relentless. To you she was kind, loving and supportive, in a way that no one else knew.
You would all agree on one thing, though.
Natasha was too competitive.
Being married for three years, you’d grown used to it. As a matter of fact, it could be entertaining especially if she was playing pool or darts against the boys.
But this morning, when she shows you the flyer, you actually have to look twice, sure that Natasha lost her mind.
“Baby crawl race?”
“Yeah, only for babies under one year. You know, they set a track and time them…”
“I mean, I figured. I just… why would we want Anya to do that?”
Your daughter perks up when she hears her name being called and you both smile.
Anya is ten months old, but she’s way advanced for her age. It must be Natasha’s genes, because you’re sure that before she turns one, she will be walking or even running after her other mother.
“It sounds fun”
“And winning has nothing to do with it?” you press, reading about the prizes. “Everything listed here are things we already have. A stroller, a crib… ooh, a formula machine, fancy”
“We can still register if we leave now” Natasha picks up Anya from her playpen, and the sight of their matching red hair melts your heart as usual.
“Fine. We better get going”
—
To your surprise, there are over a dozen babies registered to compete. Natasha takes care of everything as you walk around the store where they’re hosting the event.
She comes back with a smile and a little paper with the number 17 on it.
“Your lucky number” she smiles at you, taking Anya in her arms.
You both watch as other kinds play and stumble around the mat. Most of them seem younger than your daughter, and only a few look close to being one year.
“That one’s gonna be easy to beat” Natasha muses, looking at a small kid that can barely sit.
“Natalia” you slap her arm. “He’s a baby”
“No. They are all competition. And we have no mercy, right, detka?” Natasha insists, bouncing your daughter in her arms.
“Alright, I’m changing her diaper before everything gets crazier” you decide, noticing how there’s a crowd forming around the place where the kids will crawl.
You make small talk with some of the clerks, who seem excited at the prospect of a silly race that will entertain them in the middle of their shift.
By the time you return, Natasha’s quiet, looking at the parents and their children.
“Everything ok?”
“Perfect” she nods, taking Anya in her arms. “Now, kiddo, listen to me, we are Romanoffs. We are fighters and more importantly, winners. So go and make us proud”
Anya responds by giggling and pulling a strand of her mother’s hair. Natasha smiles, saying something in Russian and kissing Anya’s cheek.
The mat is split in half so only two kids can compete at the same time, a screen with a timer behind them.
As expected, some of the kids get distracted by their race mate or crawl around instead of going in a straight line.
“What did I tell you? We’re gonna crush the opponents” Natasha whispers and you slap her arm.
She’s taking this way too seriously.
As you stand next to some parents, Natasha sniffs around, speaking into Anya’s back.
“Baby, did you go potty?”
“I don’t think so” you know Anya frowns and makes a little grunt when she does number two and she’s been pretty quiet this whole time.
“Oh, never mind” she turns to the parents standing next to you. “Not ours, detka”
The parents hurry to the bathroom. There’s a nagging feeling at the back of your mind when you notice how quiet Natasha is. It increases when the parents miss the race because they were stuck chaning a diaper.
Your wife tries to hide her smile, but there’s no way she planned this. Just a coincidence.
Right?
“Babies 10 and 11” the organizer calls. You noticed the girl is older than the other kids, standing out because she can close the distance faster.
“Best time has been 55 seconds. This should be interesting” Natasha comments.
Sure enough, the kid is about to finish when a bright blue ball crosses her path, getting her distracted and making her return to the start line.
The parents try to guide her back but it doesn’t work at all.
“Oh, well”
“Try not to look so happy about it” you whisper, but Natasha just chuckles and places a kiss in your temple.
After a few more minutes, it’s Anya’s turn. You carry her to the start line and Natasha kneels at the end of the mat, keeping her eyes focused on your daughter.
“Three, two, one. Go!”
All Natasha has to do is place her open palm on the mat. Anya’s seen her do it so many times and knows it means one thing: as soon as she touches her mama’s hand, she’ll throw her in the air the way she loves to.
It takes Anya 15 seconds to get to Natasha. Your wife rewards her with her favorite thing, and if it were anyone less graceful and quick, you’d be unnerved by the sight of your daughter kicking her feet while being lifted off the ground.
“Nicely done, pumpkin” you join them, smiling as Anya jumps to your arms.
“A worthy adversary, at last” a man comments as he takes his son to the race. “Let’s see if we can do it better than you”
“Doubt it” Natasha glares but you elbow her, smiling at the man.
“She meant to say, good luck. You’ll do great, sweetheart” you smile at his son, who waves back at you with wide eyes. He’s incredibly cute.
“Fraternizing with the enemy” Natasha tsks.
“He’s a baby, Nat”
“I didn’t like the way the father was looking at you either” Natasha grumbles, leaning forward to kiss you.
Definitely not complaining about her competitive streak now.
As your declared enemy gets ready to race, the father frantically looks around for something lost on their backpack.
“Did you bring it?” his wife insists.
“Yes! The purple elephant! We were playing with it a second ago!”
Apparently, that was their only resource, because the timer starts and their kid is focusing on everything but them.
They manage to finish after two minutes.
“Better luck next time” Natasha comments as they leave, her hand going around your waist.
She’s being so ridiculous but somehow you love it.
The winners are announced, and you cheer when the first place goes to none other than Anya Romanoff.
“Yes, baby. We are the champions” Natasha sings, bouncing her around. Anya has no idea what’s happening, but she’s enjoying the moment.
“Very nice” you comment when the organizers hand you the prize. “Good work, Anya. Keep it up and maybe we won’t have to pay for college”
“Of course she’ll get a scholarship. Or become a professional athlete. Or become president” Natasha says, walking back to the car.
“Oh, those are a lot of things. Maybe she’ll want to focus on just one”
“Nah, she’s got it. She’ll do it all” Natasha kisses Anya’s head and you can’t help but melt.
“Best thing you ever won?” you ask Natasha as you drive back home.
“No, that would be you” she says. “Of course, I mean the bet I made with Tony that I’d get you to date me over him”
“Ugh, you’re so ridiculous” you roll your eyes.
—
The excitement of the race exhausts your daughter, and she’s fast asleep by the time you get home.
You know this won’t last long, so you prepare her clothes to run a bath once she’s up.
As you’re going through her bag, you pull out a toy that’s definitely not Anya’s.
A purple elephant.
“Natalia Alianovna Romanova!” you shout, looking for her.
“Oh-oh” Natasha mutters and clears her throat. “Yes, dear?”
“You took that baby’s toy!”
“I did not! Ok, I did. But look, I timed him when they were practising and Anya’s time was still better. I just really didn’t like the way he was staring at your boobs”
“Mhm, right. Winning was just a plus”
“See? You get me”
“That ball that distracted the other kid was not a mistake either, huh?”
“I don’t know what you mean, darling”
“And the parents that missed the race for changing the diaper?”
“Now, that was just a happy coincidence. The rest, yeah. Totally me”
“Evil! Stealing a toy from a toddler” you wave the purple elephant in her face. Natasha takes it and throws it over her shoulder, wrapping your legs around her waist in a swift motion. “What are you doing?”
“I got you that fancy formula machine, didn’t I? Where’s my prize?”
You laugh against her lips, but it soon turns into a moan, as you feel Natasha’s hands slide down your back to cup your ass.
“Anya's gonna wake up in thirty minutes or less. Can you handle that?”
“I do enjoy a good challenge” Natasha says against your lips, showing you how much she loves to win.
And honestly? After a mind blowing orgasm, you love it too.
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Self Control: Part Fifteen - Wedding (Epilogue)
Jessie Fleming x Reader
Summary: Raising a kid certainly derailed your and Jessie's wedding timeline, but after many months, the big day is finally here.
Warnings: G!P content. Oral (J receiving). Fingering. G!P penetrative sex. Possessive language. Preg/breeding kinks. Language.
A/N: Well, everyone, the closing chapter is finally here. To everyone still with me on this journey or those who are new - thank you! I hope you enjoy. Full series is here.
"How are you holding up? I hope you're having a fun night."
Jessie read your message and quietly removed herself from a group conversation to take up a seat on a nearby couch.
"Honestly? A bit overwhelmed lol. Missing you and Riley."
"Yeah, who decided to follow through with these weird traditions of us not spending the night together lol."
"Seriously haha. We can blame my friends for that. But hey - at least we spent the day together, we just aren't allowed to spend the night lol."
"Well...Riley's probably fast asleep with your parents. But, if you want a break from the unrelenting celebrations, there's nothing stopping us from running into each other on a midnight walk."
"I love that idea. Let's do it. Meet over by the dining cabin on the far end of the complex? There shouldn't be anyone over there at this hour. I need probably 10 min."
"Done. See you soon, love."
Jessie realized she was smiling as she put away her phone. She cleared her throat and ran her palms against her thighs as she began to formulate her exit.
Her neutral expression was short lived as her eyes fell upon the three newly inked lines across the wrist of her right hand, more or less a mirror of the ones she'd gotten years prior on her other wrist. These lines though - one for each member of her new family; you, herself and Riley.
"Smiling to yourself the night before your wedding - that's gotta beat sweating bullets and having an existential crisis."
Jessie arched an eyebrow at Janine as she stood.
"Yeah, none of that here," she chuckled as she started to make her way towards the cabin door. "My parents texted. I forgot a bag of Riley's stuff in the car. I'm just gonna go grab that and drop it off at their cabin."
"Oh, I can do that. Stay - this is your night. You can't leave - you're the star of the show."
"Now that has me sweating bullets," Jessie replied dryly with a teasing eyeroll as she grabbed her keys and continued walking. "I'll be back in a bit."
She ignored Janine's persisting rebuttals with a charming smile and a wave as she stepped outside and closed the door behind her. She took a deep breath, enjoying the fresh mountain air as she looked up at a dark sky lit up by twinkling stars and a crescent moon.
She shoved her hands in her pockets and began the trek over to the other side of the complex you and her had rented out for your wedding.
Though both of you would've loved to have little to no fanfare or audience, it really just wasn't feasible no matter how much you tried to trim the invite list. Jessie would've loved simply eloping - going away for a weekend alone and coming back married, but that would've gotten her killed by a multitude of friends and family.
As a compromise though, you wanted to have the wedding be as 'you' as possible, meaning you both found this nice, rustic mountain resort with cabins, hiking trails, a beautiful creek and more as opposed to having it at some fancy venue in the city.
The wedding took a while to get off the ground. What with a baby in the picture and a new club season and international window to work around, all of the effort required to pull a wedding together just fell by the wayside. By the time this day came around, your baby went from a newborn to an 18-month old toddler in the blink of an eye.
The cabin Jessie went to meet you at was dark when she arrived, as expected. It was locked at this hour, but this cabin was far enough away from where all the guests and staff stayed that she wasn't entirely worried about privacy. She went around to the back and leaned against the wall as she waited for you.
She patiently looked up at the constellations until she heard faint footsteps in the distance. A smile crept across her face and evolved into a full blown grin as you rounded the corner, tentatively peeking around.
You put on a mock expression of surprise, a hand to your chest as you approached.
"Oh my gosh. What in the world? I can't believe that you're out here too."
Jessie laughed and mimicked your expression. "No way! So crazy." She shrugged her shoulders. "Oh well, what can you do?" She pulled you into her arms and gave you a kiss. She smiled further as your arms came up around the back of her neck and you leaned fully in.
You rest your forehead against hers and exhaled quietly as the kiss ended. "This is so silly, but I feel like I haven't kissed you at all today. I know we did during all those games and such, but, you know what I mean."
"A real kiss," Jessie answered, knowing exactly what you meant. Doing all of these couples games and people hooting and hollering for you and her to kiss was a bit of a nightmare to begin with, but it also certainly wasn't an intimate, real kiss.
"See? You get me," you said as you gave an exaggerated, contented sigh. "I guess that's why I'm marrying you."
She chuckled and captured your lips in another kiss.
"Yeah, you're pretty much stuck with me," she said. "Pretty hard for you to back out now."
You shot her a withering look and rolled your eyes to which Jessie just grinned.
"Yeah, I'm really dying to get out of this relationship. It's the worst," you deadpanned.
"I knew it," Jessie played along and you rolled your eyes once more, this time pulling back and placing your hands on your hips.
"Well, I mean, I hardly know you," you said slowly, eyeing her up and down before reaching out and letting a finger trail down her chest. "I thought you were such a good girl, but here you are sneaking out at night and breaking the rules." Your eyes met hers and she smirked at the glint she saw in them.
"I can be bad for you," Jessie said rather smugly as she wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you close again.
"Well," you smirked as you drew teasing circles along her shoulder, "let's keep that between you and me. I'd hate for you to have an early midlife crisis and go through a belated Bad Girl phase. Fucking around and all."
She gave you a look. "You really don't get how much I adore you? Us having a baby together and getting married really hasn't convinced you yet?"
You toyed with her shirt idly, the look in your eyes shifting slightly. "People get married and have kids all the time. It's not a guarantee of anything. Feelings change. Wants change."
Jessie let out a slight laugh, but narrowed her eyes nonetheless. "Well are your feelings or wants going to change?"
"No," you replied simply and easily, holding her gaze.
"Then why would mine?" She challenged lightly, causing your eyes to drift downward towards the ground. Jessie thumbed your cheek gently and pushed your hair behind your ear. "You really don't get it. There's absolutely no one else for me. It's you. Every moment. Every day. There's no competition. I love you so incredibly much. And just when I think I can't love you more, you do or say something that makes me fall even more for you."
Even in the dim light of the moon, Jessie could see the faintest signs of blush on your cheeks.
"Whoa," you joked shyly, eyes still on the ground before lifting them to meet hers. "Save something for the vows."
"I need you to know how much I love you," Jessie said earnestly. She watched you intently and you eventually sighed.
"I know...I just love you so much. I think the world of you and I don't ever want to lose you. I honestly don't know what I'd do."
"You're not going to lose me," she assured you. "It's been years and my friends still make fun of me for how obsessed I am with you. Never mind how whipped," she finished with a smirk, but held your gaze unwaveringly. "You're the one. You're my everything. You're my best friend. The love of my life. The mother of my child. And tomorrow?" She spoke intently, eyes looking down at your lips as she caressed your cheek once more. "You'll be my wife."
The kiss started off slow - just two people in love. Jessie wanted to somehow express how deeply she felt for you and reassure you that she'd always be here.
It wasn't long until the kiss began to grow hungrier, Jessie finding herself slowly being pushed back against the wall of the cabin, both your hands and hers beginning to wander. The sounds of your heavy kisses filling the night air.
"God, I wish we were staying together tonight," Jessie mumbled into the kiss as she felt her pants beginning to grow taut against her. She moaned deep in her throat as your hand came to cup her growing length.
"Maybe we should just go to the honeymoon cabin," you suggested as you two continued to kiss. You dipped your head and began to kiss down her neck. She groaned once more and her eyes fell shut as she attempted to think.
"W-we don't have the keys," she eventually managed. You made a noise of complaint, but continued to caress her restrained cock.
"Well...," you said slowly as you began to undo Jessie's pants. "It's just us out here."
"Babe," Jessie said, half in warning, half in astonishment as you began to kiss your way down her shirt and soon dropped to your knees in the dirt and fully undid her pants.
"What?" You asked teasingly as you looked up at her. "You don't like me on my knees for you?"
A low rumble emanated from her chest as she let her head fall back against the wooden slats of the cabin wall, a blissful grin on her lips as her hand began to run through your hair.
"Jesus Christ," Jessie mumbled, though certainly not in complaint. She looked down at you again with a crooked smile. "You're talking about me being a bad girl - it's your fault. You're the bad influence." She recalled the events of the past couple of years. "Getting me hard in the back of my friend's car and feeling me up, being so fucking sexy that I just have to jack myself off while on the phone with you and getting freakin' caught. Fucking in my parents' basement and in my childhood bedroom while my mom is on the other side of the door. Got me storing a collection of dirty photos of you in the back of the nightstand. Never mind what's in my phone. And now you're about to give me head while we're outside where anyone could see."
Jessie groaned again as you reached into her boxers and released her stiff cock, your fingers trailing teasingly along its length.
"Well. When you put it that way...," you said with a smirk. "But looking at how hard you are right now and the way your cock is already leaking cum for me, I'd say you like it."
She gripped your hair tightly before releasing it and running her fingers through your locks once more. She closed her eyes and nodded her affirmation. "Yeah. You can confidently say I like it."
"Well good," you accepted with a light chuckle as you rubbed her precum across the tip of her cock and teased her a bit more. She moaned low in her chest again and subtly began to thrust into your hand. You smiled. "Hey Jess?"
"Mm?" She asked, forcing herself to open her eyes once more and look down at you. God, you really did look incredible kneeling in front of her with her stiff cock in your hand. You gave her a teasing smile.
"I love you," you said as you took her into your mouth.
"Oh fuck," Jessie said in a low voice as your warm mouth wrapped around her and your tongue teased her tip. You moaned around her cock and she clutched your hair tightly in her hand once more. "Jesus."
She let her head fall back against the cabin and she leaned back, grateful for the structure behind her because of how weak in the knees she felt already. Her breathing deepened as you took her deeper and continued to pump her up and down with your fist.
Her jaw was slack as she finally opened her eyes. What a moment - your head slowly bobbing up and down on her length, looking absolutely gorgeous on this starry night, out in the wilderness on the eve of your wedding. In all of her wildest dreams, she could've never thought this up.
It didn't take long for Jessie to feel that tightening sensation between her legs and it took so much control for her to keep her thrusts gentle, her tip nudging the back of your throat and not pushing deeper.
"I'm gonna cum," she warned you. You moaned, nearly setting her off with the vibration of it, and began to take her deeper into your throat.
Jessie held back a loud moan, a muffled grunt escaping her throat instead as she released herself down your throat, her palm flat against the back of your head as she bit her lips and emptied herself.
You eventually pulled back with a slight cough, your eyes starting to water as you swallowed her load.
"Shit, I'm sorry," she breathed as she looked down at you and leaned down to help you to your feet.
"Don't be sorry," you said with a choked laugh. "It's hot."
She tucked herself back into her boxers and did up her pants. You leaned against her, her arms wrapping around you in an embrace as you both settled. She played with your hair and kissed the side of your face as she came down from her climax.
She felt you sigh in her arms. "I wish we could just go to bed together tonight," you repeated her earlier wish.
"I know," she sighed against you as she ran her fingers up and down the back of your neck. You shivered against her.
"Cool it," you said as you shrugged her hand away. "I'm already worked up."
"Yeah?" Jessie asked, peeking one eye open and looking over at you, a devilish smile beginning to form. Her hand drifted down your body until she reached the top of your pants. You didn't protest as she began to unbutton them, instead only moaning and gently rolling your hips against her.
Any drowsiness she felt in the haze of her orgasm quickly dissipated and she flipped you both so you had your back against the wall of the cabin. She dipped her head down and began gently sucking on the sensitive skin of your neck. You gasped softly, fingers digging into her crown as she did so and it drove her crazy.
Despite her recent climax, she felt herself growing hard once again as you quietly mewled in her ear and rolled your hips against hers. She felt a rush of arousal come over her, her body tensing up as she resisted the urge to truly pin you against the wall and have her way with you. She subconsciously sucked harder on your neck.
"Jess!" You hissed, bringing her back to the moment. She blinked, pulling away in confusion as you slapped a hand to your neck and stared wide-eyed at her. "The night before our wedding?! Really?"
Jessie stared at you a moment longer until you lifted your hand away, revealing the initial signs of a hickey. She cowered slightly, heat rushing to her face but she couldn't stifle the laugh that escaped either. She stared at it and eventually gave a half-hearted shrug.
"You're going to be wearing makeup," she offered before laughing once more. Her smile turned into a grin. "Besides, everyone already knows you're mine anyway."
Your eyes flashed and you leaned forward, latching onto her neck and sucking hard. You pulled back a moment later with a very satisfied look on your face as Jessie was now the one to cover her neck with a palm.
"What the fuck!" She hissed in return. "I'm not wearing makeup tomorrow. How am I supposed to cover it up?" She gave a disgruntled noise of complaint and you simply shrugged haughtily.
"They can photoshop it out. And now everyone will know you're mine as well."
"Oh my God," Jessie said, her mild irritation waning and quickly shifting to affection. She grabbed your hands and pinned them above your head. Her cock pulsed at the wicked grin you gave her as you held her gaze. "I gave you my baby. I gave you my ring. And now my name, too. I don't think anyone would've doubted I'm yours."
You looked upward in mock contemplation before smirking at her. "You can't blame me for wanting to stake my claim on you," you said as you rolled your hips against her once more causing her eyes to drift shut as an all too fleeting wave of pleasure rushed through her.
Despite Jessie pinning your hands above you and seemingly being in control, it fooled neither of you - you were very much in control. No surprise. And she didn't mind at all.
She released one of your hands and reached down to cup your heat through your underwear. She let out a low moan of approval at the dampness and radiating heat she was met with there. She pushed your panties aside and ran two fingers through your slick folds. A grin crossed her face as your knees buckled and you melted into her embrace, clutching her closely and gasping in her ear.
"God, you are so wet for me, baby," she said as she relished the feeling of your wet folds, clit and sopping entrance. Her cock strained painfully against her boxers and pants as she slipped two digits inside of your entrance. You gasped further and let yourself fall into her waiting hand.
"Fuck," you whispered as you gripped her curled fingers. She withdrew them slightly and pushed inside once more, the sounds of fingers moving through your arousal filled the otherwise quiet night air and Jessie's jaw dropped in amazement.
"Holy fuck. You are soaking and you sound so fucking good. Oh my God." She ground out the last part and couldn't help but grind herself against your thigh.
"Jesus Christ, Jess," you panted already as you rocked into her hand. "I want you to fuck me."
"Babe," she said as she buried her face into your neck, rolling her head against you in want as she felt your core accommodating the girth of her fingers. She could feel the ridges and curves of your walls as they fluttered and flexed around her and her cock twitched as she continued to slowly grind herself against you for some semblance of relief.
"God, Jess. I know you want me too," you said as you shook off her hand and reached down to cup her once more, massaging her firmly through the taut fabric.
"I didn't bring a condom with me," she said as she slowly thrust against your palm. "They're back at my cabin."
You exhaled heavily though you didn't stop the gyration of your hips or the movement of your hand. You ran your other hand through her hair.
"Sorry I didn't think to bring one - I didn't exactly anticipate this," she said.
"Well, stop being so sweet and romantic - meeting up in the middle of the night out in the moonlight and telling me how much you love me. If you stop doing that and stop being so attractive then maybe I'll stop spreading my legs for you."
Jessie let out another low moan and her grip tightened on you. Soft noises of want and need came from you both for several moments until you finally spoke.
"Riley's 18 months old now," you started. "The doctor said we're in the clear to start trying again if we wanted to."
A low growl rumbled up Jessie's through as she pushed her fingers deeper inside of you and ground her hips against you harder. You let out a breathy chuckle.
"I know you've been dying to fuck me without a condom again," you teased.
"Oh my God," Jessie muttered as she began to hump you a touch faster. "Don't tempt me. I'm not fucking kidding."
"Who says I'm kidding?" You said breathlessly as you dug your fingers into her crown once more.
"I'm serious," she said through nearly grit teeth as her free hand dug into the small of your back and pulled you tightly against her. "If you tell me we're trying again, you're leaving here with baby #2 inside of you." She forced herself to take a deep breath. "If you aren't ready, it's fine. I can sneak back to the cabin and get a condom."
"And what if I don't want you to?"
Jessie moaned, legitimately worried she was going to bust in her pants. "Then I'm fucking a baby into you tonight."
You didn't say anything. Instead, you shifted, Jessie pulling back to look at you only to see you shimmying your pants and underwear down your legs. You nodded to her and she immediately began undoing her pants once more.
Your pants and underwear fell into a heap on the ground, Jessie's barely dropping down around her ankles before you wrapped your leg around her waist and grabbed her bare cock, positioning it at your entrance.
Jessie didn't hesitate in sinking inside of you, sliding in to the hilt right off the bat. A wanton moan escaped you, probably louder than either of you intended or wanted, but you were both so far gone that it went unnoticed and Jessie began thrusting in and out of you with a level of urgency and desperation that might've embarrassed her in the past, but the way you gasped and clawed at her it only egged her on.
"I love you so much," she panted into your ear as her wet strokes filled her ears.
"I love you too," you whimpered in return as you bounced on her cock, your shirt the only thing keeping your back from getting scratched up from the cabin walls.
"Jesus Christ, I'm going to cum already," Jessie said a short while later. She panted, forcing herself to refocus for a moment to look you in the eyes. "Are you sure?"
"Cum inside me. I want you," you told her.
She needed no further encouragement and a few strokes later was pushing inside of you as deep as she could, spilling herself with a shuddering breath. She whimpered as strings of cum continued to shoot out of her and into you, coating your insides with her potent seed.
"Fuck," she breathed as she slowly drew her hips back. She looked down, seeing a mixture of your cum and hers along her cock before she pushed back inside of you, loving the way you moaned at the motion.
You stayed in one another's embrace for as long as you could before you both agreed that you should head back to your respective cabins. You reluctantly put on your clothes and walked back towards the guest cabins hand in hand.
You reached yours first and Jessie walked you up the steps to the door, no longer caring if someone saw you two together.
"Aww, it's like a first date," you said facetiously with a chuckle as you wrapped your arms around her and she kissed you. She leaned into your ear and whispered.
"Yeah, except this time my cum's deep inside of you and with any luck you'll be carrying my baby soon."
You blushed and swatted at her.
"Stop," you hushed her as she grinned at you. You relented with a brief shake of your head. "True though." Jessie continued to grin devilishly at you and you gave her another playful shove. "K. Get to bed, you heathen. You have a very important event tomorrow and you better not be late."
She kissed you again. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."
---------------
Despite Jessie's exceptional dislike for attention, she felt calm and elated as she stood with you at the alter in front of all your friends and family and said your vows to one another.
The ceremony was lovely. The tears started early. First being when her mom came out with Riley; Riley in her dress and Jessie's mom's at the ready as Riley waddled down the aisle as she haphazardly threw handfuls of petals on the ground, straight up into the air - sometimes at the guests - dropping the basket entirely as she spotted Jessie and ran towards her, clutching her leg tightly.
"Up! Up!" Riley asked and Jessie glanced to her mom. She was supposed to sit with her mom and dad during the ceremony. She looked down at her little girl - with her curly, dark hair, brown eyes and bright red cheeks - she really was Jessie's kid. She bent down and picked her up, holding her against her hip.
"You look so pretty, my girl," Jessie whispered to her as she kissed her forehead. She pointed towards the crowd. "Let's wait for momma, okay? She'll be here soon."
She couldn't keep her eyes off of you. She started crying the second she saw you in your dress. It must've surprised Riley, because the little one just clung to her harder and buried her head in her neck.
"My two favourite people," you cooed as you came up, kissing Riley on the cheek and cupping Jessie's face to give her a quick peck. You made a face immediately after. "Oops, am I not supposed to kiss you yet?"
"Who cares," Jessie laughed as she handed Riley over to you, the toddler reaching for you as you stood across from them.
"Hi sweetie," you said as you took her. "Did you know mommy would've never asked me to marry her if not for you?"
"What!" Jessie protested in as hushed a tone as she could muster. She could feel her cheeks heating up already. "Of course I would've!"
"I'm just kidding," you told her. You laughed at how flustered Jessie was and gave her a wink. "We're off to a good start."
You handed Riley to her grandparents and the ceremony continued, culminating with you slipping new bands on each other's fingers and sharing a kiss that had everyone cheering and clapping.
Considering how some wedding receptions were, yours and Jessie's was pretty tame - at least for you two.
Even though it was probably overkill, you'd switched to non-alcoholic, coming up with creative excuses as to why and Jessie was simply never much for drinking in the first place. Though, her friends did manage to get her to do a couple of shots that left her cringing and coughing as you watched on and laughed.
Jessie was chatting with some of the guests when she heard her daughter's laugh followed by thundering, but clumsy, footsteps as she ran through the crowd, people nearly tripping over themselves to avoid bumping into her. She'd discovered a few weeks ago that she could run - or something akin to it - and she'd been nonstop ever since.
Jessie laughed as suddenly you emerged from a group and picked Riley up mid-run. She pouted and flailed momentarily, but whatever you said to her caused her to relax in your arms. Jessie excused herself from conversation and smiled as she approached you two.
"Look who's here," you said as you looked down to Riley and pointed to Jessie.
"Mommy!" Riley exclaimed, beaming upon seeing Jessie.
"She's having a field day out here," you said slyly to Jessie with a teasing look. "Running any chance she can get. Cheeks extra rosy from running around. And look at that smile," you said as you gently poked your daughter's cheek, eliciting a giggle from her. You looked at Jessie pointedly. "She's certainly your daughter."
Jessie took a moment to kiss Riley before leaning in to whisper in your ear.
"She better be mine," she teased. You pulled back with a smirk before leaning in to whisper back.
"What? You wouldn't want me carrying and having someone else's baby?"
Before Jessie could respond, you were walking away, eyes glimmering playfully. She called after you.
"No. I'd despise that!"
You turned and shrugged, earning a dangerous look from her. You grinned and grasped Riley's hand to give Jessie a small wave before disappearing into the crowd knowing full well that conversation wasn't over.
A short while later, Jessie found herself getting pulled out onto the dance floor by you. She grumbled in protest, but allowed you to push and pull her as you wished as you danced to whatever song was playing.
"You're my wife. You're supposed to be happy about dancing with me," you teased.
"I'm happy to be with you. I just don't like dancing," Jessie refuted as she half-heartedly tried to dance along, though was always half a beat - or more - behind.
"You didn't seem too bothered dancing with me when we were at that club on New Year's a few years back," you said with a glint in your eye. "Mind you, probably not appropriate for here."
Jessie's mind flashed back to you grinding up on her. In a sea of people, she was solely focused on you and how incredible you looked and that it was her you were with. True - not appropriate for here. She gave you a lopsided smirk either way.
"I wouldn't be opposed," she joked though her eyes raked up and down your body in appreciation. "And you look even more gorgeous than you did that night."
"Yeah?" You asked as you moved in close and Jessie wrapped her arms around your waist.
"You better cool it," Jessie warned in a murmur as her eyes drifted away. "I don't exactly need wedding photos of me sporting a boner."
You cleared your throat, drawing her eyes back to you. "Well, your daughter did ask for her light up running shoes. Those are back at the cabin."
Jessie's eyes studied you for a moment as a smile crept across her face.
"Oh. Well, we should definitely go get them. That's what good parents would do."
"Absolutely," you agreed.
You both looked around briefly to ensure no one was watching either of you too closely before Jessie grabbed you by the hand and led you out of the hall. The sun was setting as you two walked the paths back to the guest cabins. She retrieved the skeleton key from her pocket and showed it to you.
"And we can get into the honeymoon cabin this time," she told you proudly and you laughed, wrapping your arm around hers and cuddling in as you walked together towards the cabin.
You were kissing each other as you stumbled through the door and slammed it shut behind you.
"Pretty sure we're supposed to wait until the end of the night for this," you chuckled as Jessie was already starting to undo her dress pants.
"Well, we've done a lot of things out of order," she dismissed with a grin as she kissed your neck and guided you towards the couch. "And who's to say we're not going to do more later."
She kissed your lips and made sure the kiss didn't break as she took a seat on the couch and pulled you down on top of her. She bundled up your dress and lifted it so it was out of the way and she could have access to your underwear. She ran her fingers along the fabric and felt herself growing harder as she could feel the warmth and definition of your lips through the thin fabric.
"Fucking me during the reception," you teased as you kissed her deeper. "Gosh, I really am a terrible influence on you."
"Fuck no," Jessie disagreed with a wily smirk. "You're the best." She lifted you off of her to stand for a moment as she removed your underwear. She grinned as she tucked them into her pocket.
"I've created a monster," you joked as you pulled her cock out from her boxer briefs and straddled her waist once more, bracing yourself on her shoulders as you held yourself up as she poised herself at your entrance.
She ran the thick head of her cock against your entrance, getting it coated in your juices before she began to gently nudge at it and push inside. She moaned in pleasure as your tunnel slowly welcomed her, enveloping her length as she inched inside of you.
"Fuck. I'm so glad I can ditch the condoms again. God." She exhaled through her mouth as she looked you up and down. "Nothing feels as good as being inside of you like this. Nothing between us."
"God," you said as you tossed your head back and ran your fingers through her hair as you sunk down onto her and slowly rose back up. "I'm not kidding you - I've soaked through these panties more than once today thinking about last night. That was so fucking sexy."
Jessie growled as she began kissing down your neck and as much of your chest as your dress would allow.
"I noticed you're not drinking tonight," Jessie commented. "Think I knocked you up that fast?"
"You did last time," you chuckled as you began to ride her at a steady rhythm, her tip stretching out your entrance, teasing her, before swallowing her once more.
Jessie exhaled heavily - already feeling overwhelmed by the way you felt around her, the way you looked bouncing up and down in her lap - in your wedding dress no less - and the way your hands explored her.
"Y/N Fleming," she declared as she pulled you into a hard kiss. "Can't believe I've waited so long to make it official. To have you take my name." She rolled her hips up into you as she pulled you down into her lap. "Fuck. You're all mine."
"Oh God," you whimpered, head thrown back once more and eyes closed. "I'm yours. And you're mine."
"Always," she affirmed with zero hesitation. Her mouth hung open as she worked to steady her breath. She could feel blood rushing to her face and knew her cheeks were red with exertion. She shook her head. "I can't believe there was ever a time before you."
"Same, baby," you reciprocated as you looked down at her, cupping her face as you sensually rocked atop of her.
Despite your agreement, Jessie felt a rush go through her. She tightened her grip on your hips as began to buck up into you from below. She spoke through nearly clenched teeth.
"I hate that anyone was ever with you," she said. "You were made for me. They didn't deserve you."
Your eyes fell shut again and you leaned into her, your hands gripping her shoulders. "Holy shit. No one's ever fucked me like you. Or loved me like you."
Jessie snickered smugly, the sound of her hips bouncing off of your thighs resounded loudly in her ears.
"Well no one could ever make me feel like you do. I'm so lucky I met you."
"Jess," you whimpered as your body collapsed into her and you held her tightly. "I love you so much."
Jessie grunted as you rode her, your walls flexing and massaging her in the most exquisite way. She began to buck into you faster and her breathing grew ragged. You clutched her and she looked up to see your own cheeks rosy and your mouth slightly open as you pleasured one another.
"I can't wait until I start swelling with your baby again," you panted and Jessie's eyes slammed shut to the point of wincing as she fought off her climax. She wanted you cumming all over her cock before she flooded you.
"Jesus Christ. You are so sexy. I couldn't keep my hands off you last time. I never can - but God you look incredible carrying my baby." She grunted as she nearly came. "My gorgeous wife. So fucking beautiful."
"Don't stop," you begged as your orgasm neared. She watched you steadily as your expressions changed and you panted and moaned.
"My gorgeous girl," Jessie praised. "You look perfect bouncing up and down on my cock like this. And soon you'll be walking around this wedding with my cum dripping down your legs."
"Oh shit," you gasped as you began to convulse around her cock. Your movements stilled, fingers digging into her shoulders as your orgasm shook you. The way your softness spasmed around her, Jessie had no hope of fighting off her climax further and let out a whining grunt as she released inside of you.
"Oh, fuck, Jessie," you panted as she began to rut into you, shooting string after string of her cum inside of you.
You collapsed in her arms on top of her as you both panted and worked to regain your breath.
When you finally went to climb off of her, you both maneuvered yourself in a way that tried to limit how much of her cum was going to spill out onto her pants. Even then, your disappearance from the reception was extended further as you both worked to clean the cum off her pants before you made your return. Eventually, you gave up and Jessie got changed into a different outfit - people would believe she wanted to get into something more comfortable. You followed suit and got changed as well.
You returned to the hall and though you both received a few comments about your costume changes, all in all your absence was met with minimal questioning. Riley was thrilled to get her light-up shoes and immediately went stomping around the dancefloor squealing with delight.
Jessie continued to mingle with friends and family, as did you, and the night wore on. But it was really only a matter of time until a familiar cry soared over the music and din of the crowd.
Jessie frowned, excusing herself from a conversation and headed in the direction of her daughter's cries. She spotted you navigating the crowd and you caught each other's eye. When you both found Riley, she was red in the face, tears staining her cheeks as her grandparents tried to soothe her.
"What's going on?" Jessie asked as she approached, kneeling down in front of her as her dad bounced Riley on his knee.
"She just started asking for you both and got upset that you weren't here," he answered.
"Oh, Ri," Jessie said as she picked up her daughter and began to bounce her in her arms. She looked to her dad. "She's probably just tired. I know she had a nap, but it's been a big day." She looked down at Riley and spoke softly, "Are you tired, sweetie?" Riley wailed louder, her little hands bundling Jessie's shirt in their grasps, but as Jessie kissed her forehead her cries tapered. "I know it's been a long day. I understand - I need a break, too," she chuckled. "You've done so well."
Riley sniffled, her little shoulders hitching as her cries ebbed. Jessie signaled to her parents that she'd handle it. She and you took Riley over to a quiet corner of the hall. Jessie sat down, resting Riley in her lap and kissed the top of her head.
"She should really go down for bed," you said as you rubbed her back.
"Her and me both," Jessie said dryly with a smirk. "I'm exhausted." You played with her hair and kissed her cheek.
"And you didn't get a nap," you joked and Jessie gave you a playful sidelong glance. You rest your head on her shoulder. "Are we allowed to leave before the guests?"
"I think that's a bit of a faux pas, but honestly, I'm very tempted," she said as she eyed the room and contemplated the option. She looked down at Riley whose eyes were heavy as the toddler hung onto the precipice of sleep. She then glanced over at you. "I mean, everyone here knows neither you or I are big partiers. And, we have a toddler to look after..."
You chuckled, tucking a strand of Jessie's hair behind her ear. "I mean, your parents are happy to look after Riley and she's supposed to be staying with them again tonight."
"But she wants us," Jessie said with a pointed glance downward at their daughter who was resting very peacefully in her arms now. "Clearly."
You leaned over and kissed Jessie's cheek. "You know? I'm sure everyone will forgive us if we duck out."
------
A short while later, Riley was asleep in the middle of the king size bed in your cabin with Jessie laying next to her in a t-shirt and shorts, you climbing into bed in your pyjamas on the opposite side.
"Is this what you would've pictured for your wedding night years ago?" You teased as you lay propped on your side looking across Riley and over at Jessie who mirrored your position.
"Stone cold sober, party still raging on at the reception, and my toddler fast asleep between me and my new wife?" She asked with a lopsided grin, her head in her hand. "No. But I adore it." You snickered and gently pushed down Riley's rogue curls as she slept.
"Same," you said.
"We have a beautiful family and we're very lucky," Jessie mused as she carefully leaned over to give you a chaste kiss. You smiled into it and laid a hand on your stomach as Jessie pulled back.
"And maybe there'll be four of us soon enough."
A/N: That's all, folks! I can't thank you enough for joining me on this ride. What started as a one-shot I was super nervous to post, has been embraced by so many of you and you've allowed me to create and share this love story with you all. It truly means so much. Thank you!
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Stars
“You’re okay,” Benji whispers, tucking the ends of the blanket under your shoulders. His hands slide down your body, palms spread wide over your ass cheeks as he gently moves you up and down on his cock. Just the gentlest, kindest of thrusts. “We’re just gonna hang out like this until you’re feelin’ better, sound good?”
Tags - smut, incest, benji is your cousin, unspecified legal age gap, dubcon by way of intox, weed usage, fingering, cockwarming, unprotected piv, creampie, benji talks you through it, greening out, benji’s all soft and lovey and gentle and patient and a good caretaker, you're a lightweight lol, friends to lovers but make it so, so wrong and weird but also sweet and soft. 5.6k words. A/N - hiiii culkinfuckers :) takin' benji out for a spin :) this is my first fic with him and idk. It’s like oddly special to me. everybody be gentle with me please or else i will cry. i know this is like weird and sweet. shut up.
It’s way too fucking late when Benji’s name pops up on your phone, along with that silly picture of him and yourself you set as his contact photo. It’s many years old now but it remains your favorite: you and him in a tree at a park. Benji was probably fifteen, sitting on a sturdy branch. You were little enough that you could stand barefooted on his shoulders, holding on tightly to a branch above him.
You remember that day fondly. You remember giggling as your older cousin helped you down out of the tree, how he caught you when you jumped. You were soaking wet by the end of the day, and there were little pieces of thin water in your sandals from the water balloons Benji would throw at you. You hadn’t yet figured out how to tie them on your own.
You sigh, answering the phone. “Benji, what do you want?”
“Taco Bell,” Benji replies cheerfully.
You giggle at that. “Then go get your fucking Taco Bell,” you say, laughing. “It’s like–” you pull your phone away from your ear to check the time. “Oh, god. It’s 10:30. It’s so late, Benji.”
“Yeah, I’ll get my fucking Taco Bell, thank you very much. But you’re coming with, so c’mon. I don’t wanna wait in that long ass line all alone.”
“Benj–”
“I’ll give you the aux, alright? Be my fuckin’ DJ or some shit. Just…come out with me.” Benji pauses, “I know you’re not busy. Right? Watching some fucking bullshit reality TV?” He smiles at the groan you let out, a groan that gets louder when he honks the horn of his car, indicating that he’s outside. He giggles at how you hang up without saying goodbye.
You pull a hoodie over your tank top and slide on some old, beat up knock off Birkenstocks, then join Benji in his little red sedan. As promised, the aux cord is in your seat. It’ll remain unused as you and Benji fill the silence with chatter, not music.
“Hi, Benji.”
“Hi, you.” Benji grins so wide and pulls you in for a hug, sniffing your neck. “Thanks for keeping me company.”
“Uh huh.”
Benji waits for you to click your seatbelt into place, then takes off toward Taco Bell, the same one you and he’s always frequented. The cars waiting in the line are the same cars here most Saturday nights around 10:30. There’s beauty in this routine, as silly as it is. No matter how much changes, you and Benji still have this. Still have each other.
Benji holds down the brake as he waits for the cars to inch their way forward. He’s got one hand on the steering wheel as he rests his head against his carseat, watching you with a heavy-lidded, loving gaze. Red and violet lights paint your face in the most gorgeous and colorful glow, highlighting every little detail he loves, that he’s loved for so many years now.
“What?”
“Nothing,” Benji says. “You look beautiful like this, dude. I don’t know. You’re just…yeah. You’re beautiful. Anyone tell you that lately?”
You roll your eyes, then turn your head to smile at him. “Ha ha,” you laugh sarcastically. “Yeah, okay, Benji. Under the light of the Taco Bell? Sure.”
But you don’t doubt he’s being genuine. Benji’s sincerity is something you’ve always loved and admired. He loves what he loves with his full heart, and he’s vocal about it. It’s refreshing, honestly. A lot of men seem to lose their empathy and soft-heartedness by his age, usually earlier. But it never seemed to happen to him.
“Oh, come on. Don’t fuckin’ be like that, alright? The fuckin’ brake lights are all red and…” Benji feels bashful now. He itches the back of his head, then faces forward again. “...whatever. Fuck off. You’re beautiful.”
Benji pulls the car forward and greets the voice taking his order. “Whatcha want?” he whispers after the worker asks him to give her a minute, and you hum as you peruse the menu. “Mmm…just the Cinnabon things.”
“Ohhh, the ones that like, cum in your mouth?”
“Yeah, Benji. Those ones,” you giggle.
“Fuck yeah.” A vibration interrupts you then. Benji lifts his hips, bulge moving underneath his sweatshorts, and reaches into his pocket. He fumbles around for his phone, then answers the call, “Yo, Strider. What’s good?” he laughs, and lets Strider continue.
You have to laugh at the name. It’s such a friend of Benji name. You sort of know the guy he’s talking to. Met him in passing a few times. He’s alright.
“Awh, sweet. Yeah, yeah. I’m there. I’m bringing my cousin. You remember her, right? Few–few years younger,” Benji pauses, then laughs loudly. “Oh yeah. That’s her. Okay. Okay, yeah. See ya.”
Benji hangs up the phone and puts it back into his pocket. “Dylan’s in town so we’re getting together.”
“So you’re ditching me?”
“Nah, dude. You’re coming with me.” Benji watches your face fall, and can practically hear your heart beginning to beat out of your chest. He knows it’s not your type of function. “Listen. I know you’re not like, the best at social shit and whatever but you know all these people, right?”
“Hardly, Benji. They’re your friends, they’re all like–like I don’t know them.”
“Yes, you do. You do,” Benji says.
Know is a very loose term. You remember them from your childhood, sure. Benji’s graduation party and whatever. The names Dylan and Strider do ring a bell. Benji always had a bunch of friends, a bunch of very cool friends. At least, you thought they were cool. You remember his girl friends who’d hang out with you and do your hair and paint your little fingernails. Maybe they’ll be there.
“If you fucking hate it, we will leave. No questions asked,” he promises. “Deal?”
You bite your lip as you weigh your decision, then ultimately agree to go. “Deal.” Benji takes a hand off of the wheel and spits into his palm, prompting you to do the same. You spit too, then cringe at the feeling of his warm, wet palm. “We are too old to still be doing that,” you giggle.
“No fuckin’ way. We’ll be spit shaking forever.”
Benji orders your food and his, then a party pack of whatever large medley of items Taco Bell sells in one neat, sizable box. A couple of Baja Blasts to match, just for you and him.
Benji takes you to Strider’s house, a house you vaguely remember from your childhood. It’s a little out of the way and sort of buried in the woods, and there’s cars parked haphazardly all over the property. Your heart pounds as you carry in the food while following behind Benji, listening to the music get louder and clearer. As you enter through the garage, a man notices you and Benji and holds the door open for you both, and smiles kindly. “Just set the shit down–yeah, there you go.”
A tall guy with a baseball cap on backwards cheers as he greets you, IPA in hand. He hugs you tightly, thanking you loudly for bringing Taco Bell. You’re his savior, he tells you drunkenly. One of the last true good samaritans of this world.
“A, it was me who bought the fucking Taco Bell and B, give her some fucking space, Strider.”
“Awh, my bad.” Strider lets you go, and his face splits into a smile. “I totally remember you!” he says loudly, warmly, pushing you toward the door that leads to the back deck. You look to Benji for reassurance, and he’s right behind you, keeping nearby.
It’s nice to catch up with Strider. As you talk with him, you remember him a little better. It’s funny how that happens. More people join in, faces you recognize and faces you don’t, but it’s okay. A lot of them seem interested in you and ask you questions about yourself, tell you stories, keep you fed and happy. And Benji’s right there, close enough to touch, always watching out for you.
At some point, Strider offers you some weed. You’re feeling good and confident, so you take him up on it. When he leaves to roll a joint inside the house, Benji taps you on the shoulder and shakes his head.
“What, Benj?”
“Yeah, no. You don’t want Strider’s shitass weed, okay. You want mine.”
“Your shitass weed?”
“No, my–fuck off. C’mon,” he says, taking your hand and helping you out of your chair. “You smoke my shit. Okay? That’s the–that’s the fuckin’ rule.”
“Okay, Benj.”
No fucking way Benji’s letting his baby cousin smoke someone’s sketchy weed. He leads you down the deck steps and around the side of the house, finding a nice place alone with you on the porch, alone and safe.
Benji pulls a joint from behind his ear, which you’d somehow not even noticed before. He puts it between his lips and cups a hand around the end as he lights it, inhales deeply, and sighs as he exhales. “There ya go,” he says, passing you the joint.
You turn the joint in your fingers, watching the end glow red. You bring it to your lips, hesitant to inhale, and settle with simply holding it. You don’t know why. It just makes you a little nervous right now, finally being confronted with it.
“Gimme that if you’re gonna fuckin’ waste it,” Benji says, motioning for you to pass it back to him. “You don’t have to smoke if you don’t want to.”
“No, no. I do, I just…yeah, sorry. I don’t know.”
“Don’t know what?” You shrug, smiling to yourself. It doesn’t take long for Benji to read between the lines, and he nods while taking another puff. “C’mere.”
“Why?”
“‘Cause I’m gonna corrupt you, that’s why. Now c’mere a second.” Benji pulls you close by putting a hand around your waist, then takes another hit of the joint. He moves the hand on your waist to your chin, bringing your face close to his. He pulls on your chin and parts your lips to press his own against, then feeds his breath into your lungs.
You’re on fire. Lungs burning, cheeks burning too. You pull away from Benji as you smirk and cough, giggling at the forbidden pleasure you’d be lying if you said you didn’t crave.
“Whatcha smilin’ about over there, hm?” Benji taps his beat up shoe against yours.
“You kissed me,” you murmur through little coughs, avoiding his gaze.
“No, I shotgunned you. There’s a difference,” Benji says. “But I can kiss you, if that’s what you want.”
“I don’t think you’re supposed to.”
He shrugs, smiling in his own mischievous way. “I’m not a rat,” he says softly, “And I’m not gonna kiss you if you don’t want me to. You are more than welcome to lay one on me, though. Ball’s in your fuckin’ court, okay?”
Benji knows you’re thinking about it. Staring at him, chewing on your bottom lip as you stare at his. It’s wrong and it’s icky, but there’s something special about sharing a kiss with him. Your built-in best friend, the one who waited so excitedly for you to grow up and be big enough to be able to play with him. He’s seen you at every stage of your life, and been by your side for it, too. He’d let you watch him play those old Resident Evil games that gave you nightmares and would hug you to sleep at night. Snuck you your first sips of alcohol when he turned twenty-one and you were still many years away from the legal drinking age.
Thick as thieves. You and Benji were never complicated by drama or whatever other stupid shit drives people away from each other. Blood is thicker than water, sometimes. It is with you and him, at least.
“Gonna rip off the bandaid or what, dude? I’m on pins and needles over here.”
You shy away from it, though Benji knows how bad you want it. He wants it too, though he feels the need to be responsible, to take care of you. A part of him just likes to tease. He always did, anyway.
He puffs on his joint and pulls you close again, forcing the smoke into your lungs. It rises between your faces on your exhale, the wisps breaking as he keeps his lips close to yours. He kisses you just a little, pressing his soft, smirking lips against yours, slipping his tongue into your mouth just so. When you reciprocate, Benji pulls back and takes another puff, repeating it all. He does this a few more times until you’re all giggly and lightheaded, be it from the weed or the secret, subtle kisses he stole. They don’t really count, right?
You separate from him as some friends approach, chatting up each other and Benji. The joint is passed from person to person as you all catch up, and Benji keeps a subtle hold on you with his hand on your back, gently scratching his fingers. He smokes idly with his friends, laughing and coughing as they talk about something funny that happened inside. Someone passes you the joint, urging you to take a hit.
“See how you feel, okay?” Benji murmurs, squeezing your side comfortingly. “You don’t have to–”
You take a long drag, much longer than you should. And you’re not sure what compels you to do it. Nobody gives a shit if you do or don’t smoke but yourself. And you’re already feeling decently, pleasantly buzzed, so it’s not like you needed much more.
This is how it’s always gone, isn’t it? You’d scrape your knees on the asphalt at age four trying to keep up with Benji, who was heads taller than you at that point. Riding your bike without training wheels and biting the curb miserably at age six, because Benji didn’t have training wheels. Laughing at the jokes he’d make you didn’t yet understand when you were ten. Copying the way he talked, the way he dressed. He was always so patient with you, so charmed and endeared by you. So proud. You’re his fucking girl, trying to keep up with him. Born too late.
“Aaaaand dibs on finishing it. I’ll take that, thanks.” Benji swipes the joint from you and smokes the last of it, then stubs the roach out on the deck. You wobble a little as you find a place to sit, a nice swinging bench. Benji sits next to you and pulls you close, rocking the two of you together.
“Havin’ fun?”
“Yeah,” you whisper, resting on his shoulder. Benji takes your hand in his, rubbing his thumb in circles over the back of yours. It starts to feel a little funny, but good. You watch his thumb move around and around, listening to his steady breathing as you float higher and higher. “I love you, Benji.”
“Aw, I love you too, man.” Benji kisses the back of your hand, then the side of your head. “So much.”
It’s just perfect, being alone with him right here, gently swinging back and forth on someone’s bench, on someone’s porch. You don’t know. You’re just high, and happy to be with your best friend. You could stay here the rest of the night, just enjoying the quiet little moment together.
But that’s not what you’re here for. Benji taps you twice on the knee and stands up, takes your hand and leads you back into the house. When you start to walk is when it all hits you, just how pleasantly high you are. Giggling as you stumble a bit, tripping over nothing. Oh, it’s fucking hitting you. It’s hitting you hard. Benji finds a quiet room and sits you on a ratty old sofa. “Stay there,” he instructs. “I’m gonna find somewhere to piss. You gonna be good?”
“So good,” you giggle.
“Good. Okay. I’ll be back.”
Benji squeezes you twice on the shoulder before he leaves you, and you follow him with your eyes as he searches for a bathroom. When you lose sight of him as he turns a corner, you look for something else to keep you occupied. There’s artwork on the walls, a dull hum of music coming from somewhere else, and…
…A little white cat. It’s just around the corner, and it trills at you as its tail curves back and forth in little question mark shapes. You stand up and follow it, feeling like a ghost as you float through the house. It leads you to the living room where a couple of people are cuddled up on couches, watching a movie you don’t yet recognize. Someone offers you a seat on the couch, but you wave them off and sit on the floor with the cat instead.
The cat trills and purrs, then flops on its back in your lap, exposing its belly to you. You giggle as you pet it and tease it with your hand, playing a game you know is dangerous. Whatever. Benji will kiss your cat scratch better if you happen to procure one. He’ll probably have a bandaid handy too, somehow.
There’s a basket of toys to your left, so you pick a teaser up and watch the cat dance as it follows the colorful feathers. You wonder if there’s any treats you can give the cat, if anyone knows where they’d be. It’s such a beautiful cat, with its long hair, and its big blue eyes. It reminds you of Duchess from the Aristocats.
“Oh, Jesus. There you are.” Benji looks relieved as he walks over to you and crouches in front of you, checking in. “Your ass is fuckin’ covered in fur, look at you,” he murmurs, picking off little tufts of the cat’s hair as he smiles. “You gonna be alright with your little buddy here?”
“M’okay,” you grin.
Benji holds his hand in front of the cat’s face, giving it a second to sniff, then scratches under its chin. “Okay. Good.” Benji stands up, groaning as his knees crack, then bends down to kiss your head. “I’m gonna be right outside, okay? You come get me if you need anything.”
You watch as Benji leaves, just heading right out and down the steps of the deck, vanishing in the darkness. You turn your attention back to the cat, who seems to be getting frustrated with the toy. It’s no longer purring, and now slapping its tail on the ground. “What’s the matter?” you murmur softly, petting the cat between its ears. It reaches up and scratches you, then leaves you. “Fucker,” you mumble, watching blood pool on your finger. You wipe it away quickly, then suck on your finger to try and soothe the sting.
It starts to feel bad here. The dread accelerates quickly, worsening exponentially. It starts with some scene on the TV you find unpleasant. And maybe it’s not even meant to be particularly upsetting, but it is. Some things are like that. Benji’s kind of the same way with shit, like with the movie A Christmas Story. It’d always be on at holidays and he fucking hated every second of it. The tongue stuck to the frozen pole, all the screaming, whatever.
You wish you could tell him how upset you are all of a sudden. He’d understand. But he’s…he’s wherever he is, in the dark. You don’t wanna go looking for him and end up lost in this house that you know nothing about, with a bunch of strangers.
You glue yourself to the couch as the anxiety sets in. You try to talk yourself out of it - you were just having a good time, what the fuck happened? Why are you so upset? You’re not upset, no. You’re just…it’s just a bad moment. And it’s gonna pass, just like every other bad moment.
You’re not sure how much time passes when the sliding glass door opens and in comes Benji with a relaxed smile on his face. He finds you right where he left you, only now, you’re upset. You’re watching the TV, the skin on your cheeks all shiny with tears as you quietly cry and sniffle.
Benji holds your shoulders as he crouches down, meeting you on your level. “Woah, hey. Hey, what happened? What happened,” he asks quietly, wiping your tears with the sleeve of his maroon hoodie.
“Nothing,” you whisper, voice thick with tears. “I don’t know. I just…I’m too high, I think. It doesn’t feel fun anymore. I don’t know what happened.”
Benji nods, rubbing your shoulders. “Stoned to the bone, huh?” he laughs.
“Fuck. Yeah.”
“Oh, man. It’s okay, dude. It happens.” Benji smiles warmly, comfortingly. “But where’d your friend go, hm? The little fuckin’ fuzzy guy.”
You shrug, sniffling. Benji wipes your snot with his sleeve. “I dunno. But he scratched me,” you tell him, holding up your finger. “See?”
“Yeah, he got ya.” Benji takes your finger between two of his own and examines it, brows knitting together as he looks at your scratch. He hums to himself, then kisses it. “Better?”
“Still stings.”
Benji takes both of your hands and stands up, then lifts you up to your feet. “We’re gonna go get some air, okay?”
“Okay. Yeah, that’s good.”
“You wanna go sit by a fire? It’s all nice and quiet. And warm,” he adds, rubbing your cold hands. “C’mon, dude.”
Benji walks you out the door, ignoring everyone saying hi to you both. You hope nobody notices you crying. If you asked Benji, he’d tell you they’re all too drunk to notice.
Just a short walk away from the deck is a bonfire out in the open yard, surrounded in those folding camping chairs and a futon, which doesn’t make sense to your poor, stoned brain, but wouldn’t make much sense if you were sober, either. There’s a blanket draped over it, too.
Benji drops onto the couch, pulling you with him. You curl up into his side and watch the fire, trying to find comfort in its warmth and the way the wood crackles. There’s a couple of people sitting around, quietly talking amongst themselves, waving hello to you both. Benji picks up a conversation with them, which serves as a nice distraction. Listening to the calming timbre of Benji’s voice through his ribs, the comforting weight of his arm on your side as you stare into the fire. The way your head rises and falls on his chest as he breathes or laughs. It’s distracting until it’s not.
You tug on his hoodie. “Benji?”
“Yeah?”
You lift up, urging him to tilt his ear to you. “The fire’s freaking me out,” you whisper, realizing how silly it sounds as the words slip past your lips. You don’t elaborate further, but you’re seeing like…faces and shit in there. You don’t know. It’s fucking weird, everything’s weird.
“Holy fuck, okay,” he laughs. “Just close your eyes, okay, stoney?”
“It’s not funny, Benj.”
“No, it’s not. And nobody’s laughing at you. It’s just us, yeah? Go on, close your eyes. And give me your hand.”
You snuggle into Benji’s side as he takes your hand in his, and simply traces around your fingers with his. It’s a gentle tickle, a pleasant feeling. There’s something so grounding about feeling his hand on yours, that simple act.
It extends to your palm, where he caresses his fingers along the lines there like he’s reading it. And then to your wrists, where he’s rubbing over that tendon. He’s so very delicate with you as he touches you, soothes you. “Does this feel good?” he murmurs.
You nod, burying your face into his neck. Benji runs his warm hands up your arm, then down again. Your sides are next, and then your legs, your ass.
Benji’s hand slips beneath your shorts and panties, and he pushes the fabric to the side. “Yeah,” you moan, too high to give a shit about what this looks like, and it all feels too good to care. It gets your mind off the scary things, that feeling of dread.
“Shhh.” Benji kisses your forehead. “Lay down.”
You lie down, resting your head in his lap. Benji leans over you and grabs the blanket, laying it over your body. One of his hands trails down your stomach and past your clothes, where he rubs his fingers up and down your lips. You part your legs a little, sighing when you feel his middle finger press against your clit. “Benji,” you moan.
Rather than telling you to be quiet again, Benji covers your mouth with his other hand. He keeps his hand there as his other rubs your clit slowly, patiently, working you up. He keeps talking with his friends, laughing at their jokes. You whimper as his fingers idly drag up and down your seam, feeling yourself becoming wetter and wetter.
He grunts and leans closer to you, pushing two fingers in and out of your cunt before he curls them repeatedly, although slowly. He’s not trying to get you off here, no. Just pleasure you enough to keep your mind off of the scary things, give you that sweet, enjoyable feeling to keep you from feeling bad stuff. It’s not about making you moan or making your heart pound. It’s just a distraction.
Benji’s growing hard under your head. He catches your hand as you reach for his bulge, putting it back down at your side. “Is that what you want?” he asks. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you whisper, nodding.
“Okay. Hop up.”
Benji keeps himself covered with the blanket as you slide into his lap, collapsing in his arms. He tugs the blanket out from under you and wraps it around your shoulders, smoothing out the fabric before reaching between your bodies for his cock. He spits into his palm and then jerks himself fully erect and while keeping your panties and shorts to the side, notches his tip at your entrance. You whine his name as he pushes you down, thrusting his hips to fit himself deeper inside. God, that stretch, the tickle of his bush against your clit. It’s exactly what you needed. You almost want to cry at the relief you feel.
And you’re feeling embarrassed because he was right - you shouldn’t have tried to keep up with him. Now look at yourself, straddling Benji’s lap, way too fucking high. His cock nestled inside you, twitching now and then. He’s got a hand on the back of your neck, scratching the bottom of your scalp soothingly. Benji presses your mouth against his shoulder, muffling your sighs and whimpers.
You’re tugging on the soft, red fleece of his hoodie, arms wrapped tightly around his neck. Benji taps you twice, coughing a little. “Hey - I’m not going anywhere. You can loosen up, alright?” You sniffle and nod, letting up on your hold of him. “Attagirl. You’re okay, man. You're okay. Promise ya.”
Benji turns to quickly kiss your cheek, and you wish you didn’t find the tickle of his beard on your skin so overstimulating. “Benji.”
When it falls, he tugs the flannel blanket up, smoothing it over your back as he rubs your shoulders. Your body feels warm, buzzing with the high, inhaling the scent of Benji’s skin and the smoke from the bonfire. It’s getting better, but you don’t know why it all felt so bad all of a sudden. Nothing’s wrong, really. And Benji’s got you safe in his arms, so everything should be fine. You’re just a little out of sorts, maybe. Like he said, it happens.
“Yo, man. She good?”
The voice sounds distant and too close all at the same time. Benji shifts, looking up at the guy. “Huh? Oh, yeah. She’s fine.” He holds you close against his body with his left arm, and brings the other to his face, mimicking smoking a joint with his thumb and pointer finger. He makes a face and adds another gesture, and the guy understands. Ahhhh. Gotcha. “How about you grab her something to drink, man?”
“Uh…”
“Not like that, dude. Just like, a soft drink. Ginger ale or some shit. And a snack.” Benji speaks to you then, his voice soft. “Somethin’ you wanna eat?”
“Mmm,” you hum, though it comes out as more of a moan, “Just something…something. I don’t know, maybe an apple.”
“An apple?” Benji asks, “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Want it like, sliced up and shit? With a little peanut butter, maybe?”
“Yes, please.”
Benji looks at his friend. “You heard ‘er. Apples and peanut butter, please and thank you.”
“Oh, yeah, sure.”
Who knows if that guy will return. If not, Benji will take care of it himself. But you seem to be alright for the time being.
“You’re okay,” Benji whispers, tucking the ends of the blanket under your shoulders. His hands slide down your body, palms spread wide over your ass cheeks as he gently moves you up and down on his cock. Just the gentlest, kindest of thrusts. “We’re just gonna hang out like this until you’re feelin’ better, sound good?”
“Maybe…I think I wanna go home, Benji.”
“Oh, man, I know. But neither one of us is good to drive right now. So we're gonna stay right here,” he grunts quietly, pulling you down on his lap again. “I’m gonna keep you all to myself. Shhh. You hear those owls?”
“I hear…” you trail off, taking inventory of what you can listen to. The distant chatter of the other partygoers, Benji’s breathing. And, “I hear crickets.”
“Mm, yeah. But there’s owls, too, dude. Y’just gotta listen.”
Benji chuckles as you rest against him, your walls squeezing around his flexing cock. He can feel you dripping into his lap, and he wonders if you realize this. Wonders if you want to be fucked, or if warming his cock is all you need to feel okay right now.
“I think I heard it,” you tell him. “It was kinda quiet, though.”
“Yeah?” Benji’s about to speak again when someone interrupts him, asking if you and he need some space for a while. “Yeah man, thanks. Just for a minute.”
He smiles kindly and waves goodbye as people leave, and now it really is just you two. He stays inside of you as he lifts up and turns the two of you, laying you down on the futon. “Ohh, yeah. There we go,” he groans, rocking his hips into you. Benji looks at you then, watching how you watch the sky. “Oh, cool. Are you lookin’ at the stars?”
“Yeah,” you answer, focusing on the twinkling lights. You find it so calming as Benji fucks you, something so pretty to look at as you come back to earth. It was right here the whole time, too.
“You see the Big Dipper?” Benji pants, pulling out of you. He pushes back into you so deliciously slowly and intentionally, rubbing the head of his cock against the place that has you squeezing him tighter and babbling incoherently. “Fuckin’...Ursa…whatever the fuck?”
“I don’t know what that one looks like,” you giggle, wrapping your arms and legs around his body. You sigh as he fucks you, enjoying those sticky, wet sounds you make together.
“Yeah, well. Me either,” Benji laughs, punctuating the sentence with a rather hard thrust. He buries his face in your neck and kisses you there as he fucks you quietly, letting out a little groan or sigh now and then. He just gives you what you need, and doesn’t ask for anything in return. “Oh, fuck, yeah. You feel so fuckin’ good.”
He giggles at the way you moan louder when he rolls his hips in his practiced way, brushing his pubic hair against your clit. That delicious friction inches you closer and closer to the edge, and Benji urges you to lean into it.
“You gonna cum, maybe?”
“I - yeah, I think so,” you breathe.
“Cum for me,” he tells you. “It’s okay, dude. Just let go.”
You hold onto Benji tight as you cum on his cock, moaning his name in broken syllables as the sweetest, most satisfying pleasure washes over you from head to toe, so intense and beautiful. Benji lets himself cum at that moment too, taking advantage of the frenetic way your cunt pulses around him, gushing with your arousal. You feel the aftershocks in time with your heartbeat, loving that little reminder of what just took place.
Benji pulls out of you and tugs your damp panties and shorts back into place, only to be further soaked by his mess of spend. He tucks himself back into his shorts and lifts your head, then sits down, letting you rest in his lap again.
You’re not feeling as high anymore. Still high, but back to that pleasant, gentle buzz, just watching the stars.
“I see your name, Benji.”
Benji raises his eyebrows as he looks down at you. “Yeah? In the stars?”
“Mhm.”
“Show me, then.”
You point at the sky as Benji tilts his head back, squinting at the stars. “I see a B, like a lowercase B,” you tell him.
“Uh huh. Okay.”
“E,” you add.
“I see the E,” Benji says, pointing to the same collection of stars as you.
“And J and I. Right there.”
Benji laughs loudly. He has no clue what you’re pointing to, either. “You forgot the N, dumbass.”
“I did?”
“Yeah. B E N J I,” he spells, touching your nose with his finger. “But it’s cool, man. We’ll find an N somewhere in there.”
“And my name,” you insist.
“Oh, I already found that shit.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, but I’m not telling you where,” Benji giggles, looking back up at the stars with you.
#benji kaplan#Benji Kaplan x reader#Benji Kaplan x reader smut#Benji Kaplan smut#a real pain#kieran Culkin#kieran Culkin x reader#kieran culkin x reader smut
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shackled.

Pairings: arlecchino x fem!reader
CW: sfw, female reader, arranged marriage, arle referred to as your husband, use of her real name, idk if this is angst so I’ll tag it as angst and fluff, wlw, I actually fucking hate arranged marriages irl but it’s interesting to write about, fun when it’s the character you like and not a 10 year old girl getting married to an ugly ass 60 year old man who gets no bitches, uhm anyway not proofread.
A/N: nobody gonna request arrange marriage? I’ll do it myself with my husband/husbwife arlecchino 🕯️
Uneven beats of your heart pulsed in your eardrums continuously as you stared out the open window, a cool breeze caressing your downcast face gently. Your pupils flickered down to your extended left hand, dilating smaller out of disdain upon catching sight of the cold silver ring encircling your ring finger.
You dreaded it. This arranged marriage parted an endless uncomfortable pit in your stomach, which you had felt would remain as long as you were trapped in a bind you didn’t want. Gazing down at ring once more, you couldn’t help but find it difficult to swallow the choked feeling in your throat whenever you laid eyes upon the ruby, nausea enveloping every possible sense you had in the moment. Rather than a promise ring that bound you to someone you loved, the one on your finger felt like a tiny silver collar clamped around your flesh. An irking feeling that forced you to love a stranger.
Yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to hate Arlecchino. The woman had actively attempted to respect your personal space, being able to tell how much you loathed the inescapable grasp of your arranged marriage. You could tell that she opposed even the thought of this, especially from the way her eyes would stare down at her own ring with an empty and unfeeling expression.
Sighing deeply, you reached an arm up to grasp the satin curtains, before tugging your arms inward in a single dynamic motion. As you turned your back to walk away from the now closed up windows, you felt a gust of light air brush against your nape, causing you to spin around and lower your eyes from slight annoyance. Right. You forgot to shut the windows first. You just went over to shut the windows, still harboring a hint of irritation. Ever since that marriage, you always tended to feel unwilling to do anything anymore. Frequently always irritated by the smallest of actions as you’d always think to yourself—what’s the point?
Upon closing up the windows completely, you fell back onto the intricately decorated sofa set situated in the corner of your shared bedroom, your mind still a cluttered mess from all your thoughts being scrambled rather than neatly arranged in an array. You began to ponder once more. How things could’ve been different. Ran away, or disobeyed your parents to a full extent.
There wasn’t anything you could do. You didn’t see a point in even trying to keep a happy front anymore. All of your aspirations that you had, every little dream, was now out of your reach as you were shackled into this marriage. The warm air of the heater hit your skin as you rested your cheek into your palm. A small smile made its way onto your lips as you mused at the possible scenarios that could’ve happened if you were free. Perhaps if you were wallowing in your delusion, you could smile atleast once.
“I’m home.”
You blinked from sudden surprise, jolting as the bedroom door creaked open—albeit a bit roughly. Arlecchino’s emotionless voice rang in your ears, had she called out upon entering before? She often enters the living room first, and doesn’t enter the bedroom until nightfall. Then again, you tend to reside in the living room to await your husband’s return, so maybe she simply wondered where you were.
Stray specks of blood decorated her cheek, scattering small splatters ranging in a variety of spots across her face. Right. She was the fourth harbinger after all. You folded your arms as Arlecchino towered over you, still standing upright while her x-marked eyes pierced into you. Shifting uncomfortably, you decided to clear your throat, gesturing towards your own cheek in an attempt to break the thick fog of tension between you two from the lack of words.
“You got some-“
“I’m aware.” Arlecchino replied coldly, making you bite back a scoff at the harbinger’s dismissive response. Well, excuse you for trying to make this shitty marriage more bearable.
Still, it didn’t seem intentionally rude although it did come off that way. You only looked away from her, eyes fixating on a random painting hung over the flower pot on one of the shelves. Hunching your shoulders, you bit down on your quivering lip subtly so that Arlecchino wouldn’t notice. Although you were the one that distanced yourself from her. Although you were the one who only focused on despising this marriage, rather than even trying to get closer to Arlecchino in the slightest for atleast a small hint of peace. It still hurt seeing your husband brush you off like this.
Her seemingly exhausted expression remained glued to her face as she dragged the folded white washcloth along her cheek, eyes staring at the ground aimlessly as she continued to clean her stained face. The weight of all of this had clearly taken a toll on her as well, yet she had to keep a sturdy front for the sake of her profession as a Fatui harbinger. Yet her actions regarding you had always been courteous and respectful. Consistently respecting your boundaries and trying her best to avoid making you feel uncomfortable must have taken a toll on her, especially knowing full well that your resentment for this marriage could have set you off at any given moment.
A sudden wave of sympathy flooded you upon seeing Arlecchino’s tired eyes, dark linings shaded below her eyes as well. Just maybe, you could try to repay her for having your comfort in mind throughout the course of this resented relationship. This relationship wasn’t her fault, and you knew that. She hated this just as much as you did.
Deciding to swallow your pride, you rose to your feet, standing before her as you awkwardly shifted for a couple moments while remaining standing there. Arlecchino paused her movements, raising an eyebrow at your sudden motion of getting up off the couch. She simply stared at you with a puzzled gaze, trying to figure out your sudden want to interact with her.
Hesitantly, you reached out a shaky hand, lining it up with her cheek and gesturing her to lean in. Arlecchino on the other hand, wasn’t expecting you to switch up suddenly like this, only keeping her skeptical gaze locked onto your own eyes. It felt like a trap to lean in to someone who was so hesitant to even look at her. No matter how badly she wanted to lean into the soft skin of your palm, her hesitance seemed to uphold her rationality despite her exhaustion.
“Arle…it’s okay, you can lean in…”
She needn’t be told twice as you felt her hand grab ahold of your wrist to keep it in place, her head nearly collapsing against your hand. Deep breaths echoed within the vicinity, her breaths cancelling every other noise around you two as Arlecchino slowly composed herself from your touch. She pulled back after a couple moments, her cold front faltering for a moment with a flash of tenderness, before immediately snapping back to her calm demeanor.
However, you didn’t stop there. You don’t know what flipped that switch in you, but you just felt the urge to grow closer to Arlecchino. Perhaps it was the realization that you weren’t alone in the hellhole of a marriage, and that you two may be suffering together. Knowing she hated this as much as you was comforting, it remedied your internal turmoil slightly, and made you detest the idea of anyone else going through what you were. Or maybe, it was the fact that Arlecchino didn’t push anything in this marriage, and respected you, preventing your mental state from growing worse. It could even be both.
Regardless, you wanted to atleast provide a sort of ease to her. Cupping her cheek once more, you pulled the washcloth from her hand, rubbing it against her cheek in circular motions as stains of blood began to soak up onto the cloth and coloring it red. Arlecchino didn’t seem to protest your attempt at soothing her, face pressing further into your shaky palm as it seemed to be working. The quiet buzz of the heater reverberating through the silence, and the general tidy atmosphere of the neatly arranged bed made everything feel so right. As if this marriage wasn’t so awful after all.
Arlecchino exhaled a swift sigh as you finished washing up her face, remaining silent. The two of you awkwardly awaited for the other to speak up, the crickets outside chirping louder than the two of you by this point. You finally decided to say something, face tinged a light pink from moderate embarrassment
“You didn’t want this either did you?”
Arlecchino shook her head in affirmation, her eyes still avoiding yours—as if she was afraid that your vulnerability would shift over to her, and shatter her calm self at this moment.
“I’m well aware of this situation. Your parents are already closely associated with the Fatui, and want wanted you to marry a harbinger in order to elevate their own status for the sake of the family.” She replied. A sour taste seeped onto your tongue at the mention of the reason why you were forced into this in the first place, unpleasant memories beginning to race through your mind for a few moments.
“Why did you accept the offer then? You could’ve easily declined if you didn’t want to be in this marriage either. There’s multiple other harbingers my parents would’ve auctioned me off to.” You said bitterly, strangely hating the idea of getting married to anyone who wasn’t Arlecchino at this point. Arlecchino merely shrugged in response, raising her shoulders to remove the white fur coat cloaking her and draping it neatly over the coat hanger drilled into the wall.
“I’m not sure.” She paused, taking some time to think over another answer to compensate for her vague response. “I believe I just felt it was necessary in that moment.”
You sighed back collapsing onto the mattress. Suddenly, you felt an arm circle your waist, pulling you closer as you felt Arlecchino push her torso flush against your back. Your face burned from the sudden intimate action, the warmth of her body only serving to make you lean into her further as her sharp nails raked along your stomach lightly. Arlecchino whispered out against you, visibly less uptight than when she came in. She was a bit more relaxed and clingy with you simply with a mere touch against her cheek, it was sweet honestly.
“I still care about you, (Name).” She muttered against your neck, voice muffled as she was evidently quite tired. Pale rays of the moonlight illuminated Arlecchino’s now eased expression, watching her eyes lowered shut as her exhaustion began to catch up with her. Surprisingly, you found yourself relishing in the comfort of her arms as you flipped onto your side facing her to examine her rested features.
“…I’m starting to care about you too, Peruere.”
Your hand drew down along her arm, all the way from the skin of her shoulder down to the black faded enveloping her arms from her curse. Maybe, just maybe, this could work. You found solace in the fact that you could make the best out of this marriage with a woman who kept you in mind and tried her best to care about your interests.
Maybe, you could warm up to her.
A/N: im screaming idk if this turned out good guys pls asaaawaabshshs but yayyyyy arlecchino MY CONTENT WARNINGS WERE ASS ON THIS ONE WHY ARE THEY SO BORING AND SAD ‼️
#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#genshin#genshin arlecchino x reader#arlecchino genshin x reader#genshin arlecchino#arlechinno x reader#arlecchino genshin#arlechinno genshin#arlecchino x reader#arlecchino#arleccino genshin#arlecchino x#genshin fanfic#genshin fluff#peruere#peruere x reader#arranged marriage#arranged marriage au#genshin au#arlecchino genshin impact#arlecchinno genshin impact#genshin wlw#wlw
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First Time

title : First Time
genre : bts smut, Jungkook smut, kpop smut, 21+ content, Frenemies to Lovers
pairing : Jungkook x Reader
warnings : doggystyle, spitting, choking, virginity - loss, cowgirl, missionary, name - calling, multiple orgasms, very dirty content
Summary :
“Never really had, practice .. i would like to see how this goes”
[Been off schedule, school’s been busy for me but I’m back on board! Every other saturday :)]
[ya’ll want a part 2 to Mr. Cocky?]
!PURELY FICTION! !NOT REAL!
do not steal story or idea without permission thank uu :)
Legoo
_________________________________________________
Y/N got out the car, walking up the 2 steps that led the walk way to the modern house. She took a breath before walking the walkway and took a breath before ringing the doorbell. Y/N looked around nervously, heart beating at the thought of becoming face to face with- “Who would’ve known, Jung Y/N would be knocking at my door” Y/N went out her thoughts, facing the tall man who was smirking down at her.
She cleared her throat, shaking her nerves as she pushed her shoulders back to show no weakness. “Unfortunately .. is Hoseok here?” Jungkook opened the door further for her to come inside to see her shirtless brother coming out the kitchen. “Hey lil girl, what you doing here” “Nothing just checking on you, guess who tried to become aggressive today” “AGAIN?!” Jungkook’s voice echoed in the large living room as the siblings faced him.
“Yes .. but it’s fine guys-“ “No Y/N i’m sick of this shit now! Didn’t he learn from the last time!?” “Kook calm, we’ll talk to him” “I’m doing more then talking, he’s not getting away with this shit I hope you know that” Jungkook said, looking at Y/N. She sighed, pushing her hands in her pockets. “Better to tell you then to find a mark or something” “HUH!?” “JUNGKOOK” Jungkook huffed at Hoseok’s shout, rolling his eyes. “Are you ok?” “Yes I’m fine” Y/N responded to Hoseok’s soft concern as he walked himself towards the big table.
Y/N grabbed the strength to turn to Jungkook and say the words she’s been wanting to say. “Jungkook, i need to talk to you” Jungkook faced Y/N’s nervous state, raising his eyebrow. “What?” “It’s important!” Jungkook sighed, feeling the energy as he slowly walked towards the coat rack and swung the puffer coat on him. “Come on” Jungkook responded softly, going out the door and Y/N looked at Hoseok who sat down on the couch, smirking at the two.
“Go get em sista” Hoseok teased, chuckling as Y/N rolled her eyes and went out the door following Jungkook. They both got inside, sighing as the two looked at each other. “You wanna tell me what was so important” “I didn’t think you’d wanna hear it .. now i gotta grab the courage” Jungkook hummed, turning the heater on low as it was cold. “Well while you learn how to stop being a scaredy, i wanna know .. when are you ever gonna get another man” Y/N got caught off guard, gulping at the question.
“Well, i’m leaving him just so you know. I’m not sure when God will grant me another man, but i’m not rushing. It’s not necessary” “I can’t tell .. from the looks of it you gon be the 60 year old with 10 black cats” Y/N glared at the laughing man beside her as she pulled out a chuckle herself. “Whatever … and that’s not gonna happen. I’m just .. waiting patiently” Jungkook hummed, admiring her beauty from the side.
Jungkook was going through it.
“Well .. I offered to hook you up with one of my friends you didn’t want that” “Because he’s a HOE! He messed with almost every single damn girl in the area! Including MY FRIENDS! I don’t want that” Jungkook chuckled, leaning back in his seat. “I hear you” “And besides .. no one’s, gentle these days” Jungkook’s eyebrows furrowed, eyes darting towards Y/N as she looked toward nervously.
“Gentle?” “I-I .. don’t believe anyone in the generation is gentle.. you know, gentle” “No, i don’t know. Elaborate” Jungkook knew exactly what he was doing. And Y/N couldn’t stand it. “You know what the hell I mean” “I’m not sure, that’s why i said elaborate” Jungkook was enjoying this. “Gentle .. sex, gentle” Jungkook hummed, his expression softening. “Well .. what makes you say that?” Y/N grabbed every ounce of confidence in her body and faced Jungkook.
“Do you have - I don’t know - .. experience?” Jungkook raised an eyebrow at the question, clearing his throat. “Well, unfortunately, I do. Very, young age. I rather not open up about that but , it’s nothing i’ve enjoyed” Y/N’s face loosened, humming as she felt for Jungkook. “I’m sorry .. you ok?” “Nah yea i’m cool, just I haven’t really enjoyed .. ‘Sex’. Didn’t really get a chance to feel it” Y/N hummed, catching herself from staring at the man.
Y/N felt something in her, this raging fire that wanted to pounce onto Jungkook. She’s never seen this vulnerable side of the man, knowing they were this thing called .. Frenemies. And she loved it.
“Well .. would you, enjoy? Having someone to enjoy it on?” Jungkook eyed Y/N, a heating sensation raising inside of him. “And how would that happen?” “U-Uhh .. well, I came to you because I was wondering if you would .. teach me, how to have sex” Jungkook’s mouth parted as the two individuals looked at each other. Jungkook was shocked. “You want me to take your first time?” “I-I mean yea! Why not you know - listen you were the only one I thought of .. look if you don’t want to that’s fine-“ Jungkook got a hold of her thigh, stopping her from leaving.
“Look at me” Y/N followed, looking into the hungry man’s eyes. “You trust me?” Y/N slowly nodded, not breaking eye contact. “You want me to take it” Y/N nodded again. “You’re gonna behave?” “I’ll t-try?” Jungkook looked at her, making Y/N gulp at the intensity. “Y-Yes .. i’ll behave” Jungkook hummed. “Alright” Jungkook faced her fully. “You know how to kiss?” “N-No” “Just try alright? No tongue .. just follow the flow” Y/N nodded and they both leaned in, slowly connecting their lips together.
“Gentle alright?” Jungkook said through the kiss, making her hum in understanding. They kissed for a while before slowly breaking it, having Y/N wait impatiently for feedback. “H-How did I do”’Jungkook didn’t know what to say, in shock at what just happened. “D-Did I not do good i’m sorry-“ “Wait wait wait .. this you’re first time?” Y/N was token back, nodding at the question leaving Jungkook speechless. “O-Ok .. you wanna try tongue?” Y/N nodded once again, and they both did a round two, starting gentle but quickly picked up the space.
“Ok enter” Y/N entered her tongue, feeling Jungkook’s inside of her mouth causing her to moan softly at the contact. They did it for a while before breaking it leaving Jungkook speechless once again. “Was that good?” Jungkook, again, was speechless and had nothing to say. He was going crazy.
And he, was going crazy as well.
“You sure this is your first time?” Y/N blushed, shying away as she nervously nodded, chuckling at the same time. “I’m guessing .. I did a good job?” Jungkook hummed to himself, turning the heat off. “Upstairs” “Huh-“ “Y/N” Y/N immediately got out the car, going inside the house as Jungkook got out the car as well. He sighed, thinking to himself as he went up the sidewalk.
“First time my ass” Jungkook whispered to himself as he went inside the house. “So-“ “Dont ask no question and don’t knock on this damn bedroom door” Jungkook interrupted Hoseok as he went up the stairs and into bedroom .. and almost stripped.
And i mean when I say, almost stripped at the sight he saw.
Y/N looked at the big mirror in front of her, naked as she admired every curve, looking at herself with beauty in her eyes. Jungkook was shocked. “Wow” Y/N looked up to see Jungkook admiring her as she cleared her throat. “I-I’m sorry I was just -“ “No .. you’re beautiful” Red rushed to Y/N’s cheeks, thanking him as Jungkook got closer.
“All of this .. you sure this your first time?” “Why would I lie about that Jungkook?“ “People lie Y/N” “You think I would lie about this Jungkook” “Ok ok” Jungkook connected their lips, hearing the soft moans coming from Y/N as he picked her up and laid her on the bed. Jungkook kissed every piece of skin, creating love marks and skin stopped at the heating hood that was just begging for attention.
“P-Please?” Jungkook up at her, smirking at the begging as he kissed the inside of her thighs, teasing her. “D-Don’t do that .. don’t do that please” “Oh you don’t like that? You don’t like me teasing you?” “No .. no I don’t like it , please” Jungkook kissed it, feeling her shudder and body jolt at the little pleasure she received.
“I’m gonna be gentle with you ok? Just tell me to stop when you’re uncomfortable” Y/N nodded and Jungkook pulled her closer to him by the thighs and slowly licked around her, gently eating her out.
Y/N was in paradise.
“O-Oh my god! Fuck .. daddy” Jungkook stopped, looking up at her as Jungkook’s body turned hot at the nickname. “Oh i’m sorry .. I’m sorry-“ “I’m gonna enjoy this more than I expected” Jungkook applied pressured, catching Y/N off guard at the movement as her eyes rolled at the back of her head. “F-Fuck! it feels good .. daddy fuck!” “You like that? You like that daddy’s mouth” “YES! I feel like .. I feel like i’m going to release something” Jungkook was excited, fastening his pace.
“Release it baby, let it all out for daddy. You wanna cum for me?” “Y-Yes! Yes I’m getting close - fuck!” “You got it baby, you got it good girl” that nickname did something to her, releasing all over his face as her legs became half-numb at the orgasm. “Good girl, good girl keep going baby” Y/N couldn’t stop, soon after stopping she breathed heavily at the experience. Jungkook cleaned her up with his tongue, hovering over her. “You ok?” “That .. that was amazing” “You feel good” “Yea … but i’m still horny” “You’re not alone babygirl, turn around for me” Y/N flipped over, feeling Jungkook’s hands caress her body, as he kissed all over it.
“Ok i’m gonna stick it in alright? You know what to do when you feel uncomfortable” Y/N nodded, arching her back as Jungkook slowly stuck it inside her. He hissed at the tight feeling, his cock being squeezed by her insides as he pushed it all the way. “O-Oh god! I’m so full, fuck!” “That’s my good girl, take it all for me” Her eyes rolled at the back of her head, feeling every inch of Jungkook inside her. “It feels good .. move? Please?” Jungkook circled his hips, hearing Y/N’s moans fill his ears.
“Fuck, you’re wet … overly wet. I can’t hold it” “D-Don’t, fuck me please” Jungkook didn’t waste no time, putting all his pressure into Y/N. Probably the whole town could’ve heard how loud Y/N was as Jungkook fucked her guts out. “F-FUCK! It feels so good, so fucking go-good!” “You feel that cock huh? Feel that cock in and out of that pussy? That wet drenching pussy you’ve been hiding from me huh, you’ve been hiding that pussy away from me i’m offended baby girl, very offended” Y/N’s pussy clenched at the dirty words Jungkook drilled into her head.
“Just for y-you daddy, i’ve been waiting for th-this .. i’m sure you’ve noticed” Jungkook chuckled, stopping his movements and turned her around. “Eyes on me” Jungkook started up his movements, fucking her deep as Y/N rolled her head back against the pillows below her. “You’re so d-deep!” “That’s the point, now listen here,” Jungkook started, snaking his tatted hand on her neck and they made eye contact. “You’re gonna remember this night, this moment. Every moan, every yell, how you made feel … haven’t felt like this in a very long time, and you think you’re gonna leave out here? Baby your mind, you belong to me. You understand?”
“Y-Yes daddy, i’m just for you .. i’m just for you daddy fuck!” “I want you to cum on my cock, cum on this hard cock for me ok?” “Y-Yes! Yes i’m gonna cum! I’m gonna cum daddy please? Let me cum for you” “Cum for me baby, cum for daddy” Y/N got louder, her body tensing and heat rushing over her body and soon released everything she had, squirting on his cock. “There you go that’s my good girl, that’s my good fucking girl keep going, keep going for me” Y/N’s eyes disappeared from her sockets, still squirting all over the place.
She came to a place where she was finished, catching her breath as she regain her consciousness. “Looks like i left someone out” Y/N said softly, reaching for Jungkook’s cock and started stroking it hearing Jungkook’s moans that turned into soft whimpers. “First time my a-ass. Fuck, i’m getting close” “I .. practice? Just for you, cum on my hand” Jungkook didn’t hesitate to cum all over her hand and arm, letting it all out before Y/N took her hand and licked all the cum out as she made eye contact with him.
“Dirty girl, you dirty girl” Y/N smiled innocently at him as they both smiled at each other. “You know what this means right?” “Yes .. I do, and i don’t need to tell you, what this means” “I know exactly what this means, and we don’t tell Hoseok until it’s been a 2 weeks” “I ALREADY KNOW DUMBASS!” Jungkook huffed, throwing his head back as she laughed at her brother’s voice. “I love you” “I love you too .. how you feel about round 2?” “Oh you don’t gotta ask me twice” “YALL ARE JUST NASTY!”
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Dirty Little Secret
ꕥ Pairings: Toji Fushiguro x Fem Reader
ꕥ Warnings-MDNI-explicit sexual content, dirty talk, Toji calls reader 'doll, ma, slut (Toji and Doll just work lol) Age gap- reader is 21, Toji is 39. - This chapter-rough sex, anal sex, whipping, daddy kink, breeding kink, squirting, face slapping, oral (fem receiving) FREAKY ass chap lmao, reader is a brat and Toji is a whole freak
ꕥ Word Count-this chap- 7k
ꕥ Summary- Toji Fushiguro is your dad Shiu's best friend for years. You've known him most your life. You come home for spring break to relax, and who pops up at the fucking doorstep? Toji. He's nasty, annoying, perverted and... Sexy. Hot. Built. And makes you think, maybe your first time shouldn't be with some college boy? But with this buff dude who can tie a cherry stem with his tongue and a scar on his damn lip.
Chapter 9 - Masterlist - Playlist
Chapter 10
The next day
You and Toji Fushiguro are going on a date, it feels so… insane to say that out loud, but here you are in Toji’s Mustang, and his big hand is on your thigh, bare with the pretty little black dress you’re wearing. Your fingertips brush up and down his knuckles gently, feeling the roughness of his skin, and he keeps sneaking glances at you, tongue running along that scar so sexy.
Fuck how are you so attracted to a damn scar? To everything about him, how he’s wearing this dress shirt, so different from his thin gym tees, and you see how it has to stretch over his broad chest. He’s so fucking sexy, you find yourself rocking your hips side to side, thighs shifting. He smirks at you, dark green eyes darting to your bare thighs as you make that motion.
“Excited, doll?” He asks, and you flush a bit, as his fingers brush up and down your thigh, making you tremble.
“You do look really handsome, Mr. Fushiguro.” He snorts at that, rolling his eyes then focusing back on the road.
“Making me sound old as fuck, brat.”
“Well…”
“I’ll beat that ass.”
“You’re not old, silly.” You lean close, pecking a kiss on his cheek, with a little bit of stubble tickling your lips, and he sighs then, as you rest your head on his shoulder, inhaling his scent, so manly and he’s wearing some cologne you really like. “I can’t believe we’re going on a date.”
“So surprised? I have a girlfriend I never see, and haven’t taken out.” You tense a bit then, hearing the clear pain in his voice, as you chew your lower lip.
“I don’t think you’ve called me your girlfriend before.”
“Yeah because I’d like you as a wife.”
“You can’t say shit like that!” You pull away, crossing your arms and looking out the window, trying to control your rapidly beating heart.
“What shit, the truth?” He counters, yanking you back to him.
“That’s insane talk. You know it.”
“You think I am sugar coating shit, who the fuck do you think I am? I’m not gonna whisper sweet shit I don't mean, doll.” You blink back emotions, sighing.
“It’s crazy, Toji. How would it work?”
“Go to college online and move in.”
“And my dad!?”
“He’ll get over it when he has a grandbaby.”
“Toji!” He’s scowling, his hands tightening on the wheel as you glare right at him. “Where is all this coming from?”
“Where’s it coming from?” He scoffs, pulling up to a pretty restaurant then, parking and looking at you with his dark brows low. He turns off the car and then bends over, cupping your face. “Did I not tell you I’m fucking in love with your bratty ass?”
“And I love you, but… isn’t this just…”
“Just what?” His words are short, as you look down, but he snatches you by your chin, squishing your cheeks. “Just what, some fun on breaks? I told ya that’s not what I’m wanting. I want you.”
“And I want you. But it’s fucking scary.” He sighs, brushing your hair back, before cupping your face, slamming his lips on yours, and you meet him, hungry for more, kissing more and more, desperate and breathless soon.
“Want you to stay with me. In my arms, got me sappy and shit.” You giggle a bit, blinking back emotions as he whispers those words.
“Toji who knew, you’re so sappy-”
“I will beat you later. Beat your ass black and blue.” You get excited if anything, earning his sexy glare, a big hand squeezing your hip over your little dress. “Keep acting up, no date, I’ll fuck you right here.”
“Fine, fine I’ll be good!”
“Mmhmm.”
Toji is opening your door, but before you all go in he’s pressing you on the car, big hand gripping your ass now, and you feel heat pool, desire in your core, like you can’t breathe. He’s looming over you so big and tall, and you can’t stop the little whine that escapes your throat, earning his lidded gaze and exhale.
“Better be good. I’ll fuck you right here.”
“You will not!”
“Wanna bet, doll?” He licks his lips and your hands slide up his chest now, head tilting back to look up at him.
“No, you’re fucking crazy, you just might.” Toji’s chuckling now, and then kisses you softly, sweeter than usual, intoxicating you with how multifaceted he is, as you peel back all his layers slowly. “Let’s go, I’m excited!”
“Come on, then.” He’s holding you by the waist, hand on the small of your back, as you both head to the pretty restaurant, it’s a steakhouse and much nicer than you’d expect from Toji. For some reason you figured some seedy little place or something, you’re impressed as he pulls out a chair for you.
“Oh, thank you, Mr. Fushiguro.” He scowls as he pushes your chair in, sitting all sexy and handsome across from you.
“You’re such a fucking brat. I’ll order you chicken nuggets, how about that kiddo?”
“Chicken nuggets!?”
“Mmm, so cheap too. Do we need crayons and shit-”
“Fuck you, old man!”
“Ahem… hello.” The waitress comes as you two stick your tongues out, and you cover your face, blushing as Toji chuckles, leaning back in his seat. You struggle to save face, kicking him under the table, and watching his knuckles go white as he’s clutching the little black table.
“Hello, he wants the kids meal-”
“Steak for me, kids meal for her-”
“You have to be twelve and under, I’m afraid.” She says seriously, and you and Toji burst into laughter, earning this girl’s confusion. You both struggle to hold in your laughter, getting more serious.
“Can I get a glass of white?” You ask, and she smiles then, nodding and tapping the tablet for your order.
“Can I see an ID?” You pull it out of your purse, showing her, and she then turns to Toji.
“Anything to drink, Sir?”
“Mmm, give me a beer.”
“Got it.”
“Card him too!” Now Toji is kicking at you, and you’re surely confusing this waitress.
“May I see your ID, Sir?” He rolls his green eyes, dark lashes fluttering, and you can’t stop the grin as he shows her the ID. “Very good, any appetizers?
Toji starts to order, and soon you and him are nibbling together, he’s handing you little bites of food, he is scooching your chair next to him, and you’re right next to him now, his big hand burning your skin. You bite your lip, snuggling to his shoulder and sipping your wine.
“Fuck this is nice.” You say softly, Toji hums at that, thumb brushing your inner thigh and making you overheated, as you look up at his eyes, dilated by the soft lights of the restaurant.
“It is nice, could be all the time if you’d live with me.”
“You know that’s-”
“Crazy. Ya keep saying that like we’re not crazy together period.” You sigh, running a fingertip along the glass then.
“That’s true. I mean, theoretically I can do journalism anywhere, it’s all from my computer mostly.”
“See, there you go. You can do that and clean my house-”
“Hell no.”
You both laugh again, as you roll your eyes, as his hand slips up more, taking your breath away. “You like that idea.”
“Shh, you’re so misogynistic.”
“And you eat it up.” He whispers, thumb brushing your already damp panties, you struggle not to cry out, as his touch makes you so needy.
“Maybe.” You admit, and he smirks, eyes lidded as he leans down, turning slightly to kiss your temple, but he’s now rubbing your achy clit in circles, and you bury your face against his neck, crying out your pleasure as quietly as you can. He exhales, kissing down to your ear.
“You’re my little slut, ain’t ya doll?” He cooes ever so quietly, and you just nod eagerly, there’s no sense acting otherwise, you’re letting him run his fingers under your lacy panties, letting the rough pad of his middle finger circle your clit, which twitches in response. Your nails dig into his strong arm, as you struggle to act normal. “Asked ya a question.”
“Yes, I am, Daddy.” You whisper back, and then he’s shoved a thick digit in your little entrance, and you bite your lip so hard it hurts, as you’re gushing around his finger, just barely inside you. “Oh my… fuck…”
“So easy, so wet already, just f’me, huh?” You just nod, then the waitress comes back with your food, and Toji eases back, sucking on his finger blatantly, making your mouth drop as he grins over at you. “Yummy. Looks yummy, yeah doll?”
“Um… uh huh.” Your hands shake as you shut your eyes for a moment, struggling to come to, the man ruins your brain.
Soon you all are digging in, as you try to cool down, then suddenly after about twenty minutes of laughing, of flirting, and of talking shit with the man you’re stupid in love with, a woman comes up to you. She saunters, so tall with blond hair, muscular and lean, swaying her hips in a gorgeous red dress.
“If it isn’t Toji fuckin Fushiguro.” She speaks all sultry, trailing a hand across Toji’s broad shoulder, over his starch business shirt, earning his glare.
“Sure is. Ya need something, Hana?” She scoffs then, leaning down, and Toji takes her hand off his shoulder, as she’s got her perky little breasts full on display, to the point you can see her nipples almost.
“A girl can’t say hi?”
“Nah, not when I’m with someone.”
“I see. And who’s this?” Her voice is purring, you outright scowl at the pretty woman, then glare at Toji, who’s covering his face and wiping down it with a tired expression.
“I’m his girlfriend.” You say then, and Toji smiles, scar stretching as his lips quirk up. She scoffs then, looking wildly at Toji.
“You, dating? Since fuckin when?”
“Yeah, so what’s it to you?” His voice is terse with her. She huffs a bit, crossing her arms and analyzing you.
“So, what, we fuck steadily for a year, and you go get some young little girl to date now? Don’t want someone your own age, Fushiguro?”
Toji scowls, his dark brows low over his eyes, jaw tense. “Not that at all, just didn’t wanna date you.”
She gasps and you can’t stop your laughter, even when you try to sober up, earning more of her ire. “She’s like a teenager!?”
“I’m twenty one. See.” You hold up your wine glass, as people are starting to look at you all.
“You’re interrupting our date. Go on now.” Toji waves a hand dismissively, earning more of her anger, as she then takes your glass of wine and splashes it right in your face. You gasp at that, standing up then, chest to chest, as Toji stands up, furious, scowling.
“Excuse me, bitch? I didn’t do shit to you.” You shove at her with open palms, making her nearly topple backwards.
“Why don’t you go back to school and get someone your own age?” She bites out those words, and you raise a brow.
“I’m gonna give you a minute to leave before I fuck you up.” You ball up fists then, and she turns, scoffing.
“Stupid little whore-”
Well, you gave her a chance, yeah?
You grab her by her hair then, knocking her on the floor, and now the entire restaurant is in shock, watching as you straddle her in your pretty black dress, and you hold your hand up. “Drink, Toji.”
He chuckles, handing you his beer, and you smirk as you pour the entire amber contents of the pint on her face, and she sputters under you, a whole sloppy fucking mess now. She’s clinging to her face as you stand, laughing maniacally as her makeup drips down her face in streaks, and she opens her eyes only to shut them again, screaming.
Toji is chuckling right with you now, as she shakes some of the liquid off, scowling at you. “How dare you!”
“You spilled one on me first, so.”
“Immature little kid.”
“Says you, the woman who comes and starts shit with a man that didn’t wanna date her? He’s mine, got it?” You snatch him up by his arm, as he looks to you practically with hearts in his damn eyes.
“Miss, we must ask you to leave.” The manager comes then, and she screeches, pointing at you and stomping.
“But she did this to me!”
“Yes everyone saw you approach and throw a drink at her. You need to pay your bill and leave.” She is dragged away, and Toji pulls you to him, tilting your chin, but you shove at him.
“I’m mad at you, too.” You hiss through your teeth, and he scoffs, gripping your shoulders tightly.
“Excuse me, brat? Lemme just find you sexy right now….”
“Nope. Check please.”
*****
You two are both outside now, screaming at each other as Toji carries your little take home bag, as you get in the car he throws it at your lap. You shove it back in the passenger seat now, as you feel the adrenaline pumping, sure you’re furious at that bitch, who’s now flipping you off on the sidewalk, but you’re also upset that this is what happens on your date.
Toji was a hoe.
“Put on your fuckin seatbelt, now brat.” He orders, snapping it then, and you unsnap it, just for him to snap it again, and you to unsnap it, smacking at his hand. “The fuck are you mad at me for!?”
“Is that what I’ll deal with!? Your hoe life all over.”
“Look, I didn’t ask her to be a bitch. Put on this fuckin seatbelt, or I swear you won’t be able to sit.” You take a shaky breath, as both of your chests heave, and the energy in the car is so intense you can’t take it.
“Fine!” You let him snap it as he starts the car with a shaky hand.
“Can’t take you anywhere, can I?”
“Me!? Me!?”
“Yeah you, causing a whole scene with that temper, angry little elf.”
“Elf!”
“Hard of hearing?”
“Fuck off! I’m mad because you clearly had something serious enough she’s bothering me. She said you fucked her for a year.”
“And, so what, now I fuck you, get over it.”
“Aw, romantic.”
Toji’s eyes narrow as they set on you, as you two sit at a red light in the quiet night. “Who’s on a date, you or her, brat!?
You laugh, shaking your head. “Fuck you Toji.”
His laugh is harsh. “Fuck me, fuck me?”
“Yep. Fuck you.”
“You’re mad at me for what?”
“Being a manwhore!”
Toji’s forearms, visible in the evening, those veins wrapping around them turn you on far too much, as he grips that steering wheel so tightly, and you struggle to remember why you’re mad. “You knew it when you fucked me. And guess what? I’m good at fucking the shit out of your little pussy ain’t I?”
His words hit hard, and you feel it, right in your core, that deep husky voice and nasty words. “Pfft. Maybe.”
“You really talking shit like that, doll?”
“Sure am. How many more women will I meet?”
“Probably a lot. What’s it matter, I am with you, annoying little bitch.”
“And you’re such a hoe.”
“Means I eat pussy like a champ.” You gasp, smacking his hand as he grips your thigh.
“You ate her out, that makes me mad. So mad. Should have punched her.” Toji laughs now, only serving to make him more attractive and make you more angry, an infuriating mix.
“Doll, you were a baby when I fucked most of these women, couldn’t even legally touch you!? What, you wanted me to be some virgin? My kid is your friend, clearly I’ve been fucking a long time.”
“Ugh, whatever. Fuck you.” You cross your arms as he pulls up to his home, and he’s at your door in a flash, dragging you and shutting it with a loud thud as he’s pulling you further. When he’s inside he’s shoving you against the front door, hands on either side of you, and you see his vein pulsing in his jaw at how angry he is.
“Fuck me, huh brat?” I think I’ll fuck that attitude outta ya.” He grabs your hair roughly now, pricking your eyes with tears, towering over you, and you find yourself strangely excited.
Is it strange?
Toji has always had this effect, when he’s mad at you and you get soaking wet, your cunt right now is just dripping, as you ache for him. You tilt your chin up then, narrowing your eyes, not remembering just why you were so mad at Toji, but now he’s got you on one.
“I have a right to be mad, old man.”
“No, you don’t, I clearly stopped everything since Spring break. I didn’t even look at anyone the whole time I was gone.” You blink back tears then, as he’s got his other hand gripping your waist so tight you can’t stand it, gripping the silk material of your dress, bunched in his hands.
“You really didn’t?” You whisper, and he sighs, lips just an inch away from yours now, and you can taste him, that taste that fucking kills you, as you both pant heavily, as he’s scowling at you.
“How could I see anyone but you, little fucking brat. You think I want anyone the fuck else?”
“She was all elegant, and pretty… and…” You’re sniffling now, as your insecurities hit you, and Toji sighs.
“Ain’t shit compared to you. Y’know how beautiful you fuckin are!? You know how sexy? How perfect your body is?” You tremble, as he turns you then, pressing you against the door face forward, unzipping your dress, baring your skin to his hungry gaze and his hot touch. “I’ll take you in a Hello Kitty bikini over any bitch.”
Fuck.
You’re being petty, stupid. You sigh, trying to calm down now, but he’s simultaneously putting you over the edge of how bad you want him. “T-Toji… M’sorry. I let it get to me. Am I just young, stupid!? I…” You gasp as he yanks your dress down, pulling it past your hips, and he moans softly, hands sliding down your every curve and line.
“You’re young, you’re stupid-”
You glare back at him. “Hey!”
He chuckles a bit. “But you’re beautiful. You’re mine. My little doll, don’t you fuckin know?” He kisses down your spine then, pressing hot trails of his lips as you step out of your dress, as he eases those heels off your feet.
“I shouldn’t have yelled at you. You didn’t even know me…”
“I knew you, but you were barely twenty, off limits. Think I didn’t jack off to you then?”
“I’m dumb, fuck.”
“Mmm, you were a virgin. It’s all it is. But you’re not now, are you?” You shake your head, as he smacks your ass gently, one cheek than the other. “And when you threw her to the ground, lemme tell ya how hard ya got me?”
“I did?” He chuckles, kissing up your thighs now, fingers gripping into the plush flesh at the center, and his breath is hot, tickling you, you’re so shaky you can barely take it.
“Sure did, sexy as fuck.”
“Ah!” You scream out as Toji pulls your thong to the side and licks a stripe up your slit with the flat of his tongue, lapping at the wetness already pooled there.
“And you, little bitch that you are, got this wet from making me angry? Was that the goal, get Toji mean with ya?”
Shit.
Your pussy did this maybe!?
“Did n-not. Fuck you.”
“Nah think I’ll fuck you.” He stands then, turning you and picking you up, throwing you over his shoulder, smacking your bare ass so hard this time you cry out at the sting, as the fans whirl from his ceiling and cool air hits them. You gasp, up far too high.
“That hurts, you damn big brute! Caveman!”
“Ah, getting yourself even wetter? Slutty little brat.” Toji huffs, fingering you then as he holds you up over his shoulder, and you’re moaning, soaking his fingers, as he bites the fuck out of your hip, before tossing you on his bed, and you bounce at the impact, gasping.
“Toji, I am sorry. Daddy…” You crawl on your knees, just in your panties and bra now, and Toji is furious, veins in that thick neck bulging, his hands brutal when they push you down again, on your back, and he’s yanking your panties down your thighs, making you shiver with desire.
“No, you’re not just bad, you’re very fucking annoying and bad. You wanna drive me fuckin insane, then you get the consequenses, got it?”
“Daddy I said sorry.” You blink your lashes, and he hesitates, then shakes his head, putting your panties to his face and moaning, he’s so nasty but it makes you even wetter, and he clearly sees it pooling down.
“No, not getting out of this one, brat. I’m done with your attitude, it seems I gotta teach you manners. Your dad didn’t, let you run around and be such a little brat, all the time. Spoiled.”
“Toji…” You get this tiny amount of fear then, as Toji takes off his belt, and your cunt throbs around nothing as he flips you, and you feel something silky wrapping your wrists now. “Toji!”
“Hush this mouth before I gag you.” You whine pathetically now, as your tits are shoved out of the bra, bouncing out for his view as he circles you on the bed.
“I’m tired of your mouth. I only want you, annoying as fuck as you are. Got me, doll?” You nod, biting your lip as he bends down, tilting your chin up and kissing you, bruising in his kisses, and you melt into him, but then he’s smacking your cheek, making your face sting. “Answer me.”
“Yes, Daddy. I’m sorry.”
“Not good enough, but it’s a start.” He pushes your head down into the mattress then, running his leather belt along the curve of your ass, and then he smacks the fuck out of you with that belt, so hard you scream. “One. How many do you think you deserve?”
“N-none, daddy.”
“Wrong answer doll. Let’s start with how many times you said ‘Fuck you Toji’ yeah?” He mocks your voice, and you’re whimpering, then he smacks you with the belt again, burning your skin, and then he slides a finger between your lips, pulling that wetness out, moaning softly. “And you like it, dirty lil slut f’me.”
“Ngh, Toji I’m really sorry.” You scream out as he smacks you again, fingering you rougher, two fingers, pressing up against your spot, past that tight ring of muscles, against your little gummy walls. Your pussy starts pouring out wetness now, slippery, loud in his room.
“So slutty. You’re not a good girl, are you?”
“I am.”
“Lying to me now. Hmm.” He hits you right across the backs of your thighs, hitting your sore little cunt, and it hurts so bad you’re crying into your pillow now, but your pussy is almost ready to cum, you’re so fucking ready. “Got something to say, brat?”
“F-fuck me, please.” He grips your hips now, pulling your ass up, cheeks apart, spitting down your little ass hole and dripping to your cunt.
“You deserve dick right now, you think so?”
“You want it, old man, stop- okay fuck!” Another smack, lower across your thighs, makes your knees buckle, and he’s pulling your ass back, holding you up, as you sob softly. “I’m sorry, s’sorry… T-Toji…”
“You remember that safe word?” He says softly, pulling your hair and bringing you to your knees, you nod quickly, as his breath tickles your ear.
“I remember it.”
“So you’re good, doll?” You hear it then, the concern, the care, making sure you’re okay even as he’s beating your ass.
“I’m not just good, I’m soaking wet, Daddy.” Your words earn his sexy moan, and he’s turning your face to him, gripping your breasts, squishing them in his hands and his thumbs pressing on your sensitive nipples. Your head falls back, ass arching for more and more of his rough touches.
Your pussy is so soaked when he wraps his arm around your hips, finding your clit, and you’re so wet his fingers slip. “Fuck, you’re stupid wet.”
“Fuck me, please.” You beg, as he’s pumping two fingers inside you, making the most lewd noise, and he pulls them out just before you cum, shoving them in your mouth so deep you almost choke.
“You’re not done yet, you’ve pissed me off so fuckin much. Ya think that was enough hits?”
“I do!”
“And now you beg for dick, pathetic f’me, so fucking slutty.”
“Ugh, fuck you- shit, shit sorry!” Toji’s big hand now smacks the fuck out of you, so hard you’re rocked forward, and you look back with tears in your eyes, and he’s furious now.
“So you’re still running the mouth, gotta fix that.” He shoves your head back down, and then he’s shoved three fingers in your little entrance, stretching you too full, and you’re wriggling every which way.
“T’much!” You whimper the words, muffled by the pillow, and Toji bends low now, tongue on the little unused hole, as he keeps working your cunt. The sensations are too much, there’s so much pressure building you think you’ll explode, your eyes rolling back, thighs shaking.
“Always running this mouth, huh? Do you think you’ll get to cum?” He yanks his fingers out then, and you scream out in pain, empty and pulsing, so close it hurts. “Aw, were ya close, brat?”
“S’sorry…”
“Nah, that’s not a good apology.” Toji slides two fingers in your cunt again, only to shove them up into your ass, and now the stretch nearly breaks you, as his other hand slides down, rubbing your clit, overstimulating and teasing. “Maybe I’ll break you the fuck in, huh?”
“Ngh…” You can’t say a damn thing, you’re drowning in pleasure, in need, as you’re about to cum again, and you’re sobbing hot sticky tears when he stops toying with you completely, when he’s spitting on you again, spreading his hot saliva all over your pussy and ass. “Please…”
“Please what, slutty fuckin brat? Use those words. Or already stupid from my fingers?”
The more he degrades you, the hornier and wetter you are, as his thumb pumps in your ass again. “Fuck me there.”
Toji pauses then, and for a moment it’s silent, then he’s getting undressed behind you, his tip rubbing against your slit, grinding on your clit, between your puffy lips, moaning as he feels how wet you are. Your arms are aching as you can barely breathe, so shoved against the blanket you are feeling so hot everywhere, almost weak.
“So slutty ya need me in all your holes, huh?” He whispers, now sliding his cock up, his thick, reddened tip dripping precum as it rubs your little hole, pressing in and making you hiss at it.
“Slutty for you, Daddy.” He moans then, one hand at the base of his cock, the other gripping your hip, pressing his thumb in the dimple of your back, pressing further, and then you feel him, the thickness inside, so intense you’re shaking violently. He’s gentle for all his talk, for how he usually fucks your pussy, just barely moving, and just that has you a mess.
“Fuck you feel so good, doll. Fuck… are you all right?” He asks, and you smile against the pillow, at how sweet he can be even when he’s literally fucking your ass, which is covered in red whelps.
“It feels good, alot though… can you untie me, please?” He quickly does as you ask, and you move your numb fingers, up on your hands and knees now, and he’s running one hand up your rib cage, wrapping your waist and bending over you, his lips against your ear. “Daddy… it’s s’good.”
“You like it, doll, huh? Want me deeper in that tight little ass?” His husky voice kills you, as he pulls back, and you nod eagerly. “Then what do we say?”
“Please, Daddy. Please- ah!” He shoves in deeper, his hand brutal as it grabs your entire body damn near, as the other braces itself on the bed over you. Your own hands cling to his thick cotton blankets, arching your ass up for more, every inch feels like ten, so good you can’t stand it, eyes rolling back, your toes curling against the bed as he fucks you slowly.
“Oh my fucking… fuck, fuck…” He’s cursing, not moving, moaning and breathing in your ear, making you shiver as your cunt throbs around nothing. “Can’t hold back, can you take it, baby doll?”
“I’ll try, Daddy.” He moans at that again, then he’s shoved in so deep it rips you in fucking half, and you’re screaming, as he’s huffing, his huge cock sliding in and out of your tight hole, his balls smacking your neglected entrance. “Ah, ah, ah!”
“Feel so fuckin good, Ma.” Toji bottoms out, before leaning you forward, on your stomach, bracing himself over you, one hand sliding down your spine, dripping with sweat now. He smacks your ass, bringing your hips up, and starts fucking into you, skin of his pelvis smacking your ass, making it jiggle with each thrust. “Rub that clit, pretty doll.”
“Y-yes Daddy.” You earn his satisfied sigh, as he pulls your hips up more, you’re on your knees, rubbing your clit in circles with your tiny fingers, and one of his hands finds your cunt, filling your pussy with two fingers. It’s so much, too much, your clit, pussy and ass so filled you can’t think anymore.
Your hands join each other, and you’re gushing out, as Toji’s thrusts slow, and he’s rolling his hips, hitting some spot that makes your tummy coil with tension. “You’re doing good, doll, s’good for your daddy, huh?”
“Please… can I cum? Please. I’ll be good.” He laughs softly, slamming his length in you hard, fingering you deeper, until your cunt and mouth are drooling, pools of arousal and saliva, and you’re blinded.
“Cum f’me, doll, let me feel this slutty ass around my cock.” Toji presses in so deep you can’t see, crooking those fingers, and yours slip off as you begin to cum, so hard and so much pressure, your little hole begins to squirt all over Toji’s hands, and you can’t even speak, can’t do anything as it sprays all over the bed. “Oh my god… fuck…”
“S-sorry!? Sorry! S-sorry….” You’re chanting as you keep cumming, and he groans, pausing his movements, to pull his hand back staring at the sticky mess with wonder.
“Sorry, fuck no. You’re such a good girl, squirting f’me.” You blink a bit, as you try to come to, and he’s pulled out of you, making you hiss, so damn sore, as he flips you on your back, rubbing your clit side to side.
“Too sensitive, too much… too wet…”
“Oh, doll, fuck no, Imma need you to do it again, gonna drink it.” He says, husky, dragging your hips and spreading your thighs, and you’re yanking at his silky black hair, and he’s lapping at your clit, three fingers back stretching your cunt, and you’re close again. He hums on your clit, and your hips buck up off the bed, and you’re gushing all over again.
“F-f-fuck, ah!” You’re screaming out as Toji drinks you up, you’re spraying so much wetness out, it’s all over his chin, his face, as he grins, long tongue lapping what he can as you make a wet spot in the bed.
“That’s it, that’s my lil slut.” He’s smacking loud kisses on your cunt, leaning up now, shoving your thighs up high, your knees on either side of you, pressing into the mattress, folding you in fucking half. “Imma put a baby in you now.”
“Toji…” He chuckles, smacking your cheek and shaking his head. “Daddy…”
“Mmm, you ready to take it? She sure made a fuckin mess, didn’t she?” He shoves in your cunt now, and it immediately tightens, so sensitive from how hard you had cum you can’t stand it, falling apart with every thick thrust of his veiny cock, as his swollen tip is rubbing right against your spot.
“Too much, too much! Too much!” You’re a mess, writhing and shattering under him, under his heavy weight, pressing down on your thighs with his brutal hands, as his cock bullies your cervix, and you can’t take anymore, damn near blacking out.
“You tryna pass out, brat? Tap out?” He huffs, as you try to keep your eyes open, as your mouth is slack and open, as you’re pushed over some edge. He fucks you so deep you feel him everywhere, as you see black glittery stars, and he’s cupping your face possessively. “Look at me, doll.”
You gaze at him with dilated, cock drunk eyes, narrowing, your lashes shaqdowing your view, as you struggle to breathe, brows drawing together, cheeks flushed, and he studies you with heated dark eyes, shoving in so deep then. He rolls his hips and the tip is just grinding against your cervix, pushing you again, and you’re so weak you can barely moan.
You cling to him, nails digging into his broad shoulders, scratching him hard as you cling to him to tether you, but he’s the one pushing you further and further, as he works you, as he’s heaving his own breaths. His chest contains that heart that thuds erratically now, his thumbs brushing your cheeks gently as his cock presses and stretches you till you’ll break.
“That’s it doll, lemme feel ya around me, can’t fuckin think can you? I fuck you stupid?” You would say ‘fuck you Toji’ but you can’t do anything, he has to swipe your drool off your face then, sticking his thumb between your lips, for you to weakly bite, and he bites out in laughter. “Fucked the brat out of ya.”
You wish you could say something smart, but he’s got you so weak, it’s too much, the pressure, the stretch, his sweat dripping down on you, you just weakly cry out, and now he’s leaned back slightly, putting his weight on your sore thighs. His balls smack the little hole he’d wrecked, as he fills your pussy, and his pelvis smaches against an overstimulated clit.
“Ready for this baby in ya, huh doll? Fill ya so good with me.” He cooes those words out, and all you can do is nod just a bit, gasping, head sinking into the bed as your hips buck up at how deep he gets. “Say it, say it doll.’
“W-want… your babies… Daddy…” You speak in a breathy whisper, hearing that gutteral groan as his rhythm stutters, as your walls convulse around him, and you’re gulping for air, as if he’s choking you, your sore ass fucked deeper and deeper into the mattress, making it throb and ache.
“Take all this cum, be my good girl, yeah?” You nod weakly, then he’s leaned over you, shoving in and his tip is quivering, pulsing, as hot spurts of cum fill you, and she eagerly drinks them in, like she wants it, wants it as bad as you won’t admit. Toji’s kissing you, hot and messy, moaning his pleasure into your lips, his scar brushing against the corner of your mouth.
You’re crying now, tears down your face, as he finishes pumping so much cum, and you’re clinging to him, as he’s tasting your salty tears. He keeps kissing you, long after he’s cum, as your fluids are dripping down the bed under you, and he leans up then, eyes different, they’re softer, his lips are rested, parting as he rubs your face so sweetly.
“I fuckin love, you, little doll.” He murmurs, and you sob more, kissing him and sinking your hands into his hair.
“L-love you. Love you Toji. Fuck. I’m a mess.” You say weakly, and he chuckles a bit, pulling off you, making you suck in a breath as he pulls out, leaving you empty.
“You’re a beautiful fucking mess, so, so messy too.” He fingers the sticky cum between your lips, making you jerk and cry out. “Didn’t know you could squirt, freaky lil slut aren’t ya?”
“I didn’t know either. Fuck it was too much though. I’m done.” You weakly fall back, and Toji sits you up carefully, wrapping an arm around your waist.
“Lemme get you cleaned up, want a shower doll?” He asks softly, caressing your back, brushing up and down, and you exhale, shutting your eyes and sinking against him.
“Yes, please.”
“I’ll take care of ya.” He picks you up with ease, as you weakly let him carry you. “I love taking care of you after I ruin that little mind of yours.”
“Dick.” He snorts, and you can’t summon the energy to glare, you just let him bring you inside his shower, surprisingly gorgeous, with marble tiles, and a waterfall shower head. “This is s’nice.”
“Built it.”
“Built it?” You yawn, blinking bleary eyed as he washes your hair, his rough hands gently, massaging your scalp, as the hot water pours over you both, and the steam rises in the shower.
“Yeah, I built most of this place. Was bare bones.”
“Mmm, my manly man.” He snorts, and soon he’s rinsing your hair, sudsing your body up.
“You’re so pathetic f’me, little doll, can’t stand?”
“Fuck no.” He’s chuckling, holding you gently, and you think that the moment can’t get much better, being in his arms, feeling his heartbeat thud in his chest, so soothing you almost fall asleep then and there. Only to be wrapped in his big, strong arms all night in his bed.
*****
Fuck you feel sick, you sit up as you awaken, and Toji’s sheets are rumpled, your nipples are killing you, more than they have been, and you peer between your thighs, worried you’re on your period. You’re thankfully not, standing now, smelling breakfast Toji is cooking, which should be yummy, tantalizing, but another wave of nausea rolls through you.
You only had one glass of wine!?
You blink at the sun streaming through the windows of Toji’s cozy cabin, standing on wobbly legs, he’d fucked you so good you can barely walk even now, your ass is so goddamn sore from his belt, and his cock it’s ridiculous. You wonder how you’re going to manage to sit even.
You pad barefooted on old wooden floors, seeing Toji’s sexy, strong back now, and you can’t even appreciate it, because your tummy is rumbling and hurts. You bite back it, trying to suck in a breath, and Toji looks back, grinning deviously, dark green eyes drinking you in.
“Sit down and eat, doll. Let daddy cook for ya.”
You can’t even snort, you can’t do anything but cover your mouth, and he then looks concerned, brows lowering, and you run off to his bathroom, throwing up everything you’d digested last night. You’re sobbing as you do, and Toji is there, freaking out.
“Well shit, the fuck!? You okay!?” He’s pulling your hair, trying to be gentle but he’s such a damn brute it yanks your hair.
“Ow- fuck!”
“Shit, my bad. Here.” He’s yanking one of your pony tails off the sink, putting your hair up in a bun then, rubbing his hand on your back as you flush the toilet. “Was it something you ate?”
“No, I don’t think?”
“The wine?”
“One glass, no. Shit am I sick? I…”
You trail off then, and do some math in your damn head, then you gasp, falling back on the tile floor. “Doll, want some water?”
“Fuck no. No, no, no. Shit!” You’re trembling, hugging your knocking knees then, eyes wide in horror as you look at Toji.
“What the fuck is it?”
“You… I… oh my god.”
“What!?”
“You asshole!” You haul off and smack him then, earning his glare, snatching your wrist and shoving you against the wall, pinning you there.
“Me, I didn’t do shit, don’t smack me little fuckin bitch. Explain yourself, what the fuck is…” He trails off then, and brushes your nipple, making you scream out. “Fuck… shit… you’re sensitive, I noticed, and they’re even…”
“Oh my god.”
“Shit. Are you…” He looks up at you carefully, as you struggle to fight another wave of nausea, then he presses on your flat tummy, as you come to the most scary fucking thing you’ve ever though of. “Are you pregnant!?”
Shit.
A/N enjoy the cliffie *evil laughing* ahahahah
Chapter 11
#toji x reader#jujutsu kaisen toji#toji fushiguro#toji smut#toji x you#jjk toji#jjk men#fushiguro toji#toji x female reader#toji x f!reader#daddy toji#fushiguro toji x reader#jujutsu toji#jujustu kaisen
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The Brat Who Mowed My Lawn
Harold:
You know this kid is a real piece of work! But now that I have his body that’s all gonna change.
Chase has mowed my lawn for a couple of years now and I should have fired him for his poor attitude awhile ago.
The only is that he’s only one around I know who will do it well. Being an old man, it’s hard to get around but my ears and eyes still work!
Well I guess that’s a problem of the past for me and more of a problem for Chase.
All I do is catch that boy up to know good. And I knew for a fact he was going to be just as much of a bully and an a hole in college as we was for the last 18 years of his life.
What really upset me was how mean he would be to that sweet gay kid next door Joseph. That kid didn’t do anything to him!
Well I got a surprise for Chase when he wakes up from my nap, not only is now old, going to have trouble moving around but he’s going to hear about his body coming out as a proud gay man!
You know this is the last thing I’m going to do for him which is a free mow of his new lawn haha!
Now I better get back to my new home before he wakes up.
10 minutes later:

“Wooowee!! These piggies right here stink!”
But look how sexy my new young toes look! Let me get a good ole sniff…
*sniff*
Boy that makes my new pecker harder than a pool!
I take a little peak at my growing boner and it’s a pretty good size.
I walk over to my window to see if he’s gotten up yet but that’s when I spot that sweet gay boy walking.
I crack open the window and say, “Joseph!! Hey hold up a minute, I wanna talk to you!”
He looks nervous and I say, “I promise, it’s nothing bad. Just give me 2 minutes.”
I run downstairs and meet him at my door.
He looks at me shyly and I say, “hey I owe you an apology.”
“Really?”
“Yeah I’ve been awful to you and— it’s because I haven’t been honest with myself. I just see you out here being so you and truthful… I guess what I’m trying to say is…. I’m gay too.”
He looks shocked hearing the words come out of my mouth.
“It’s okay Chase, I uhhh I’m kinda surprised but thank you for the apology.”
“Well how I’ve been was not acceptable at all and I would love to make it up to you.”
“Yeah?”
I scoot closer to him, “I think you’re awfully cute and uh… what are you doing right now?”
I was gonna ask him on a date but my bodies hormones are losing control right now.
“Nothing really.”

“Well you wanna hang out?”
1 hour later:
So Joseph and I made out for a bit which kinda led us to heavy pettin’
And well I may have let him explore my new body. And we’re pretty compatible, we both like smelly pits, dirty feet, he even let me play with his cute toes too.
But the best part was the foot job he gave me. It felt amazing on my new pecker. He even let me lick all the cum off his toes.
Now he wants to come back tonight for a “sleepover.” Good thing is that my new parents won’t mind, that it matters I’m a grown adult at my age.
Oh wait I’m getting a FaceTime, oh look who it is! It’s the old sleepy grandpa.
“Hello Mr. Harold, how did you like your yard?”
“SHUT UP OLD MAN! AND GIVE ME BACK MY BODY!”
“Oh no, is everything okay over there? You don’t sound well. Should I call someone?”
“Don’t play stupid! You need to give me back my body or—“
“Or what exactly? You’re going to beat me up? Tell someone? Listen, I don’t think anyone had ever taught you a lesson so I’ll make this easy for you.”
*click*
Poor old man, sounds like he’s going through a lot. Oh well!
*A Few Months Later*
“Ugh are you going to tease me with this clothes on or are you gonna join me?” says Joseph my currently naked boyfriend standing with an erection in front of me.

“Well let me start out with my socks, I know you love my feet after a long day.”
“God you I do love your feet but I especially love that nice cock of yours.”
Joseph impatiently hops into the recliner with me and I embrace his body wrapping my hands and with his cock.
“So glad your parents are out of town, I can’t wait until we’re ‘college roommates’ next week.”
“I know then we can do this every night,” I say pinching his ass.
Joesph or Joey as I like to call him makes a yelping noise,
“Oh my god, I forgot to ask you. Did you hear about our old neighbor next door?”
“Oh yeah, poor old guy. Well you wanna take this upstairs because I’m horny as f*ck now.”
“Please! And you better fuck me tonight Chase, I’m not giving you a foot job again.”
“But!!! But you’re so good at them baby and your feet are so sexy!”
“Nope I want you rail me.”
“Fine!”
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The Body Wearing Convention - Las Vegas
The BWA (Body Wearing Alliance) was formed 20 years ago when the internet was just starting to get popular. Those born with the rare ability of reducing people into wearable skins didn't knew there was more like them out there, but with the help of the internet they started to find others with the same ability, and soon it was created the BWC (Body Wearing Convention)
The Body Wearing Convention is a clandestine event that happens a few times every year, hidden from the prying eyes of the public, It is a secret event where they can gather, share stories, and find solace in the knowledge that they aren't alone in their power.
The BWC happens in a different country every time, for safety reasons, and the main two rules to participate in the convention is: To be a Skinwalker (That's how they call themselves) and to wear the body of a local from that place, that means you can't bring with yourself skins from home.
Currently the secret Alliance is made up of 130 men around the world. But among these 130 members, there are 10 men who are very close friends with each other, they all share one thing in common: They are all gay.
Surprisingly they are the only gay guys of the entire Alliance, while all the others sought power and money, these 10 friends only care about getting hard in a new sexy body, It was like a sport for them. That's why they created an online group chat, where they can talk and share pictures of their current bodies with each other.
The location of the BWC this time is: USA - Las Vegas.
The 10 friends all arrived individually at the city in an early Friday, the convention would occur during the weekend, so they had to find a new skin quickly, and so they went straight on a hunt for a random local body.
Think of the BWC as the Met Gala, but for people who can turn you into a wearable hollow fleshsuit in a blink. There was this unspoken competition among them, to see who was wearing the hottest or richest skin, and this group of friends clearly didn't care about the last one...
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Carl is a 46 years old married gay man, he is part of the BWA for 17 years, and there is nothing Carl love more than wearing the bodies of fit straight guys. His husband knows he's a skinwalker and is totally fine with it. But because his husband is not a skinwalker, he is not allowed to go to the conventions, so Carl always travels alone.
(Friday, March 1st. 8:19 AM) Carl Sent A Photo

Carl: I just turned this hot Latino stud in the hotel parking lot. He was walking towards his car while talking on the phone with his girlfriend. That's when I slowly walked behind him and turned him. What do you guys think? Do I wear him well?
Harold: You're looking so hot. You always pick the most hottest guys.
Elijah: Wow, you already found a body? That was fast.
Joel: He's not that impressive, I would give him a 6/10 lol
Elijah: Stop being a jerk Joel. This guy is clearly a 9/10
Carl: Don't mind him Elijah, he's just jealous of my pick.
Joel: He's not really my type, today I'm looking for a sexy tough looking guy to wear.
Peter: Hot choice of skin Carl! Show us his dick please!
Carl: You will have to wait until the Convention to see it. But i'm telling you, he's really big and thick, I know you're gonna love sucking it.
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David is 34 years old and he is part of the BWA for 13 years.
He first found out about his ability when his homophobic stepbrother was trying to beat him up, David closed his eyes and tried to protect his head, but when he opened his eyes, he saw his hot stepbrother lying on the floor completely deflated. David had the most fun years living the life of his douchebag of a stepbrother, until one day, his stepbrother just "disappeared"
(Friday, March 1st. 9:46 AM) David Sent A Photo:

David: I made two new bodysuits. I saw the handsome blond one at the hotel's pool, he was trying to seduce some girls by showing off his hot body, he just didn't knew he was actually seducing a skinwalker. To get him, I first had to convert this cute room service attendant, after I put him on, I got access to his room and walked inside. I think I'm going to use the attendant tonight for some fun.
Elijah: Oh, the good old room service method. It works every time.
David: It was you who taught me this method back in 2011 when I was still a new member of the BWA.
Damian: It brings back good memories from that one time where we all stayed at the same hotel in the 2011 Convention. Good times.
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Peter Is a 40 years old gay bottom who love to turn big hunky men into Bodysuits and act like a slut in their bodies. He is part of the Body Wearing Alliance for 9 years.
(Friday, March 1st. 11:28 AM) Peter Sent A Photo:

Peter: Do I look cute? This is Ramón, I turned him at an alley while he was jogging, he's a bodybuilder. I'm gonna make such a good use of his muscles. I'm sure you guys are going to love the muscles in his ass the most.
Joel: I love how you always pick the most biggest guys.
Daniel: I feel bad for this poor bastard, of all the Skinwalkers, he was picked by the most perverted one.
Peter: lol
Carl: He's huge. I'm going to enjoy burying my new thick latino dick in your bodybuilder's ass.
Harold: I really like his pecs. I want to suck on them when we meet tomorrow.
Peter: It's always the pecs for you isn't, Harold? lol
Harold: You're not lying. Actually I just saw this hot guy at the mall and he seems to have very big pecs. I'm going to follow him.
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Harold is a 28 years old scrawny gay man, he has no muscle definition, but he love pecs and it was what he first looked for in a body: Their huge pecs. If the guy didn't had two big meaty pecs, he wound't want them.
He went to the local LA mall to hunt for a body, he knew that the mall was always the perfect place for hunting skins. And he was proven just right when he saw this big and tall hunk walk inside a clothing store. Harold smirked as he entered the store and followed the man.
(Friday, March 1st. 1:05 PM) Harold Sent A Photo:

Harold: Who want some milk boys? Daddy got all the milkers now.
Peter: Oh my god, look at the size of these tits. I will let you suck on Ramón's tits if you let me suck yours.
Harold: This sounds like a good deal.
Carl: Very nice choice of skin! Good job, Harold.
Peter: Can you send a video of you playing with those hairy tits and pinching his nipples? Please?
(1:15 PM, Harold Sent A 20 Seconds Video To The Group Chat)
In the vídeo he was in the middle of the store, squeezing his new pair of meaty hairy pecs, he lifted one of them and let go, watching them bounce, then he pinched his left nipple and let out a deep loud moan. Without feeling any shame for being in a public space. It wasn't technically him who was being humiliated in public, so he didn't cared.
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Damian and Rashad are a black gay couple (47, 49) they have been together for 11 years and they both had met each other during a Body Wearing Convention back in 2013. It was very known to everyone that they only turned white men into Bodysuits, it was their favorite type of skins. So there was no diversity in their Bodysuit closet, only white men.
(Friday, March 1st. 3:07 PM) Damian Sent A Photo:

Damian: You guys know how Rashad and I love to hunt white boys, so what better place to find some white skins than at the LA beach? We saw this group of young frat boys surfing and we converted these two 19 years olds, they were just the most handsome ones in their group. Turns out they are twin brothers.
David: This is such a hot pair, and the fact they are brothers makes it even more hot!
Carl: I want to fuck the long haired one with my thick latino dick while I pull his hair.
Damian: I like this Idea. His long hair would be great to use as a handle for a hard fuck. I might even try It later tonight.
David: Send us a video if you do.
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Joel is the youngest one of the group, at only 19 he already has a count of 86 Bodysuits, and he's part of the Body Wearing Alliance for only 1 year. That's why, the BWA leader tasked Elijah, a veteran in the art of wearing bodies, to watch for Joel and not let the young man expose their secret society.
(Friday, March 1st. 5:14 PM) Joel Sent A Photo:

Joel: My new bodysuit is still deflating. I can't wait to finally wear him and show him to you guys. He's so hot.
Carl: You gave my bodysuit a 7/10, so he better be a 10/10.
Isaac: Wow he's packing.
Harold: When he deflate, please send us a pic of you in him. I want to see if his front looks as good as his back side.
(Friday, March 1st. 5:40 PM) Joel Sent A Photo:

Joel: I'm inside him now. I saw this sexy daddy at the hotel's bar. I waited for him to go to his room and then I followed him, as soon as he opened the door I converted him, right there at the door's entrance, I mean, of course he took a bit longer to deflate, so I had to drag him inside. I actually wanted to wear a scary looking soldier that I saw at the bar, but Elijah didn't let me. Still, I'm very glad with my pick.
Harold: Holly fuck!!!
Peter: He's a very sexy bodysuit. Wish I was there to give him a very special room service.
Carl: Where is Elijah by the way? Should he not be with you?
Joel: Elijah Is outside, I don't know where he went, but he said he was going to be back soon.
Carl: Did he picked a bodysuit already?
Joel: Yes he did, a young and hot fuckboy. Let me send a pic of him.
Joel Sent A Photo:

Joel: This is the body Elijah picked to wear at the convention tomorrow. I think he got this one at the hotel's bathroom maybe? I'm not sure. I hope he don't mind that I'm wearing his brand new skin.
Elijah: Boy, you're in big trouble!
Joel: Shit, I'm sorry, I thought you wouldn't mind. I'm gonna take him off.
Elijah: Don't you dare taking him off, I'm not going to wear him anymore, I found a better body to wear tomorrow. wait for me, I'm getting up there right now.
(Friday, March 1st. 6:22 PM) Elijah Sent A Photo:

Elijah: You don't want to disobey me in my new body, boy, so you better be on your knees when I get inside, I'm horny and this guy have big balls full of cum.
Joel: Yes sir!
Peter: Oh yes sir indeed!
Carl: lol you're fucked Joel.
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Isaac is a 24 years old gay man, and like everyone else in this group, he was addicted to wearing hunky men. He is more reserved and shy, and don't talk much in the group chat. However, he enjoys jerking off while viewing the photos his friends would send to the group chat.
He might be the most shy and reserved in the group, but once he's wearing a handsome hunk, he becomes a whole new different person, a more dominant and cocky one.
(Friday, March 1st. 8:37 PM) Isaac Sent A Photo:

Isaac: Seeing you guys wearing such hot bodies is getting me so freaking hard. I can't wait for tomorrow. I got this one at the gym's lockerroom. Who wants to take care of my boner?
Peter: I do! I want to get on my knees in Ramón's body and let you use his slutty mouth.
Harold: You're looking so damn hot, Isaac, good pick.
Carl: Was you working out? Your skin looks very sweaty.
Isaac: I was. I wanted to test out my new muscles.
Carl: Great. Can't wait for the convention tomorrow, where we can finally see each other's bodies in person and have the orgy of the year.
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Synopsis: The 3 times everyone else knew you and Lando were in love with each other, and the 1 time you two actually admitted it
female driver reader x lando norris
A/N: for this one, reader is 22 and drives for mercedes with george. also, most of the story is told from lando’s pov because this originally started off as an entirely different 3+1 fic, and I don’t have the energy to fix it. and obviously, things like race results, driver lineups, ect will be changed to better fit the story
1-
Lando Norris knows Formula 1 is unpredictable. He knows you can’t tell what will happen during a race, nonetheless a season. But no matter how unpredictable the sport is, this was the most surprising part by far.
It’s barely been 10 years, but Lando feels like he’s known you forever. You two first met at the Karting World Championship in 2014, a race you were teammates with both him and Zhou Guanyu in. Even though he beat you to first place, your 14-year-old-self didn’t let that stop you from becoming best friends with him.
It was hard to keep track of each other when the two of you were traveling all over Europe to compete in different series, so Lando almost thought he’d never get to see you again. Until in 2020, when he heard talks of the most successful female driver yet making her way through the ranks.
Since you were announced as apart of the Mercedes driver line up in the beginning of 2022, you two have been attached at the hip. You both lived in Monaco and whenever you weren’t busy with media or team duties, you were together. Traveling, in the paddock, celebrating races; if you were there, so was Lando.
Fans were used to that fact and they usually expected it off the track, but not for races and track battles, so everyone was a bit surprised when you two placed P3 and P4 in Bahrain.
It was Round 1 of the 2023 season and even though everyone knows your results at Bahrain don’t dictate your entire season, Lando was still excited you were on the podium. He had qualified P6 behind George and yourself in P5 and P4, and with both Fernando’s Aston Martin and both Red Bulls in front of you, you weren’t expected to make it on the top steps.
Though after a few badly timed pit stops, Lando ended the race in P4, 5 seconds behind you in P3. Cheers rung out from around the grandstands as both the Mercedes and McLaren cars crossed the finish line. Your team garages were ecstatic, climbing the fence to meet you at the checkered flag and shouting congratulations through the radio.
Lando watched from behind as you steered your car into perc ferme alongside Max and Sergio and climbed out to celebrate with your team. It wasn’t P1, but it was a huge achievement to place so high so early in the season and it was obvious how proud everyone was of you.
He couldn’t help himself from leaving his car and engulfing you in a hug. You were both laughing and the Brit could practically hear your grin through it.
He couldn’t help himself from leaving his car and engulfing you in a hug. You were both laughing and the Brit could practically hear your grin through it.
“You did amazing! I’m so proud of you” He says, the words muffled through your helmets.
“Thanks, I wish you were gonna be up there with me, you deserve it” you say, looking up to the podium.
Lando smiles and he’s suddenly grateful his helmet is there to hide his blush. “Thanks. Don’t worry though, soon enough we’ll be up there with a 1-2”
“With me P1, I assume?”
Your eyes are playful underneath your helmet, and he laughs. “Yeah, we’ll see. Go celebrate with your team, Y/n. Don’t ditch me for the after party though!” He shouts as you walk over to your post-race interview, starting to laugh.
“I’d never ditch you!” You shout back over your shoulder, your helmet and balaclava coming off to reveal your grin.
Lando leaves to get weighed and meet his team back in the McLaren garage, keeping his head gear on because of the stupid smile he’s all too aware is still on his face. He was supposed to go to the media pen to finish up some race interviews before sitting down for the debrief with McLaren, but you were his best friend; he couldn’t miss your first podium of the season.
Lando, still clad in his orange race suit, arrives just as Max’s national anthem is playing. He probably should be paying at least a bit of attention to the winner, he’s one of Lando’s best mates after all, but then he saw you, grinning on the third step under the many bright lights of the street circuit, and he couldn’t look away.
He watched with his own smile as you opened your bottle of champagne and poured the majority of it on the Red Bull drivers, before downing the rest of it yourself. He’d wait until you came back to street level, where he’d be waiting for another hug and feeling the sticky champagne and bright grin against his neck.
You’d start talking about the race, the moments where you didn’t think you’d make it to the podium and how happy you’d be if you could get another one. You’ll ask about his race and tell him that next weekend, he’d better be up there beside you, no matter what.
And Lando will be next to you, like he always is, smiling and hanging on to every word you say because you’re happy, so he’s happy too.
What Lando would not realize is that each moment, from when he hugged you after you got out of your car to just then when you were walking through the paddock together, had been caught by multiple people, each one thinking the one thing you two had not yet realized.
“They’re so in love with each other”
2-
Lando Norris did not hate the Miami Grand Prix, at least not usually. But this time around, F1’s 2023 stop in Florida is one he could’ve gladly missed.
It was a double header weekend, and after coming off an extremely mediocre P9 finish in Azerbaijan, Lando was less than excited to spend 4 days in the hot sun in an even more mediocre car. There were so many unnecessary media obligations to go with the flashiness of Miami, and by Friday evening he was already looking forward to the flight back home.
The one thing that did brighten his day was you, who he also had dinner plans with after FP2. He let you distract him with whichever details about your life you had neglected to tell him before, let you get him excited for Sunday’s race again, and let you put him in a better mood.
You two were walking from the restaurant to Lando’s car, still talking and laughing as usual, when Lando asked to you come by his hotel after qualifying the next day.
“If both our qualifying are shit, we can get ice cream and mope together,” he posed jokingly, “and if it goes great, we can celebrate together as well”
But then you stop laughing and your tone changes. “Oh, sorry Lando, but I’m going out with Logan after qualifying; he’s gonna show me around Miami a bit. I’m sure he won’t mind if you come though? Do you want to?”
He pauses; Logan? “No it’s fine. I should probably be relaxing after tomorrow anyways, I think the heat’s getting to me a bit. You two have fun, though” He assures you, keeping a light-hearted tone to mask his distaste.
Logan?
Lando didn’t have anything against Logan, he thought he was a nice guy with a lot of potential. But now he’s taking his best friend away from him and for what reason? You can see Miami any day, any time you want, and if you wanted to, you certainly didn’t need him as your guide.
But fine. Lando does not own you, you’re perfectly allowed to have your own friends, and if you wanted to have an evening out with Logan Sargeant, it was perfectly okay with Lando.
The Brit drove you back to your hotel before setting off to his own, and while you were his best friend and of course, delightful company, he couldn’t help but dwell on the sour taste left in his mouth. He didn’t know why this bothered him so much.
By the time Lando was back in his room, he was too tired to figure it why and decided it was a problem for Future Lando.
He woke up Saturday morning completely forgetting about the events of last night and instead focused on getting the best results possible today. He met up with his trainer for breakfast, left for the track, and joined his PR officer in the McLaren garage. She was escorting Lando to the media pen when he suddenly slowed.
“Lando? What’s wrong?” The woman took note of his tense figure, his hard-set eyes.
All because you were walking away from the media pen with Logan at your side, laughing and looking way too happy for his liking.
He felt the sourness this time. He felt it rise throughout his body and spread like wild fire. His only question was why.
Why were you laughing so much? Why did he feel this way? Why couldn’t he let any of this go? Why were you with Logan and not with him?
“Nothing,” the McLaren drives says. “let’s go” Lando never usually hurries to the media pen, but he didn’t want to look at you and Mr. American boy-next-door any longer.
He was asked questions and he gave answers, Lando just couldn’t tell you what any of them were. This was the problem Past Lando had left for him, and he couldn’t ignore it any longer.
He ruled out anger; he didn’t feel mad, per se, more frustrated than angry. He wasn’t upset; he certainly didn’t feel sad. Possessiveness? He wasn’t usually possessive over his friends though, and you two weren’t dating or anything like that, so there was no real reason to feel protective. Still, Lando couldn’t shake the sourness, and was once again left without answers about you and his feelings.
It wasn’t hard to miss the Brit’s change in attitude, and it wasn’t something his friends were going to ignore.
“Are you okay, mate?” Carlos says, walking alongside him through the paddock after FP3. “You’ve been quiet all day”
“Yeah, ‘m fine. Just tired, I guess” Lando shrugs, not sure if he should tell the Ferrari driver.
“C’mon, you’re seriously not gonna tell me? It’ll make you feel better, trust me” Carlos pushed, and he hesitated before answering.
“I don’t know. I barely know what’s wrong myself” Carlos gives him a look, and he sighs before continuing.
“It’s just weird with Y/n lately. I don’t know but the entire weekend’s just been weird”
“Why? Because she’s hanging out with Logan?”
“How did you-”
“Lando, it’s not that hard to notice, and it’s not that hard to notice why you don’t like it” The Spaniard nudges him, looking at him with a mischievious glint in his eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“You like Y/n, so you don’t like her hanging around with Logan” He says, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“What’re you talking about? I don’t like Y/n, she’s my best friend, that’s ridiculous” Lando makes a face. That makes no sense, of course I don’t have feelings for Y/n.
“Yeah, and the Haas is going to win tomorrow. Lando, I told you, you can trust me. Just admit it, cabrón”
“Admit what? I don’t like her, I told you that” Lando insists, because he doesn’t. There’s no way.
“Okay mate, whatever you say” Carlos says, putting his hands up in surrender and moving towards the Ferrari garage. “Let me know how that ‘not liking my best friend thing goes’”
Lando just shakes his head and sighs. Carlos has no idea what he’s talking about.
Qualifying turns out to be the thing Lando needs to get his mind off everything; he qualifies P6 with Oscar right behind him and confidence in his car for tomorrow. The man spends some extra time going over the data from today with the strategists and leaves the track just after sunset to head back to his hotel.
He wasn’t completely lying to you yesterday night; the heat was having a bit of an effect on him, and it was probably a good idea to relax and stay in for the night. He ordered something from room service that his trainer would approve of and took a shower before climbing into bed.
A knock on his door is the thing that stops Lando from falling asleep.
It’s past 10, no one should be knocking at his door, but that’s not good enough of a reason to ignore the person, so he gets up to answer it and should probably be more surprised that’s it you.
“Not here to collect team secrets for tomorrow, are you?” Lando questions, jokingly.
“I don’t think we need anymore help beating you McLarens, thank you” You play along with a laugh.
“I’m offended. I hope you have an apology along to go with whatever that it” He gestures to the bag in your hands, and you nod.
“I do, but you’ll have to let me in first to get either” Your best friend moves aside to let you into his room and onto his couch.
“Seriously though, what’s up? Is something wrong?”
“Oh no, nothing’s wrong. I just felt bad for ditching you today and figured I could make up for it with ice cream” You shrugged, opening up the bag and holding a container covered in frost.
“I appreciate the gesture Y/n, but we both know our trainers-” You cut him off. “Would kill us if we eat this, I know. That’s why I only bought one, so we could just share and have half. That way it’s not really eating an ice cream sundae, it’s just eating a scoop and a half”
“I like your thinking”
“That’s why you keep me around” You both smile, and Lando gets up to get two spoons.
“You don’t have to be sorry, by the way. It doesn’t bother me that you went out with Logan” He knows you must’ve felt really guilty, because you’re still wearing the clothes you wore in the paddock, meaning you went immediately from wherever Logan took you to straight to get the ice cream and come here, despite the fact you should be in bed and it would be chaos if someone found out you were here this late Saturday night.
He also knows you wouldn’t do this for just anyone.
“I know. I still felt bad though” You shrug, thanking him before taking a spoonful of ice cream.
“Don’t be. Where’d he take you, anyway?” Lando questions. He knows that if he was talking about this any time else, he feel that sourness all over again. But there was no reason to if you were right here beside him.
“Nowhere special; we just walked around, shopped a bit, and stopped to get some food before we realized we should probably head back to our hotels”
“And aren’t you having the same realization now?” He asks, taking another spoon of ice cream.
“Yeah, but I’m not worried enough to the point where I’m actually gonna do it” You explain, and Lando laughs.
“So what? I’m stuck with you for the rest of the night then?”
“You say it like you don’t totally love the idea” You smile playfully.
“You’re right, I’d rather you here with me than anywhere else”
“Me too” The man misses your soft gaze and love-sick smile.
Truthfully, Lando just likes when you’re with him in general.
3-
It was the Austria GP and for the first time in a while, Lando Norris felt a little carefree. He had over two weeks to recover from Canada, the next round was his home race, and things were looking positive for Sunday. He was happy with racing, and he was happy with you too.
Ever since Miami, you two have been closer than usual; fans were used to seeing you guys always together, but this time, they really never saw you without seeing Lando, and Lando without seeing you. Both of you seemed oddly smiley recently and it didn’t go without notice. Even more than usual, it was like you and Lando were in your own weird little obliviously-in-love bubble that nothing could break through.
Maybe that was why you and Lando finished P4 and P5, each of you one place away from a repeat of Bahrain. It obviously wasn’t your best finishes you two have ever had, but it was good enough for there to be a celebration afterwards. The drivers you and Lando were closest to also finished high in the points, and before you knew it, you had agreed to attending the after-party happening in a few hours at the nearest club.
You put on some makeup, fixed your hair, changed into a beautiful outfit, and stuffed your purse with your essentials before you got a text from Lando telling you that he was outside. You insisted that you could drive yourself and he didn’t need to pick you up, but Lando persisted, saying that it was stupid to bring two cars incase you weren’t fit to drive at the end of the night, and had to leave your very expensive car on the street all night.
“You look gorgeous, it almost makes up for the ridiculous amount of time I’ve spent waiting here for you” Lando says with a smirk as you open the door to his car.
You roll your eyes through your blush. “It wasn’t that long. Besides, my room’s on a high floor, it was the elevator’s fault.” You reason, clicking your seatbelt into place before Lando pulls out of the hotel parking lot and onto the streets.
“Yeah sure, blame the machinery because it’s never your fault you’re late”
“It’s not!” You insist with a laugh. He hums sarcastically in response, turning on the radio and letting it fill the comfortable silence
The streets in front of the club are lined with dozens of high-end cars, so you and Lando are forced to park nearly a block away from the entrance. The bouncer lets the two of you in without hesitation, and even from outside, you can hear the bass from the speakers inside.
The interior is exactly how you expected it to be, colorful strobe lights from overhead, music that you have to shout to hear someone over, and a dance floor that’s packed to the brim with celebrities, drivers, and everyone in between.
You and Lando claim the nearest booth to the exit, and he leans in close enough to be audible. “I’m going to get us a few drinks, try and see if you can find a few people” You nod, and the two of you go off in different directions.
You manage to locate Alex, Lily, George, and Carmen in a booth together and after a few very loud greetings, manage your way through the mob again to find Lando and lead him back to your friends. You all start talking and laughing, placing bets on which drivers are going home with a mystery girl, which ones are going to get black-out drunk, and which ones are going to show off their embarrassingly bad drunk dance moves in front of everyone.
Drinks and shots get handed out, a few more drivers join your table, and soon enough, you and your group are somewhere between tipsy and drunk and are moving onto the already-packed dance floor. Lando moved up to the DJ, telling you he’d be back to dance soon, and left you with your fellow drivers and their girlfriends.
You spend a few hours dancing with the girls, giggling through your drinks, and wandering around the club in search for more friends. At the point where your vision starts to got a bit blurry and the music is making your head hurt, you feel a hand on your shoulder and a familiar voice in your ear.
“Hey stranger!” Lando shouts, turning you around to face him.
“Lando!” You call out loudly, wrapping your arms around him in a hug. “Missed you” Alcohol made you a bit affectionate.
“Only been gone an hour and a half, love” Even though you can’t see his face and you’re not at your sharpest, you know he’s got a dumb smirk on his face.
“Missed you too, though” He says, taking the drink out of your hand and taking a sip before wrapping his hands around your waist.
“Are you here to dance with me?” You pull back, looking into his eyes. His pupils aren’t dilated, so you know he’s sober and the designated driver for the night.
“Wouldn’t want to do anything else” Even though everyone else around you is dancing at a fast, eager pace, you and Lando keep your arms wrapped around each other, bodies swaying softly, heads laying on each other’s shoulders.
Even with the flashing lights and booming music, you probably could’ve drowsed off on your best friends shoulder. You don’t realize how much time has passed but at some point, Lando taps your arm and pulls away from you.
“Time to go home, I think” He says, placing his hands on your shoulders to get you to focus on him.
“You think?” You reply, both drowsy and a little drunk.
“I think so. I’m gonna see if anyone else needs a ride and say goodbye, then we’ll leave, okay?” Lando tells you, intertwining your hands together before leading you further onto the dancefloor.
The Brit finds the other drivers and does what he said before handing you your purse and guiding you out of the club, hands still held together. Your best friend hands you his jacket to wear and places his arm around your waist as the two of you walk back to the car.
You know that Lando will get you back to your hotel and to your room where he’ll take your heels off for you. You know he’ll place a glass of water and a few Aspirins’ on a nightstand for you and lay down underneath the duvet with you because he’s too tired to drive back to his own hotel.
You’ll know you two will fall asleep almost immediately, and wake up closer than you were laying last night. You know Lando will not mind doing any of this, will actually like it, because you don’t let him take care of you as much as he’d like.
You know all of these things and a lot of other stuff too, you just don’t know that the person you did it all with is the person you’re in love with, or that he’s in love with you too.
+ 1
Lando always appreciated the summer break after half a season of racing, but there was something special about this one that made him wish it would never end.
You, Lando, and a group of your mutual friends planned a week-long trip to an island in the Caribbean as ‘one last hurrah’ before you two had to fly to Zandervort for the second half of the season. It was your fourth day on the island, and even though every moment since you arrived has been filled with some sort of fun and exciting adventure, this was already your favorite day of the trip.
You and Lando had connecting rooms, ‘a complete coincidence’ as your friends had put it, and this morning, you two decided to take advantage of it and make breakfast together. You weren’t supposed to meet with the others until a few more hours, and you loved cooking with Lando, so shortly after you woke up you made the short journey into his room.
“Morning,” your best friend greeted you, clad in black sweats and an old T-shirt you’ve seen millions of times. “I bought pancake mix from the store in the lobby, but we can run out and get something else if you like?”
“No, it’s okay,” you insist, “pancakes are fine. Besides, I know you make the best ones.”
“I know, you must be so jealous” Lando smirks, grabbing a mixing bowl and pan from the hotel’s kitchenette cabinet.
“Totally. So what’s on our agenda today?” You say, moving around him to take ingredients from the fridge.
“Not much, actually. I think we’re just going to the beach and walk around the town a bit” You nod as you grab your phone and click on the shared playlist between yourself and Lando.
You let the music fill the comfortable silence as the two of you move around the small kitchen. It’s a beautiful and all-too domestic scene; the morning sun streaming through the windows, the soft music in the background, the way you both seamlessly know your way around the kitchen, how easy it was to work around each other. They’re the facts your mind notices too quickly, and it’s hard to stop your brain from thinking about a future where things could be like this everyday.
Within a few minutes, you each had a reasonably-sized stack of pancakes that you brought outside onto the balcony with you. You settle into the adjacent chairs that look out to the waves crashing onto the beach and deep blue ocean. It’s still early; this part of the island isn’t awake yet, and it’s easy to relax in the still quiet.
While you shooed away the image of the future like this, Lando welcomed it with open arms. He thought how effortless it would be to make a scene like this; a hotel room, an apartment in Monaco, a house in the UK, Lando would take either and all of them. As long as you came with it.
His mouth speaking before his brain can control it. “I wish it was like this forever” He blurts out.
“You don’t want to go back to racing?” You look over at him, eyebrows furrowed. He doesn’t look back at you, keeps his eyes on the view in front of him instead.
“No, I do. I mean-” Lando pauses, thinks it over. He gets up from his chair to lean on the railing, his back facing you. This could ruin everything, he thinks. If he says it, he can’t go back, and nothing will be the same again.
He stops thinking.
“I mean with you. I honestly don’t care where we are; racing, on an island, whatever. We could be on another planet for all I care. As long as it’s just you and me, I think I could handle it” He finishes, feeling your presence next to him a few moments later, your shoulders brushing.
“Really?” You ask, eyes widened. You would’ve never thought he felt the same.
“Really. I’ve always felt that way” Then he’s looking you in that way, the way everyone’s been trying to explain to you for a while.
You don’t second-guess yourself when you put your hands around his face and press your lips onto his, and especially not when he starts moving his lips against yours. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you closer to him, and you don’t think you’d be mad if this was your forever.
You two finally pull away from each other, and even though the waves on the beach are still the same waves and the ocean is still the same deep blue, you think that everything changed just a little bit.
You’re still so close you could probably count his eyelashes if you wanted to, and you smile.
“I love you”
His smile mirrors yours the second after he hears it. “I love you too”
You two don’t really have to tell people; everyone figures it out within the first five minutes of being around both of you. Everyone teases you relentlessly, but internally, they’re just glad the two of you finally saw what’s been there all along.
i never really know how to end these. anyways, a lando fic to make up for the time i’ve been gone. sorry about that btw, i got major imposter syndrome and the lack of f1 content makes for a lack of motivation. this is also my first ln4 fic, and i have no idea what to expect from it. hope u enjoyed tho 🫶
#reader insert#formula 1#driver reader#f1 imagine#f1 grid x reader#formula 1 driver imagines#female driver reader#lando norris#lando norris imagine#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x female reader#lando norris x female driver reader#3+1#slow burn#oblivious characters
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